Chapter 2
TWO
Cyanna
Avoidance. It’d been her best friend. It’d been the best way for Cyanna to get through this place she was stuck in.
A place where her marriage was stuck in limbo.
Did she have a hand in it? Yes. For the last two years, she lived in regret.
Not one of not making the right choice, one of even entertaining the idea that Damari would be something worth having and holding.
But it was the remnants of the miscarriage that was sending her brain on a loop. Nothing like finding out you were pregnant and your husband telling you about bad timing and that he couldn’t support a child he actively helped make.
Cyanna sat at her desk, mindlessly twirling the diamond ring around her finger.
Her eyes trained on the screen, watching the match.
Her talking to Karys might’ve been far and few in between, but she never missed this.
The moment to watch him shine. The moment to see him in his element.
She loved it. From the time his coordination was worth a damn and he’d annoy her with the ball kicking down the street, purposely tripping her up sometimes – Cyanna never missed it.
She watched his six-foot-six body block the high-powered kicks coming his way.
Los Oceania was being hosted in Port East, and it was the first time they’d made it so far in the post-season.
As badly as she wanted to be there, being there meant she’d crumble.
Karys had always had the ability to look past all the things she distracted everyone with and see her heart.
Cyanna’s heart was broken and her esteem was low.
A broken heart she knew how to mend. Making herself feel like she deserved more was the part she couldn’t let him see.
That moment at her reception two years ago played on a loop.
“If this shit don’t work…call me.”
Calling would admit defeat. Calling would admit she fucked up.
Calling him at three in the morning, alone in a house with the hospital paperwork soaked in tears, and Damari nowhere to be found almost told on her.
Instead, she told her best friend, the one God had designed for her, that she was wanted to hear his voice.
She wanted comfort. She wanted someone to hold her and tell her it’d be okay.
That one day she’d have a family of her own.
One day she’d be happy. But she swallowed what she needed like shards of glass and listened to him talk about the season, his expectations for himself, and endorsements.
Anytime he circled the conversation back to her, she’d dodge it.
Telling Karys that she’d lost a baby and her husband was out screwing whoever would’ve ended with him showing up and leaving in cuffs.
Her eyes bounced back and forth at the intensity until the game ended with two points for L.O. and a blocked goal for Port East. Silently, she cheered. Eyes prickling with tears as Karys ran into the middle of the field to celebrate with his team.
“Cyanna,” her secretary buzzed, entering the space. Jackie, an employee that had been with her since starting Brooks Haven Design Firm, walked into the room round belly first. “We got the go ahead to break ground for the Reynold’s project.”
Cyanna examined her, smiled faintly, and nodded. Turning the tv off, she shook the images of Karys’ smile away. “Oh good. Blueprints and permits are approved?”
“Yes, they are. And there’s one more inquiry you haven’t looked at yet,” Jackie chimed, taking a seat in the chair.
She was almost seven months along and was determined to work every day until she delivered.
While Cyanna was excited for her, it was a stark reminder that life had left her body, and she was unsure if she’d ever get that moment again.
Cyanna swiveled her desk chair to the screen of her computer and tapped a few buttons.
Brooks Haven was a company her father let fail.
Once Cyanna had her builder’s license, her degree for engineering, and her handful of certifications, she began the diligent work of rebuilding from nothing to something.
She was proud of it. From chasing clients to inquiries coming in by the dozens daily.
Too many projects to maintain, making this firm a luxury to be in business with.
Entering the portal, she found an inquiry from Hillcrest Holdings. They’d bought the block she used to live on and wanted to renovate all the houses. A noble quest, but did she have the time?
“Schedule a meeting and once I meet whoever this is, I’ll make my decision. Other than that, I think I’m done for the day. You get home and put your feet up,” Cyanna directed, logging out of her computer and grabbing her bag.
Jackie rubbed her belly and hummed. “Yeah, it’s been a long day. What’s the plan? Dinner with Damari? I haven’t blocked out any time for you two lately.”
She very rarely brought her personal life into her place of business.
She couldn’t, especially not now. This needed to be a place where she could escape the coldness of her home – the ice from the man she vowed forever with.
He didn’t like her and she could attest the same.
Now, all it came down to was pulling the plug and letting this finish its death.
“He’s made partner, I’m busy with this…time is scarce,” Cyanna shared, standing. “Get home safe, okay?”
It’d been three days apart and Damari was back home. Nothing had changed; he was in his bubble, and she was in hers. But there was something nagging at her. She stayed quiet once and forced herself into this hell of a life. Now, she needed to say something.
“Damari,” she buzzed, easing into his home office. His voice was a low rumble, but she was trained to hear everything. It was something she did on the nights he snuck out and back in. Inside, she knew he had someone else; she just couldn’t make herself find out.
“I already told you I’ll be at the appointment tomorrow.
Just have her busy. I got another year in this shit before I can divorce her and leave with something.
No. I don’t want you to say shit to her.
I’ll handle it…because she’s my wife and the least I can do is tell her I’m done with her.
If you tell her, you’re going to fuck this up for both of us,” Damari rumbled.
“I took the whole day off, I’ll be there.
I’ll tell her I have a business trip this weekend. I’m all yours.”
Was she surprised, no. Was she holding out hope that maybe there was something salvageable between the two of them and she could wake up from this nightmare?
Yes. One hundred percent yes. Because thinking and dreaming about another man who had never told her plainly that he wanted her was delusional.
And she was far too old to be living in delusion.
She didn’t expose herself. Cyanna wanted to see how far Damari was going to go to get something that was trusted to her.
The prenup her father had drafted years before his death for his daughter stated that in the event of alienation of affection, after three years, her spouse was entitled to half.
Even from his grave, he controlled her. Damari knew that document inside and out and assured her that he’d be true to her forever.
He also promised to keep his dick in the house but clearly, that too was a lie.
Cyanna inched out of the office, back up the stairs and into their bed.
She avoided Karys’ calls. Avoided the social media posts about him and his girlfriend.
Avoided it all. It was either that or lose the last piece of herself she was barely holding on to.
What she didn’t know; the tighter she held on to it, the more everything would slip away from her. Her time to surrender was approaching.