37 RYAN
RYAN
I think I’m falling
At seven, we pull into Ember & Pearl, the neon sign glowing softly against the dark. My brain flashes back to the last time I was here. With her.
I push the thought away and focus on tonight instead.
I step out of the car and circle around to Bailey’s door, opening it. “Your Highness.”
She steps out. “Thank you sir.”
Mom laughs softly as she steps out too, smoothing a hand over the skirt of the dress she’s wearing—the soft brown one I remember from years ago, tucked away in the back of her closet for special occasions that almost never came. It fits her the same way it always did.
“You look beautiful, Mom,” I tell her quietly.
She pauses, and then smiles softly. “Thank you, sweetheart.”
Bailey links her arm through Mom’s, already pulling us toward the entrance, until Mom stops. “Wait, I forgot my purse in the car.”
“We’ll get it,” Bailey says.
“I’ll wait at the door,” I say.
They give me a small nod and turn back to the car.
I continue walking, the laughter and noise from inside slowly coming closer.
I walk under the glow of the lights, closer to the entrance, but then stop.
Because Maddy is standing there. My brain stops working for a couple seconds.
Her hair falls in loose waves over her shoulders, she’s wearing a long skirt that moves slightly in the evening breeze and a simple fitted top.
Dammit, she’s beautiful.
She looks nervous too, fingers tapping lightly against her leg like she doesn’t know what to do with her hands.
She turns around and sees me, her eyes lock on mine. And now we’re both standing there, six feet away from each other, both clearly thinking about the same thing.
I walk toward her, our eyes still locked onto each other as I end in front of her.
“Uh—hey,” I say, sounding as confused as I feel.
“Hi.”
I clear my throat. “What are you doing here?”
Her brows lift. “…You invited me.”
I blink. “I did?”
She frowns and looks at her phone. “Yeah… you texted me. ‘Dinner at seven, Ember & Pearl.’”
I swear I’ve never been more confused in my life.
“Maddy! You made it!” Bailey sings, leaning her elbow on my shoulder and smiling way too big.
Bailey.
I turn to her. “Did you seriously text her from my phone?”
Bailey shrugs. “You left it unlocked. And you were being weird. I just helped.”
“Bailey.”
Maddy shifts. “I can go if this is—”
“No,” I say, fast. Way too fast.
God, I sound pathetic.
“You’re here now. I’m not letting you go home after coming all this way. That’d be criminal,” I add quickly.
She lets out a tiny laugh—nervous but cute. And in that moment, Mom joins us, glowing. “Maddy, darling!” She hugs her. “So good to see you.”
Maddy returns the hug. “Yes, good to see you too.”
I look at my mom and she avoids eye contact completely. Of course she knew.
Mom claps her hands together softly. “Well,” she says warmly, “shall we go inside?”
Together with Bailey, they walk towards the entrance.
Maddy and I stay where we are for a beat longer. And we’re both thinking the exact same thing: We haven’t even talked about the kiss. And now we’re having dinner. With my family.
Well, this should be interesting.
We both let out a small awkward laugh. I gesture toward the entrance, holding my hand out slightly. “After you.”
A tiny smile touches her mouth before she nods and walks past me, the faint scent from her strawberry shampoo brushing by.
The hostess leads us through the warm, low-lit restaurant, menus tucked against her arm, heels clicking softly against the floor.
But I’m barely aware of anything except the blonde girl walking in front of me—until the waitress stops at a booth near the window and gestures for us to sit.
The four of us slide into the booth together.
Bailey looks up at me with the tiniest smirk and I give her a death stare in return.
I’m going to kill her. After dinner.
But also, sitting across from this gorgeous blonde girl isn’t exactly the worst situation I’ve ever been in. So maybe I’ll only threaten her.
The waitress takes our drink order. And a moment after she walks off, Mom folds her hands on the table. “So, Maddy,” she asks warmly, “how’s school going?”
Maddy straightens a little. “Good. Busy, though.”
The conversation moves easily from there. Maddy talks about an assignment she’s working on with Mel and Liam. Something about the heart and lungs I believe, but she throws in some terms I absolutely don’t know the meaning of.
Bailey shares her usual doses of high school gossip. Apparently there’s this guy who has two girlfriends at the same time and he thinks he’s being slick. But his girlfriends actually know about it and plan to get some good revenge on him. These teenagers are crazy I swear.
Mom’s just enjoying the chaos of the stories and for the most part, it feels normal. Except it’s not. Because less than twelve hours ago, Maddy and I literally kissed. And now we’re sitting next to my mom and sister like nothing happened.
I haven’t read a single word of the menu. Not one. My attention keeps drifting back to her. At one point, our knees bump under the table, she glances up and catches me already looking. I don’t even bother pretending I wasn’t.
Mom launches into a story about college—something involving fake wristbands, fake ID’s, and a concert she definitely wasn’t supposed to be at.
Bailey nearly chokes. “Mom. You were committing crimes?”
“I was young,” Mom says with a laugh. “And it was a very good band.”
I shake my head. “I don’t even know who you were before you were my mother.”
“You don’t want to,” she fires back.
The waitress returns for our orders, and I finally glance down at the menu like I’ve been studying it this whole time. Maddy orders first, and then the waitress turns to me.
“Same for me,” I say, even though I have no idea what she ordered.
Maddy looks up, shaking her head slightly and I just shrug, a small grin pulling at my mouth. The look she’s giving me right now makes me want to sweep everything off this table and kiss her again right here.
Unfortunately, I’m sitting in a crowded restaurant with my mother and sister so that might not be a good idea. So instead, I drag my gaze back to my glass.
When the food arrives, it somehow lands on surfing again and Bailey perks up immediately. “We still have to surf sometime.”
Maddy’s smile softens. “Yes, we really should.”
Bailey nods eagerly and Maddy hesitates a second before adding, “We could go next Saturday. If the waves are decent.”
Bailey’s face lights up. “Really? That would be perfect!”
“Of course,” Maddy says, a quiet laugh slipping into her voice. “We’ll have a lot of fun.”
Then after another hour of trying to act normal, Mom reaches for her purse and says, “I’m going to grab the bill. I’ll meet you outside.”
One by one, we scootch out of the booth, standing up.
We pass some familiar faces and crowded tables as we walk towards the entrance.
Some look up and give a tight nod. When we reach the door, I hold it open and Bailey walks out first, then Maddy follows.
She looks up for a moment and our eyes meet for a fraction of a second.
She passes a small smile, but her dimples still show.
I instinctively reach out and brush my hand on her lower back as I follow her outside.
I feel her straighten her back slightly.
We step into the cool night where the warmth of the restaurant disappears behind us. Mom joins us a moment later, the receipt folded neatly in her hand.
Maddy turns to her first, soft and polite like always, pulling her into a quick hug. “Thank you for dinner. It was really nice.”
Mom smiles warmly. “Anytime, sweetheart.”
Then Maddy hugs Bailey, who squeezes her tight and whispers loudly, “Saturday. Don’t forget.”
“I won’t,” Maddy laughs.
Bailey hooks her arm through Mom’s as they start toward the car, but she suddenly slows. “Oh—wait,” she says, pointing toward the sidewalk. “Isn’t that Mrs. Carter?”
Mom squints, then brightens immediately. “Oh my goodness, it is.”
She glances back at us while already drifting in that direction. “We’re just going to say hello for a minute. We’ll meet you in the car, okay, honey?”
“No rush.” Bailey throws me a quick wink over her shoulder.
I laugh, shaking my head. And just like that they’re gone. Leaving Maddy and me alone in the quiet glow of the parking lot.
For a moment neither of us moves. The restaurant behind us hums softly with muffled voices and clinking dishes, but out here the night feels quieter.
She looks up at me. “Well,” she says softly. “That was… nice.”
“Yeah,” I agree.
She narrows her eyes slightly, “Did you enjoy the risotto?”
I just nod my head, completely focused on her eyes only. “Yeah, it was great.”
She snorts. “It wasn’t risotto, you know that right?” There’s a teasing tone in her voice that almost makes me want to beg her to never stop. “It was a pasta dish.”
The playful look in her eyes makes me grin. “Well, what's the difference?”
A small smile plays at the corner of her mouth. “You just copied my order, then?”
I shrug innocently. “I just really liked that dish”
She laughs under her breath. “You didn’t even look at the menu.”
“I looked at the important part.”
“And what part was that?”
“You.”
She shakes her head, clearly trying not to smile.
“Well,” she says, “I should probably go before you forget how to read completely.”
Then her hand settles lightly against my arm.
My gaze drops to her fingers where they rest against my sleeve, then slowly lifts back to her face.
My mind immediately flashes back to last night, the way she sounded against my ear, her legs wrapped around my torso.
And now that I know her lips taste like cherries—I suddenly love cherries.
And the way she’s looking up at me now completely wrecks whatever self-control I had left.
“For fuck’s sake,” I mutter and before my brain can talk me out of it, I take her hand and start walking.
She lets out a surprised laugh, stumbling half a step as I guide her along the side of the restaurant where the light fades into shadow.
“Ryan—what are you doing?”
“Just come here,” I murmur, not slowing down.
We round the corner into the narrow alley, quiet and dim, hidden from the street. The noise from the parking lot fades behind us until all that’s left is the sound of our breathing and the distant hum of traffic.
I stop when her back meets the wall. My hands settle at her jaw without thinking. She inhales softly.
I lean in slowly, brushing a few loose strands of hair away from her face and tucking them behind her ear. My fingers slide down to the curve of her neck.
Her breath catches.
“Ryan…” she whispers, barely any air in it. “Maybe we shouldn’t—”
Before she can finish her sentences, I lower my head and press my mouth gently to the side of her neck.
She inhales sharply, her arms slowly sliding around my neck as her fingers thread into my hair. I press another kiss, slower, not because I want to stop, but because I want to feel every second of this.
The moment she tilts her head to give me access, my lips touch the spot beneath her jaw and her breath breaks into a soft, unguarded moan that sends my grip tightening.
Jesus.
“Ryan,” she says, almost whimpering. “Do you think maybe we need to… talk about it first?”
“I don't really feel like talking right now,” I whisper against her neck. And she lets out a breathless sound.
I trail upward slowly until I reach her lips. Cherry.
Kissing her feels like stepping into the last heat of a summer night—when the air is thick, the world is quiet, and nothing else seems to matter except the moment you’re standing in.
Her mouth moves against mine like she’s just as lost in it as I am. Is it actually possible to pass out from a kiss? Because I’m getting dangerously close to finding out.
I draw her closer until there’s barely any space left between us. She leans into me without hesitation, one of her hands tightening in my hair while the other grips the front of my shirt like she needs me closer.
I want to memorize every part of her. So that when I dream of this moment, which I’m gonna, I have every single fucking detail right.
And then a door slams open. We both freeze instantly. We hear some footsteps, followed by voices, muttering about trash.
The back door. Of course this is the back door.
I press one finger gently against her lips as we both stay still in the shadows. A waiter tosses a bag into the bin, grumbles to himself, and disappears back inside. The door shuts and there is silence again.
Maddy exhales first, a little shaky, and then we both start laughing.
I lean in automatically, ready to kiss her again—but her hand presses lightly against my chest, stopping me.
“You should probably go back,” she whispers.
“Why?” I murmur, still close.
She looks up at me. “Because your mom and Bailey are waiting.”
“They’re catching up,” I say, bracing one arm against the wall beside her head. “That can take hours.”
She gives me a look. The kind that wins arguments without trying.
“…Okay, fine,” I sigh.
“Also,” she adds, glancing around, “making out in a dark alley is extremely cliché.”
“Yeah?” I say. “Well…even if we’re in a dark alley,” I start, “there’s no one else I’d rather be here with.”
Something in her expression shifts the moment the words leave my mouth. She stills for half a second.
I lean in again—but she straightens gently, creating space between us.
“Okay,” she says softly. “We should go.”
Confusion flickers through me for a moment, but I nod anyway. We walk back around the building in quiet steps, the night suddenly cooler than before. The parking lot lights feel too bright after the shadows. We stop beside her car.
“Well,” I say with a small grin, “I’ll see you at school.”
“Yeah,” she answers, not quite meeting my eyes.
I lean forward a little, but she’s already opening the car door.
“I should go,” she says quickly. And then she’s inside, the engine starting almost immediately. The headlights sweep across the pavement and she’s gone before I can process any of it.
I’m left standing there alone in the quiet parking lot, hands still half-lifted like my brain hasn't caught up yet.
What the fuck was that?