Chapter 9 Hudson
Every muscle in my body wants to run after Mira.
To scream, “This isn’t what it looks like.
” But I know better than to show my hand to Katherine.
After last night’s declaration, I’m certain that if she gets wind that something is going on between Mira and me, she’ll do everything she can to ruin it.
No, it’s better to bide my time, approach Mira when we can be alone and talk this through.
Because she’s here, in Wyoming, staying in my room.
“Well, that was weird,” Katherine says, opening the closet and laying out dresses on the bed.
“You’re the one who made it weird with that PDA comment,” I argue, trying to keep my voice steady. “Making it sound as if we have to restrain ourselves all weekend.”
“I always have to restrain myself around you,” she purrs, stripping off her top.
Instinctively, I turn my back to her. “Can you change in the bathroom please?”
“It’s not like you haven’t seen it before.”
“But our guest hasn’t. What if Mira walked back in here?” I say, in an attempt to utilize a few of the principles I read up on to prep for my upcoming position. Be firm. Stay vigilant. Create boundaries.
“Jeez. Lighten up.” There’s annoyance in her voice as she walks across the room, removing a garment bag out of the closet and tossing it onto the bed. “Your mom wants you to wear this tonight.”
I keep my back to her as I unzip the bag. Inside is a long-sleeved shirt, brown suit jacket, and matching pants. It’s exactly the type of outfit Susan used to put me in for grade school photos. While everyone else was wearing dinosaur t-shirts, I looked like a Baby Brooks Brothers campaign.
“I’m not wearing that,” I argue.
Besides the fact that it’s going to be over a hundred degrees, we’re having dinner on a boat, not at a Michelin-star restaurant.
“I don’t care what you wear,” she sneers, “but do you really want Susan on your back?”
Considering my mother is one of the main reasons I agreed to this fake-dating ruse in the first place, not going along with her predetermined, color-coordinated outfits will only draw more attention to our lie.
And then I remember that the only reason I am supposed to wear this stupid fucking outfit is so Susan can have family photos.
Photos I’m going to have to smile and pose in, in front of Mira.
So much for waiting it out. I need to talk to her now. To explain the situation. But Katherine blocks my exit, her back exposed as a yellow dress hangs against her shoulders.
“Zip please,” she orders, her sharp blue eyes piercing me as she glances over her shoulder. But serving Katherine isn’t my job anymore.
“Do it yourself,” I say, and open the door to go find Mira.
I do a full sweep of the Big Barn and the outdoor patios before making my way up to the main cabins, but there’s no sight of her.
I consider the real possibility that she left.
That she went straight to Meredith and quit.
That my inability to have hard conversations has not only fucked up my chance of happiness but made Mira lose out on a gig.
I’m riddled with guilt as Meredith calls for me from her perch on the porch.
“Hey, stranger,” she shouts, waving me over. “I’m still trying to get rid of some of this whiskey if you want a drink.”
“I’m sticking to water today,” I reply, my body still processing all the liquor from this week.
“Lightweight,” she jabs as I crane my neck to survey the front lawn.
“You looking for someone?”
“Uh, Mira actually. You haven’t seen her around, have you?”
Meredith shakes her head. “Why? Is everything okay?”
“Oh, yeah. Just wanted to let her know she left her key.”
I hold up my own keychain, dangling it for effect.
“How did she take the room change? I meant to tell her, but with everything going on I got sidetracked.”
“She’s all settled in,” I lie, guilt prickling against my skin.
This is all my fault. I should have told her about Katherine ages ago. And I should have never volunteered her to stay in my room.
Since my quick thinking got me into this mess, maybe it can get me out. “Do you think I could take a peek at your wedding binder?” I ask, hoping that there might be a willing party that would switch with Mira.
Meredith’s eyebrows arch and she crosses her arms defensively. “If this request is coming from your mother, you can assure her that I have no intention of creating a seating chart, no matter how many times she insists that it helps the flow of the room or whatever.”
“I’m here on my own accord. I swear.” I hold up my hand against my chest as if taking an oath. Meredith stares at me quizzically, determining if I’m to be trusted. And I hate that after losing her parents, Susan is the mother-in-law she is inheriting.
“It’s upstairs in our room, on the dresser.”
“Thanks, Mere,” I say, giving her shoulder a grateful squeeze as I pass by her and into the cabin.
I find the wedding binder exactly where she said. The contents are a disorganized mess. Illustrated drawings of bouquets are stuck between menu options and maps for hiking trails. Magazine clippings of dresses are glued onto cardstock and extra invitations are stuffed into a plastic sleeve.
I pass a section about the proper permits for the wedding ceremony at the Tetons and see that their application date is from two weeks ago.
After working alongside the National Parks Service most of my life, I’m very aware that it can take months to get documents like this processed.
Without a proper permit, they could be denied entry, fined, or face federal charges.
Considering I do not see the actual permit number listed, I make a mental note to call in a favor to expedite the process.
Flipping to the next page I find the room assignments.
Not only is every room accounted for, but every couch, futon, and cot is taken up by a cousin or a plus-one.
There really is nowhere to move Mira. I’ve just set the binder down when Grant barges in, doing a double take when he finds me sitting at the vanity.
“Looking for makeup tips or considering a career in wedding planning?” he jabs, and I can’t believe there was a time in my life when I actually wanted a brother.
“Trying to keep Susan off your back,” I argue, knowing that is the one thing we can agree on.
“She’s already pissed off the staff,” Grant says, rummaging through the closet. “I swear if she racks up extra charges I’m sending her the bill.”
“As if your dad wouldn’t pay for it.”
Unlike my own father, who made me work for everything, George has been using his Black Card to fix Grant’s problems for as long as I can remember, facilitating his inability to grow up.
“Katherine said you were being an asshole lately, but I really see it now.”
“Better than being one my whole life,” I snipe back, irritated that Katherine would run off and complain about me, when she’s the one who wants to pretend that everything is perfect between us.
I’m already plotting an over-the-top breakup scene on the boat when Meredith rushes into the room.
“Babe,” she says, frazzled, “your mom is blowing up my phone.”
She holds out the screen towards the both of us as paragraph-long messages come in one after the other.
“She’s demanding to give a toast at the wedding, since she wasn’t asked to do it at the rehearsal,” Meredith sighs, taking a seat on the bed.
“This is ridiculous. No one is speaking at the wedding. That’s why we decided to do it at the rehearsal.
I just wanted our day to be fun, no pressure. Now I don’t even know what to say.”
“It doesn’t matter what you say,” Grant says, slipping on a pair of leather loafers. “Susan’s going to do what she wants either way; all you can do is go along with it.” He hands her a bottle of huckleberry vodka from the dresser. “My advice, have a drink and try not to think about it.”
I watch as she unscrews the cap and takes a swig directly from the bottle before handing it over to me.
If my problems could be dulled so easily, I’d drink the whole bottle, but blowing off steam for me involves disappearing into the wilderness for a few days with nothing but my backpack and a map. But even the best trails in the world can’t assuage my fear that Mira may never speak to me again.