Chapter 1
ONE
Hollie
Present Day - June
My phone dinged with a text message as I rifled through my dresser for a suitable outfit.
Finding a soft pink blouse, I shook out the folds and slipped it on over my white lace bra and tucked the hem into the front of my jeans.
Going to the bathroom, I grabbed a claw clip out of the drawer and pinched my wild curls into a knot on the back of my head.
Giving myself a once over in the full-length mirror, I turned side to side then pulled out the tuck of my shirt.
Garrett always said that habit was weird and out of style anyway.
He was usually right about those things.
Letting a long sigh escape from my lips, I shuffled to my phone and tapped the screen.
Jackie
Are you going to tell them?!
I rolled my eyes, stifling a groan.
Me
Idk I guess it depends on how everything goes.
Jackie
It’s been EIGHT months, Hollie. EIGHT!!!!! You have to stop making excuses.
Me
I know. I’ll tell them.
Jackie
You better, because I have no problem whatsoever ripping the bandaid off.
I tossed my phone onto my fluffy white duvet and flopped down beside it, finding no comfort in the way the down floofed up around my head.
I never looked forward to our family Zoom calls, but now I’d have Jackie side-eyeing me through the screen and harassing me via text to follow through on my promise.
The fact that Jackie, of all people, knew the details of my life was an accident.
She wanted me to spill my guts to the family, but climbing Mount Everest sounded preferable to baring my soul.
But she would never understand that, because her relationship with our parents was vastly different from mine.
Plus, everyone had remained blissfully ignorant about the details of my life for over a decade—so why say something now?
The cooing of a bird drew my eyes to the all-glass french doors leading to the balcony, where the soft sunset bathed the white outdoor furniture with a warm, honey-orange glow. That balcony used to look so inviting—romantic and evocative. But bad memories could taint any picturesque place.
My daughters were downstairs, watching a movie on the couch which allowed me to have some time undisturbed.
Walking down the hallway, I glanced over the bannister at them, chiding Izzy for the high volume.
With a sigh, I strode down the hall to the spare bedroom where I plopped into my desk chair and propped my phone against a cup full of pens.
Then, I pinched my cheeks and plastered a smile on my tired face.
With shaking hands, I joined the Zoom meeting.
To no one’s surprise, I was the last to arrive. Everyone was present, already chatting and getting their mics turned on. A chorus of greetings filled the line and I pretended to fumble with my microphone for a solid thirty seconds.
Oh, I dreaded this so much.
I’d practically raised some of these people—literally changed their diapers—but I felt like a stranger, like the real Hollie was out to lunch and I was only a fill in.
My smile faltered. “Hey, guys. Good to see you all.”
Ben, the fifth of the Thompson children, appeared to be sitting in the Anderson Academic Commons at Denver University, and a tiny, quiet stab of jealousy shot through me. He sat closer to his phone screen, squinting. “Holls, you look like you need some caffeine.”
I shook my head and laughed for everyone else’s sake. “I always need caffeine.”
He smiled and lifted a water bottle to his lips.
Mom, sitting at her kitchen table with Estelle, my youngest sister, tsked and defended me, surprisingly. “It’s called having young kids, Ben.” Even though she smiled, a crease remained between her brows. She looked worried.
My eyes flicked across everyone’s camera.
Dad sat in the front seat of his semi. Peter had his wife, Sarah, tucked beneath his arm on the couch.
Jackie sat by the pool with dark glasses over her eyes.
I wasn’t sure where Bea was, but Tag was with her.
She had her head against his shoulder, even though his face wasn’t in the shot.
A slight frown tugged at my face. Bea did not look good. She had deep circles under her eyes and pale skin. Her smile stretched thin, hollow. Her normal bubbly self had yet to utter a word.
Everyone chatted for a few minutes, giving each other basic updates.
When it was my turn, I just talked about the girls, which was what I always did.
All the while, I wondered who had called the meeting.
We did Zoom calls every few months to keep the family connected, but usually the girls were present for the few meetings we attended.
But this call, according to Mom’s text in the group chat was an emergency, but so far, no one had said anything warranting that claim.
Then it was Bea’s turn to speak.
“Well,” she held the phone a little further away so we could get a good view of both their faces. The two times I’d met Tag, we only exchanged a few words. He seemed very reserved, but he was attentive to Bea and incredibly handsome. Bea smiled up at him before saying, “We have some news.”
All of us drew a collective breath.
Those words coming from a newlywed couple usually meant one thing.
“Mom and Dad already know and I wanted to tell you guys face to face, but since I can’t travel right now, Zoom will have to do.”
Jackie ripped her glasses off her face, her eyes wide. Sarah’s hand already rested over her mouth. Estelle’s palms cupped her cheeks. We all knew what was coming.
Bea hesitated, a beat of uncertainty in her expression. “I’m pregnant.”
Her next words were drowned out by a series of exclamations ranging from maniacal laughter to wild shrieking.
Jackie jerked forward, her phone clattering to the ground.
Estelle started crying. Peter shook his head.
As for me, I sat in stunned silence with my jaw hanging open. They got married nine weeks ago.
Nine weeks.
A nervous smile spread across her face as Tag tucked his arm around her.
“Atta boy, Tag.” Ben gave a slow clap of approval. “That’s a man on a mission right there.”
Tag’s gaze cut away from the camera, an instant blush rising to his cheeks.
Bea scolded him with a weak laugh. “Ben, shut up!”
“No freaking way.” Jackie picked up the phone, bringing it close to her face. “How dare you tell us like this! I can’t hug you!”
“Congratulations, but, uh, that was a little fast.” Peter scratched the back of his head, the disbelief evident on his face. “How did that happen?”
I stifled a grimace at Peter’s response, feeling it came off insensitive.
Sarah elbowed him.
Ben sat forward and laced his fingers together, unable to let the opportunity pass. “Well, Peter, when a man loves a woman—”
“Benjamin.” My father gave Ben a gentle chide. “Cut it out.”
Laughing, Ben sat back from his camera with a smirk.
Estelle sniffed. “This is the happiest day of my life. I can’t believe I’m going to be an aunt again.”
“Congratulations you two,” I said. “Are you excited?”
“Very, but also…kind of scared?” Her smile wavered.
There was something she wasn’t saying. I could feel it.
Being the only one of my siblings with children, I continued, “I get that. It’s an intimidating change. How far along are you?”
“With the way they calculate it, they’re saying eleven weeks. But, this one is a honeymoon baby for sure.”
I nodded, familiar with the way practitioners counted weeks since the first day of last period.
Bea gave a sheepish smile. “My due date is actually your birthday, Hollie. Christmas Day.”
Even though my response was genuine and excited, I couldn’t help but be distracted by Peter’s camera.
He shook his head in agitation and their mic suddenly muted.
Of all people here, Peter should’ve been happy for Bea, even if their timeline didn’t seem smart to him.
Bea and Peter were so close. What was his problem?
Their camera turned off for a moment too.
Hopefully, Sarah was talking some sense into him.
“I take it you’ve seen a doctor then?” I asked.
“Uh, yeah. I’ve actually been to the doctor a lot of times.”
I frowned. “Uh oh. That doesn’t sound good.”
“I’m okay, but I’m way sicker than I imagined I would be.”
Peter’s camera flicked back on and everyone stilled in order to hear her.
A storm brewed in Peter’s eyes. “What kind of sick?”
“Like nausea and stuff?” Jackie asked.
“Yeah, nausea.” Bea took a shuddering breath. “But I’m also throwing up a good bit.”
Ben tsked. “Everyone throws up when they’re pregnant, right?”
“I didn’t.” I chimed in with a shrug.
Estelle asked, “So is it normal sickness?”
“No, not really.”
Mom shook her head but stayed silent. I narrowed my eyes, searching Mom and Bea’s faces through the screen.
Bea’s response irritated Tag to the point of finally talking.
His drawl filled the silence. “She’s gonna downplay what’s happenin’ so people don’t make a fuss.
” He took the phone from her, centering it on his face.
“She wanted to deliver the news face to face but had to cancel her plans ‘cause she’s been in and out of the emergency room.”
We all gasped. Mom and Dad nodded—they knew.
A chorus of questions came.
Bea rested her head on Tag’s shoulder again as he tried to answer them all as best he could. “It’s not mornin’ sickness or normal at all. It’s something called, um…” He floundered for a second. “Hyper…” He glanced down at Bea so she could fill in.
“Hyperemesis gravidarum.”
My stomach dropped. When I went to a new mom’s class before Izzy was born, I met a mom who had that. That mom told me it felt like slowly starving to death. Or maybe I was misremembering. For Bea’s sake, I hoped I was.
“Yeah,” Tag continued, “we call it HG. She’s sick ten, twenty, sometimes thirty times a day and has lost a ton of weight. She’s so weak she can barely walk around the house anymore. When she gets really dehydrated, we have to take her to the ER for fluids.”