Chapter 42
Chapter Forty-Two
She didn’t think she could face him.
She couldn’t bear the thought of Cassius’s face when he realized what she’d done—that she’d betrayed him.
So she stayed in the cellar, next to the Vampyr, who every so often tried to lunge at her through the bars. Whose puddle of spit had grown until it threatened to spill out from under the cage.
“Fuck, Thalia.”
Thalia slowly lifted her head, finding Marcus on the threshold. He rushed to her, hauling her up.
“I didn’t know,” he got out, eyes wide. “I had no idea what your mother was trying to do—”
Thalia shook her head, hollowness ringing out like an empty bell. “I know.”
Marcus’s face fell as he gripped her arms. “You’re freezing.”
Thalia didn’t care.
Didn’t care that her touch was ice as Marcus led her out of the chapel.
Didn’t care that her feet had gone numb and her wrists were bruised.
She didn’t care when Marcus finally left her alone in her room, not even the roaring of the fire able to thaw the coldness that had latched on to her. The horror of what she’d done—what she’d confessed.
The door creaked open, but she didn’t turn around. The scent of eucalyptus and mint enveloped her.
“Thalia?”
She didn’t deserve her name on his tongue. Didn’t deserve the pathetic part of herself that was comforted by it.
“What happened?” Cassius’s words rumbled out.
She stood abruptly, walking to the fire. She planted her feet on the stained rug, trying to put distance between them.
Put distance between him and what she’d revealed to her mother.
Because after this, Cassius would never speak to her again. He might even kill her, and she wouldn’t blame him for it. Not one bit.
“Look at me.” His voice softened.
She couldn’t face the look in his eyes when he realized she’d betrayed him. Her mother would use the information she’d spilled in whatever way she could to kill him and everyone else in Vaccarium.
Her eyes blurred, acid working its way down her throat as a gentle hand gripped her arm.
She couldn’t do it. Couldn’t let him see—
Cassius tugged her, forcing her to face him.
As soon as he saw her face, he stiffened, dropping her arm. “What did you do?”
Thalia could hardly see him through her tears. “I’m sorry,” she rasped.
“Thalia, what did you say?” Cassius’s words sharpened into a blade.
“She knows,” Thalia got out.
Cassius stepped into her space. She couldn’t move, couldn’t escape him. “What does she know?”
Thalia shook her head, her back burning against the fire. “We were right, she suspected that there’s a sickness.”
“And?”
Thalia forced herself to meet his harsh gaze. “I confirmed it.”
Cassius looked as though he’d been stabbed. “Why would you do that?”
Thalia looked away, her stomach rolling. Silence fell as heavy as a hammer.
Cassius finally let out a bitter laugh. “This is it, then? You get what you wanted.”
Thalia’s head whipped up. “What I wanted?”
Cassius’s face darkened. “Your revenge against the Vampyrs. What you’ve been seeking for thirteen years.”
“I didn’t want any of this, Cassius. I didn’t want to be forced into marrying a Vampyr. I didn’t want to be the reason she now has the power to kill you all. And I sure as fuck didn’t want you to turn into one of them!”
Cassius shook his head, his eyes like chips of ice. “At least we’re finally being honest.”
“Honest?” Thalia gasped. “Honest?”
She took a step toward him, fingers curling into fists. “You haven’t been honest since the moment you stepped back into that throne room.”
Cassius’s jaw flickered, but he said nothing.
“You think—you think it was easy for me?” she choked out. “To lie to you? To not be able to do anything as my mother questioned me?”
“What did she do to you?”
Thalia closed her eyes, realizing her slip-up, but she was done lying.
He would know if she was anyway. “There’s a bitten, below the chapel.
” She peeled open her lids, throat tight.
“She’s chained in a cage, her face covered in an iron mask.
That’s how she knew about the sickness—suspected it.
Marcus was there. He—he didn’t know what she was asking of him.
But I think she wants to use the old trenches to somehow enter Vaccarium undetected and do gods know what.
” Her breath shook as she finished. “You should leave, head back to Perden and warn everyone.”
Cassius’s face darkened, and Thalia waited. Waited for him to flee into the night—to disappear just like he had four years ago.
“Come with me,” he finally got out.
Thalia let out a bitter laugh, shaking her head.
Cassius took a step toward her. “Come with me,” he repeated again.
“And do what, Cassius?” Thalia’s eyes blazed. “They won’t trust me. Not after they hear about how I spilled your secrets.”
“So we won’t tell them what happened. The prince already knows the threat of your mother—”
“The prince?” Thalia whirled on him. “The prince who’s disappeared? Who I haven’t even met? I may have let my secrets spill, but you’re still keeping yours.”
Cassius’s jaw flickered. “I can’t tell you what’s going on with the prince.”
Thalia let out another bitter laugh. “Don’t you see that this is hopeless, Cassius? We cannot hope to continue on. To—to be something without trust. And trust does not form from lies.” Thalia stepped back toward the fire. “You should go. Before my mother finds you.”
“No.”
“Don’t make this harder than it is, Cassius. Just leave—”
“Not without you.”
Thalia stared at him, watching the rise and fall of his chest. The way he seemed to strain against his doublet.
“Did you not believe me when I said I was still in love with you?” Cassius’s voice rose. “Did you not think that the idea of leaving here, of returning to face whatever awaits me in Vaccarium, is less terrifying than the thought of you not being by my side?”
“Cass—”
He shook his head. “If you wish to stay here, then I will stay with you.”
Anger flared in Thalia’s gut. “My mother will kill you, Cassius. Don’t you get that?”
“Do you not realize that I’m a dead man without you anyways?” Thalia sucked in a breath as he closed the distance between them. “Do you not think I didn’t die the moment I had to flee your presence? Do you not think that I don’t die every time I’m not near you? When I’m forced to be away from you?”
Cassius’s rough hands cupped her cheek. “I have died every day since that night. Since the moment I was turned. I’ve been a walking corpse, wandering around in hopes that maybe one day … one day you’d finally forgive me.”
“Cass—”
“I die every time you look at me, because I know you see me. Through the pain of my betrayal. Through the secrets. You’re not afraid of the monster inside me.
The thought of you, even far away, is the only thing that has kept this new life bearable.
Your presence. Your essence. It consumes me more than the taste of blood.
It drives me more than the air I breathe.
I’d rather take a stake to my own heart than be parted from you again. ”
Thalia stared up at him. His eyes glowed, his hands gripping her face as though it were an anchor. “I would rather face whatever dark death awaits me,” she whispered, throat tight, “than spend this life without you.”
She surged upward, her mouth colliding with his.
Thalia opened for him, her arms threading around his neck as he tugged her against him. She died and was reborn, each stroke of his tongue igniting the embers she’d let burn to ash.
His hands were on her bare back, traveling up to her shoulders, his calluses rough as he tugged the straps of her gown down.
Her bare breasts peaked, and she fisted a hand in his hair as he bent his head, mouth closing around her nipple.
She groaned as his teeth scraped, setting her nerve endings sparking. Her heart pounded in her chest, and his hands pulled the rest of her gown down until it pooled at her feet.
His fingers pressed into her hips, pulling her against him. His clothing frayed against her heated skin.
Her fingers scrambled over his doublet. He only pulled away for a moment so she could yank it over his head before his lips met hers again.
They were a tangle of teeth and limbs.
Thalia hit the edge of her mattress and she sank down, Cassius following. She couldn’t get enough of him. Couldn’t get over the feeling of his hands running over her skin.
She shivered, his thumb swirling up the inside of her thigh. She sucked in a breath, waiting.
“What do you want?” he whispered, his lips pressing into the innermost portion of her leg.
She nearly whimpered. “You.”
Thalia could have sworn he grinned before his lips closed over her. She moaned, hips bucking as he sucked her into his mouth.
His strong hand splayed over her bare stomach, forcing her hips from moving.
“Gods, you taste like a dream. Just like I remembered,” Cassius rumbled. Then he pushed two fingers inside her.
Thalia cried out, the sharp pain slipping into pleasure as he worked her with his mouth and fingers.
She came hard and fast, her legs curling around his shoulders. He laughed, lifting his head, then he gently unstrapped her shoes.
Thalia’s lungs rose and fell in heavy pants as he unbuckled his trousers, and her mouth dried out as he sprang free. He fisted his cock in his hand, slowly tugging it. Thalia nearly came again at the sight.
Her heated gaze lifted to his. “Get over here. Now.”
He chuckled. “Of course, Princess.” Cassius crawled over her, kissing up the length of her body, his tongue wet and hot. He hovered above her. “Take off your jewelry.”
Thalia slid the arm cuff off, then took off her earrings. She grabbed the comb from her hair and hissed when the sharp prongs pricked her finger.
A droplet of blood welled brighter than a diamond.
Cassius took her hand in his gently, and she didn’t protest as her finger slipped into his mouth.
Thalia shivered as his tongue swept over her finger, sucking lightly. But he didn’t bite her, just let her blood fill his mouth.
She swallowed as he finished, his eyes glowing, face slightly rippling. “Let me see you,” she got out.
Cassius paused, eyes scanning hers, searching for any ounce of fear. Then he changed. His skin sank into his skull, black veins slithering beneath his flesh, eyes burning brighter than the moon.
She cupped his face, feeling the hollowed cheekbones. “You do not scare me,” she whispered, pressing her lips to his. Cassius shuddered against her mouth as she pulled away, his skin slowly returning to normal.
“I want to know what it tastes like,” she said quietly.
Cassius froze, his pupils nearly devouring the ring of his irises. “Are you sure?”
She nodded, sitting up. Cassius sat back as she grabbed her discarded hairpiece. She took his hand in hers, twisting it so his palm faced up. He didn’t react as she pricked his thumb with the prong.
A droplet welled, then she slowly brought his hand to her mouth.
Cassius made a low noise in the back of his throat as her lips closed around his thumb. His blood hit her tongue, a mixture of copper and salt and something else. Something sweetened like a tart berry, and she sucked him deeper into her mouth.
“Fuck, Thalia,” he whispered as she fell back against the bed, her tongue running all over the rough pad of his thumb. Thalia’s hands wrapped around his arm, holding him to her.
“Thalia?” Her name was a question, one she knew the answer to. She nodded, and he seemed to shudder.
A sharp sting sliced along her fingertip.
Her eyes closed as he took her finger once more in his mouth, moaning as he gently sucked at her skin.
Thalia sucked on his thumb harder, and his own answering groan accompanied hers. The little bit of his blood was overwhelming her senses, making her light and dizzy.
He pulled his hand away from her mouth, and she made a noise of protest—until he took the hand he’d been sucking on and wound their fingers together, letting them rest by her head.
“I would gladly die a thousand deaths …” he whispered, his lips bright with her blood. Thalia groaned when he nudged her entrance. “… if it meant that I got to do this. If it meant I could be with you. You make all of this worth it.”
Thalia’s eyes rolled back as he pushed inside her, her fingers tightening around his. “And I’ll never get sick of this. The feeling of you. The taste of your blood.”
Thalia’s hips lifted as an invitation, and he plunged deep inside her.
“The way you’re so fucking wet for me, I can hardly think.”
Thalia’s core tightened as he withdrew, plunging deep inside her once more. She could hardly stand it—the feel of him inside her. How he filled and stretched her as if she had no ending or beginning. It was simply them. Their bodies entwined, fitting into places they’d both thought were forgotten.
Cassius’s hips rolled, his strokes coming harder, faster.
Thalia let go of his hand so she could haul his mouth to hers. Her blood on his mouth had her moaning, her tongue stroking with as much fervor as his cock.
“Cassius,” she groaned.
His fingers tightened around her waist and he pulled back, sitting on his heels, bringing her with him. She cried out as he reached a deeper angle, pleasure spearing straight to her core.
“Say it again.” His rough voice scraped up her neck. He thrust upward just as she sank down and nearly wept at the building pressure, at the bliss that hummed just along the edges of her mind.
“Cassius.”
He grunted, his hands tightening on her thighs, his chest brushing against her aching nipples.
“Fuck, Cassius,” she got out. She grabbed his hand, shoving his thumb back into her mouth, craving the taste of him one more time just as he hit a spot so deep inside her she couldn’t take it.
She screamed around his thumb, her tongue lapping up his blood, and he roared, his pleasure chasing hers.
Their bodies slowed, their breaths hard and heavy. Cassius removed his hand from her mouth, but it didn’t go far. He cradled her face, forcing her eyes to his.
They didn’t say anything, just stared at each other, as he stayed buried deep inside her.
Her eyes shone, and words gathered on her tongue, but they couldn’t push past her tight throat.
Cassius’s eyes softened, and he kissed her lightly. “Did you like the taste of my blood?” he whispered. Thalia nodded, and his hands slid down her arms. “There is one good thing about me turning.”
“What’s that?”
His eyes turned positively wicked. “I can do this all night.”
Thalia’s aching core turned molten, and she kissed him again, the taste of his blood still a tart cherry on her tongue.