Chapter 25 #2
After a little while of getting to know this group, exchanging numbers, and verifying that I am, in fact, part of the group text, Brit and I make our way back to where our men are.
“See? I wouldn’t steer you wrong,” Brit says as we join our guys.
I can hear that the conversation is much of the same, just with new people. No one actually asks Xander how he is. Not just regarding the knee but in general. No Hey, how have you been? or anything that would resemble a friendly chat.
It sounds . . . predatory.
And the longer I listen to it, the more it fucking pisses me off.
“You’re quiet,” Xander says as he lifts my hand to his lips and kisses my knuckles. We’re in the car on the way back to his place.
“I’m just processing,” I reply.
But that’s only part of the truth.
I’m so irritated.
And proud. So fucking proud because before the night was out, the charity raised over five million dollars for the children’s hospital, and that’s a huge fucking deal. I couldn’t have been happier to sit by his side all night because what he and Cooper accomplish with this every year is astounding.
We’re still quiet when we pull to a stop at our building, and Xander helps me out of the car and inside to the elevator. Once the doors close, I step out of my shoes, but before I can pick them up, Xander does it for me.
“How are your feet?” he asks with a half smile.
“They’ve been better.” I groan as I wiggle my toes. “But the shoes are pretty.”
Finally, the elevator opens, and Xander leads me to his door, unlocks and opens it, and we walk inside.
I’m so freaking keyed up.
I stride to the windows and look outside, and when I turn around, I see that Xander has shed his jacket and is rolling his sleeves.
“Talk to me,” he says seriously. “You hated it. You hate me. What the fuck is going on in your head?”
I shake my head. “I didn’t hate it, and I could never hate you. I’m so damn proud of you. The whole thing was beautiful and fun, and I can’t believe how much money you raised. It’s awesome.”
He frowns and crosses his arms over his chest. “Okay. Why are you pissed off? Listen, I’m sorry about Bridget. I wasn’t even thinking about her, and didn’t consider—”
“You think I’m jealous?” I tilt my head to the side. “Of her. Jesus.”
I pace away from him and then back again.
“I don’t give two shits about that woman or any of the others who tried to slip you their numbers tonight.
Which yeah, I saw. You’re sexy, you’re successful, so I get it.
Of course, it goes against girl code when I’m standing right there, so it’s an asshole move, but whatever. I don’t care, Xander.”
“You sound like you care.”
“You don’t want those girls. I’m the one who woke you up with your cock inside me. I’m the one who gets so much of you. Only me. I’m yours, and you’re mine, and I’m not forgetting that.”
His shoulders sag in relief.
“Great. Then why—”
“It pisses me off,” I continue, still pacing, “that none of those people tonight gives a shit about you. They pretend. They smile and kiss your ass, but all they want to know is when you can play again. When you can go back to doing what makes them money, or gets them views, or whatever the fuck. No one asked you how you are. Not really. It’s all so surface, so ‘What can you do for me.’”
I shake my head and ball my hands into fists.
“You’re my person, and it fucking enrages me that you’re just a commodity to them.
And don’t think for a second that I didn’t see your face when they’d ask.
I know you were thinking to yourself, ‘What the fuck’ and ‘When will this end?’ You’re an amazing, gorgeous, funny, wonderful human being, and I love that I’m one of the few who really knows you, but a lot of those people are supposed to be your friends, and they’re not. ”
He’s walking my way, slowly, letting me get it all out because I can’t stop it at this point.
“How can they only see this guy on the ice? You’re so much more than that.
You’re the man who buys me fuzzy blankets and goes all-out crazy cat dad for Cally and loves his family.
And it fills me with so much pride to stand next to you, knowing just how fantastic you are.
And at the same time, it pisses me off that none of those people cares about who you really are, and only give a shit about what you can do for them.
Who’s supposed to be protecting you, Xander?
Your coaches, your PR people, your agent were all there tonight, and no one said a fucking word to any of them. ”
By now, he’s standing just an arm’s length away from me, and I’m shaking with indignation.
“Never again,” I tell him, my voice firm. “Because from here on out, I’m with you, and I will not be quiet again while those people act like idiots.”
He frames my face and brushes his thumbs over my cheeks.
“Baby, it was a good night. People just don’t know what to say.”
“Then they shouldn’t say anything at all.”
He brushes my hair over my shoulder and cups the back of my neck as he brings his forehead down to mine.
“God, I love you,” he says, making me stop short.
“Every glorious thing about you. I’m fine, Red.
I had a good night. And I love you for wanting to have my back, but I don’t want those people to know me the way you do anyway.
They only get that small piece of me. Coop, my family gets much more. But you, and only you, get everything.”
Tears fill my eyes and I swallow hard.
“I love you too.”
“Come on.” He takes my hand in his. “I’ve been dying to get you out of that dress to see what’s under it.”
“Um.”
He lifts an eyebrow.
“There’s nothing under it.”
“Jesus Christ, it’s good I didn’t know that earlier.”