10. Lyra
Chapter 10
Lyra
I wake to the sound of steady breathing in my ear, and the realization hits me—last night wasn’t a dream. Nyx really did show up here and is still sleeping beside me. Carefully, I flip over to face him. His eyes snap open, and a slow smile curves his lips.
“Good morning, Princess,” he murmurs.
“Does Colton know you’re here?” I ask before I can consider their impact. I almost regret asking as I watch his expression change. His smile disappears, replaced by a sudden seriousness as he rolls onto his back to stare at the ceiling.
“No,” he answers after a heavy pause. His voice is flat, a stark contrast to the warmth of just a moment ago.
“I’m glad you came,” I say, attempting to ease the tension. Perhaps this is a sign that I should spend time with Nyx without lingering on Colton, to genuinely explore the possibility of a future with him. I do care for him, and if he’s truly who I’m destined to be with, accepting that might be the next step.
He turns back to face me, skepticism shadowing his features. “Don’t play with me,” he says softly, his hand reaching out to stroke my arm gently, a hint of caution in his touch.
“I’m not,” I assure him sincerely, my voice steady. “I am glad you came. I...” My words falter as I search for the right way to express my tangled feelings without hurting him further.
“You wish it had been him instead,” he says sharply, full of hurt and accusation.
I shake my head. “That’s not what I was going to say,” I insist, meeting his gaze directly. “I’m trying to figure things out, Nyx. It’s complicated, and I’m torn. But right now, I’m here with you, and I’m honestly glad for your company.” My voice softens, hoping to convey my genuine feelings and the complexity of the emotions I’m wrestling with.
“You know Colton doesn’t appreciate your dark magic. Ever since you first unleashed it, he looks at you as if you unsettle him. Haven’t you noticed?”
I can’t help but frown. Indeed, I’ve observed Colton growing distant, his cautiousness apparent whenever I wield my powers. But we were finally having a good moment together before the attack in the Lamia Realm. He let his shields down, and I felt his feelings for me.
“He’s being protective and doesn’t want me to lose control again,” I defend, trying to rationalize his concerns.
“I would never look at you the way he does. To me, you’re incredibly beautiful and sexy, especially when you’re embracing your dark magic,” Nyx counters smoothly, his tone dropping to a soothing murmur as he reaches out to tuck a lock of hair behind my ear. “Lyra, I’ve felt a shift between us even before the council meeting. That kiss... I know you felt its power too. We are destined, you and I. Together, we can govern Eguina, and I will stand by you as your beacon, ensuring you never succumb to the darkness fully. I’ll support your growth in dark magic, encourage its use under your reign, and you’ll always be safe because you’ll have me by your side.”
I look down at his chest, grappling with the emotions that his declaration stirs within me. The room is heavy with silence, hanging thick between us, until finally he breaks it.
“I love you, Lyra. I will die loving you,” he confesses, his voice a fervent whisper that fills the space around us. “You are the only one I see, the only one I yearn for. My heart is irrevocably yours, whether you choose to claim it or not.” The intensity in his voice is palpable, and it presses against the walls of my heart with an almost physical force.
His hand gently lifts my chin, compelling me to meet his stare. His eyes, fiercely glowing gray, hold mine in a gaze so intense that the world around us seems to fade. “You’re mine, and I will fight for you through all eternity because we are fated you and I,” he says with an unshakeable conviction.
He leans in close, his presence gentle yet commanding, and places a tender kiss on my forehead. Then he raises a hand to cup my face, his touch careful and filled with emotion. As his lips meet mine, the kiss is soft and gentle.
But when I kiss him back, returning his passion with my own, something shifts. He seems to lose control of his restraint. The kiss deepens, intensifying as if a dam has been broken, unleashing a torrent of pent-up emotions. His hands, firm, pull me closer, and I can feel the urgency and desire pouring from him.
He presses me back, rolling on top of me as the intensity escalates. Breaking the kiss, he cups my face, looking down at me with an expression that mixes desire with something deeper. “Fuck, you have no idea how long I’ve thought about this, about being inside you again,” he murmurs hoarsely then claims my mouth again with fervor.
His kiss is rough, filled with longing and urgency. He tugs at my shirt, pulling it up to grasp my breast. I gasp into his mouth as he squeezes my nipple, sending a sharp pulse of sensation through me.
He undoes his pants, and as I feel the firm press of him against my thigh. The shadows within me stir, purring with a dark pleasure, urging him to claim me here and now. A whimper escapes me into his kiss as he presses closer, pinning me beneath him. I feel the press of his cock at my entrance, but he pauses there, a part of me yearning for him to fuck me, while another, the more rational part, is seized by a sudden panic.
My heart thunders in my chest, but not from excitement—fear grips me. The realization hits hard: I’m terrified of making a monumental mistake, because deep down I love Colton. I thought I could bury those feelings, thought I could make it work with Nyx, but it doesn’t feel right. This feels so wrong.
As Nyx’s hand trails down my body, I catch it with my own, stopping him before he can go further. He pauses, his eyes searching mine, and I sense he feels the tension in my body stiffen.
“What’s wrong?” he asks.
“Nyx...I don’t think I can do this. I’m sorry,” I manage to breathe out, the words thick with emotion.
In an instant, he’s off the bed, pulling his pants up and pacing the room, a hardened expression on his face. I pull my shirt down and quickly get to my feet, attempting to bridge the sudden gulf between us. “Nyx—”
“Don’t speak, you fucking tease,” Nyx hisses, stopping in front of the wall and slamming his palm against it as he leans forward, his back to me.
The thud echoes in the suddenly cold room. I freeze, words failing me as the gravity of my actions hits hard. I’ve screwed things up so badly. I wanted a world where I could have them both—Colton’s love and Nyx’s friendship. Then I believed I was destined to be with Nyx, but now after learning they are brothers, a future with Colton seems possible again. Fuck, none of that matters because, as Drew said, deep down, I already know.
I’ve always known but have been trying everything possible to justify it. I love Colton, and he’s the one I want to be with, even if it could damn us all.
Nyx breaks into my spiraling thoughts. “It’s because of him, isn’t it?” he asks, his voice cutting through the tension.
“Yes,” I admit after a painful pause, my voice barely a whisper. “I’m in love with him. And Nyx, I love you too, but it’s not the same. I love you as a friend, and I want you to be happy.”
He starts to laugh, but it’s bitter and hollow, sending a chill down my spine. “Friends. You love me too and want to be friends. You’re both fucking dead to me,” he spits out, the venom in his words stinging.
I take a step toward him, my heart pounding. “Nyx, please. You said you would love me until you die. Can’t we talk about this?” I plead, desperate to salvage at least some part of what we had.
In an instant, his movements blur with speed, and suddenly my back is pressed against the wall. One of his hands is anchored above my head, firm against the cool surface, while the other grips my hip, holding me securely in place. His gaze narrows on me, intense and searching, and as he leans in close, I instinctively close my eyes.
Uncertainty swirls within me. His lips are so near I can feel his breath over them. I’m unsure if he’s going to try to kiss me again, then he shifts slightly, his breath warm against my ear, and he whispers, “Well, we both already know I’m a liar.”
By the time I open my eyes, he’s gone in a whirl of darkness as he channels.
Tears stream down my face uncontrollably as Chepi pokes his head out from under the covers at the edge of the bed. I try to lighten the mood with a tease, “Oh, nice of you to come out now.” But my laughter is hollow, drowned out by the flow of tears. In a moment of vulnerability, I drop my shields and let my longing for Colton surge through the tether that connects us. I need to see him—to feel him. I need to make things right.
Almost instantly, a stir of wind kicks up, carrying the familiar citrus scent of Colton. He materializes beside me in the bunker, one hand cupping my cheek and the other resting gently on my shoulder. His presence envelops me, providing the instant comfort I desperately need.
“Why are you crying? What’s wrong?” he asks, conjuring a small orb of light, and his eyes scan the bunker before settling on me with a deep frown. “Did Nyx hurt you?” His voice lowers to a growl, filled with protective fury.
“Gods, no. He didn’t do anything,” I rush to explain to prevent Colton from any rash actions.
“Then tell me what happened? Why are you crying?” Colton asks, reaching up to brush a tear from my cheek.
“Can we get out of here first? I want to talk, but not here,” I say, sniffling and struggling to control my emotions. I need a change of scenery, somewhere I can think clearly.
“Take me wherever you want, enchantress. You’re the powerful one now.” He smirks, stepping closer to me, his warmth enveloping me in reassurance. His light-hearted comment is meant to lift my spirits, and it brings a small, grateful smile to my face despite how I’m feeling about hurting Nyx.
I scoop Chepi up from the bed and let Colton wrap his arms around me. Feeling secure in his embrace, I breathe in his sweet citrus scent, focus my thoughts, and channel us away from the bunker…away from the last place I may ever see Nyx.
We touch down in Colton’s living room, and the sudden brightness from the sun streaming through the massive windows forces me to squint—the darkness of the bunker really does skew your senses. Chepi, invigorated by the familiar surroundings, leaps from my arms and scampers down the hall, his small paws echoing slightly.
The villa remains unchanged since my last visit, and I take a moment to admire the expansive glass dome overhead. The view beyond is still breathtaking, with towering cliffs and a distant waterfall framed by trees in hues of green and lavender. The bark of the trees seems to sparkle even from here.
I make my way to the large sofa in front of the flagstone fireplace, sinking into its comfy cushions. The soothing sound of water flowing through the indoor pond on the ground floor fills the room, easing the tension from my body. The beauty of this place is already soothing my soul.
Colton joins me on the sofa, turning to face me with an intent look, giving me his full attention.
“Come on, my shadow, cheer up. Talk to me,” Colton says gently, and I take a deep breath, searching for the right thing to say.
“Do you mind if I use your shower and change my clothes first?” I ask, craving a few moments alone to collect my thoughts. Honestly, I feel grimy, and after so long with only baths, a shower sounds heavenly.
“Do you want me to join you?” Colton asks, one side of his lips quirking up in a playful smirk.
I shake my head, smiling despite myself. “No, but thanks.”
“Alright, take as long as you need. I’ll be here when you’re ready,” he responds.
Grateful for the space, I head up to his bathing chamber, ready to wash away the remnants of the last couple of days.
As the warm water washes over me, I try to come to terms with the possibility that Nyx may truly be out of my life for good. The accusation of being a tease haunts me. I never intended to toy with their feelings. While I do care for Nyx, the realization settles deep within my bones: I am in love with Colton, and it’s him I want to be with.
All this time, my emotions have been a tangled mess, misled by the notion that Nyx was my destined partner. But as Drew pointed out, the choice is ultimately mine, and now knowing they are brothers, Colton could very well be the light the prophecy speaks of. His nature, always bent on saving creatures and striving to do what’s right, coupled with the white glow of his healing magic, makes him seem like a beacon of light in contrast to Nyx’s often darker demeanor.
No definitive answer will reveal which brother is the light foretold by the prophecy, so I must follow my heart, which unequivocally yearns for Colton. It pains me to think of Nyx hurting, but I hold onto the hope that someday he will understand, and perhaps in time we could even be friends...but knowing Nyx it’s probably a reach. I hate the way he looked at me in those last moments in the bunker. He didn’t seem himself, understandably so, I guess.
I rinse off the last of the soap, my tears with it. By the time I shut off the water, I feel a little better.