Chapter 49 Lexie #2
His beautiful dimples deepen. “Yeah. You handed me my dropped headphones and asked for directions. I wasn’t in the mood to deal with people, so I tried to get rid of you as quickly as possible.
But then I looked up, and fuck, Lexie…” he drags his hands down his face.
“You had on these pink Converse, cut-off shorts, and a St. Ben’s t-shirt.
Your hair was in this long braid all the way down to your waist. And I swear—the way the sun hit you, like some kind of firestorm, the way it pulled out the green flecks in your eyes, the way that your freckles were darker from the summer—it stopped me.
Everything just… fucking stopped. I didn’t care about being late to class, or my dad, or even the heat.
I couldn’t see anything but you. And I swear to Christ, Lexie, I honestly thought I was going to pass out.
You were so goddamn beautiful. But it was more than that.
You had this pure, angelic innocence to you and…
I knew that was it. I fell so fucking hard. ”
I can’t believe he remembers all this, when all I remember from that time was how worried I was that I’d get lost on campus.
Theo shifts to face me. He still looks hesitant to touch me, like he’s scared that if he moves too quickly, I’ll run.
But I know in this moment, I will never run.
I want to stay locked inside his orbit forever.
Nothing has felt more whole or complete than when I’m with him.
Sitting on a picnic table, wrapped in his arms in my tiny apartment, or feeling him inside me, he is the glue that adheres my broken, jagged pieces together.
“Anna told you everything, didn’t she?”
I nod.
His beautiful soft brown eyes bore into mine. “You have to understand—there was so much at stake. It felt like there were no good options left.”
I fan my fingers across his tattooed arm, a quiet reassurance to him that I’m here—that I understand.
It’s the first time I’ve touched him since he showed up, and his skin is warm, heavenly, under my fingers.
“I love your loyalty to Annabelle. You’ve been the one constant in her life, and I’d never ask you to give that up.
I know how much you mean to each other.”
He tightens his grip on my hand. “I need you to know that since the beginning, it’s always been you. I’ve done so many fucked-up things in my life, made difficult choices because of it, but I keep coming back to the same truth—you are mine, and I am yours.”
The tears that were clinging for dear life under my eyelids, release and roll down my cheeks, and I swipe them away, my emotions a mess.
“I am…” He hesitates, pain flickering across his face.
“Sorry. For lying to you for so long. I should’ve told you right away about what I did at school.
But I was terrified you’d leave and after all these years, I’d just gotten you back.
It was selfish and so fucking wrong. But I swear, with everything in me, I will never, ever lie to you again. ”
Theo isn’t someone who apologizes lightly. I know that when he says it, he means it—and warmth spreads through me.
“When you told me yesterday, at the house, that you love me, it… it broke me,” he says as he tucks a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “No one has ever made me feel that exposed. I’ve never let them. I wanted to say so much back to you. I just… couldn’t.”
Gentle fingers brush away the tears streaming down my cheeks, and I lean into the warmth of his touch.
Something like hope starts to nestle in my heart as years of uncertainty, months of love and pain, feelings of being inadequate, vanish with each passing moment.
“What did you want to say to me?” my voice cracks.
He shifts and kneels in front of me until our faces are close.
So many unfamiliar emotions move through his creased eyes.
Hope tangled with uncertainty. Fear threaded through love.
Apologies wrapped up in quiet promises. My chin trembles.
Somewhere deep in my soul, I feel everything he’s trying to say.
“I fucking love you, Lexie. I love you.” He cups my face and leans closer.
“My world has always revolved around you. I thought I could let you go. Back then, now, for years, I thought I could leave, but I never could. You are both my biggest weakness and my greatest strength.” My tears come freely now, traveling down my face and onto his hands.
“You have no idea how much I regret everything—getting you expelled, the way I acted, letting you go. I was a fucking idiot, and I wasted seven years of our lives apart.” His gaze sharpens, pleading but steady.
“If you’ll let me, I swear to God I’ll spend the rest of my life fighting for you, proving to you that you belong with me, that we…
belong together. I’ll show you every day how sorry I am. ”
A beat passes as I hold my breath.
“If… you’ll have me.”
And I cave. A choking sob breaks loose as I wrap my arms around him, pressing my face into his shoulder. My heart feels like it’s been revived. It was nearly destroyed, but it didn’t stop. It’s still beating, still fighting, still clinging on with everything it has to the belief that I am enough.
I’m broken. But Theo will heal me.
I will heal me.
His shirt absorbs my tears. His strong arms hold me as tight as a corset, his heart pounds against my chest, his shaky breaths intertwine with mine.
So much time passes where I just let him hold me, until my brain, my body, my heart, accept that he is here with me and refuses to let go.
He’s stroking my hair, he’s whispering in my ear, he’s supporting me when I feel like I’m going to collapse.
Finally, after the sobs quiet, and my breaths even, I pull back and dash my gaze against his eyes.
“What would you have done if I wasn’t here? ”
His thumbs swipe off the rest of my tears, and he presses his forehead into mine. “I would’ve burned down the world to find you.”
My heart soars like it’s gotten its wings. I cup my fingers against his cheeks, the stubble tickling my fingertips, and sigh. “I love you, too.”
He pulls me in for a kiss. It’s nothing like the possessive, urgent kisses from before.
This one is unhurried—intentional, deliberate.
His lips move against mine like I’m the air he needs, the lifeline he’s been waiting for.
He kisses me as though he’s releasing himself of the past and welcoming me into his future.
I kiss him back with forgiveness, with the promise of tomorrow, with the quiet certainty that I am here, now, with him in this moment, where we’re meant to be.
Somewhere along the blurred lines of history, revenge, and ownership, of hope, sorrow, and love, our worlds collided. What I thought was a game turned into reality. What I thought was a trap became the truth.
Our love. It’s messy and impracticable and deeply imperfect.
But it’s ours.
And it’s worth fighting for.