What If We Soar? (NY Sweethearts #2)

1. Alana

ALANA

There were a lot of days in my life I wished never happened, or moments where I could’ve just disappeared… Today seemed to be one of those days.

Person after person was pushing past me, passing red cup after red cup into their friends’ hands. Actually, they could’ve been passing strangers a drink, and I bet neither of the parties involved noticed, let alone cared.

My uncle used to tell me how much he enjoyed college and how it was the best time of his life. I believed him, but now I realized he’d been lying. Or, well, at least I was having a whole different experience.

I liked parties to an extent… when they were private, for instance. Huge college parties in one of the frat or sorority houses were not one of those parties I enjoyed.

The most amount of alcohol I drank was an occasional glass of wine when I was sitting down in the evening to watch a movie, which, to be fair, wasn’t often.

I had nothing against alcohol, nor did I care when everyone surrounding me was so drunk that they’d been talking nonsense all night long.

Unless it was a daily occurrence, then it would’ve gotten annoying.

Anyway, and I mean this in the most kindest way possible:

I did not ever want a drink from a stranger.

And each time I declined a drink from said stranger tonight, I was met with a weird look.

A year ago, I would’ve thought they were looking at me weirdly because my thighs were a little too big, or because I didn’t dress up in skimpy short dresses with tons of glitter. Or a mini skirt with… who even knew? Barely a bikini top as a cover for their tits, perhaps?

Alana from a year ago had issues. Alana from the present was totally healed, with no issues at all. Nope. None. I was the healthiest of healthy girls in the entire universe. And those looks I was met with were only because I declined a free drink at a party.

Except, this was still a frat party, every drink was free, and everyone was so drunk they wouldn’t have thought for even a second about that.

What they did probably care about, though, was the way my back rolls pushed against my dress, ready to rip it apart at the seams. Or the way my stomach was framed by the non-forgiving fabric.

And they also thought it was ridiculous that I squeezed myself into a dress that was at least two sizes too small.

Three if it were up to me.

But if I voiced all those concerns to my best friend, she would’ve murdered me right on the spot.

As we passed a group of guys, even Asiya noticed them staring, eyebrows raised almost to the sky.

“I told you, this dress looks hot on you!” she shouted over the loud music that was playing in the background. How the police hadn’t been called yet, I didn’t know.

“Sure,” I said, just to avoid her lecture. Those looks weren’t the checking-a-girl-out kind of looks; they were far worse. They were the kind of looks that made your skin crawl. The kind of looks that sent shivers down your spine in the worst way possible, spreading dread through your veins.

They were filled with disgust.

“You look gorgeous, Alana,” Asiya insisted, laying her hands on my shoulders as she looked at me. “And tonight, you’re finally going to find someone who wants to pop your cherry.” She winked at me before her attention moved past my shoulder. “With a little bit of luck, Austin might be the one.”

“No, thank you,” I replied, rolling my eyes. “I don’t need half-assed sex with some random, definitely drunk guy from a frat party.”

Though, to be fair, Austin Bennett might have been the only guy on campus I would’ve been okay with. He was kind of popular, though his popularity was nothing compared to the guys from our university’s hockey team.

Austin was one of the most handsome guys I’d ever laid eyes on. Unfortunately for me, he was going to stay a fantasy forever. There was no way he ever wanted to be seen with someone like me.

“My, God, Lana, have some fun for a change!” Asiya laughed, then wrapped her hand around my wrist to pull me out of the kitchen.

“I can have fun without taking off my clothes.” I crossed my arms as we stood outside on the back porch. It was a lot less crowded out here, and a bit quieter. However, the music was still blasting so loudly, I was going to have hearing problems if they turned the volume up any louder.

“Sure you can,” she said, shrugging at me. “And I didn’t mean it, you know that. But honestly, wouldn’t you like to have a little fling? It doesn’t have to be serious if you’re not ready for that.”

I shook my head no. “What’s the point in those?”

“To get laid.”

I shoved her away from me, laughing. “You might want to see a doctor. This behavior doesn’t seem healthy.”

Asiya nodded toward the hockey guys. “About 90 percent of those guys think about nothing but hockey and sex, yet they’re praised to the Gods. If they can fuck around without consequences, so can I.”

My eyes moved over to the hockey guys, observing them for a second.

They were chugging their drinks, laughing, and pretend-fighting like little kids. The most popular group on campus. I was almost certain everyone here knew them, if only their names.

St. Trewery was plastering the guys’ faces all over their website and social media. The hockey team was our University’s pride and joy. Most of the funds they got for the sports teams, they pumped into the hockey team. It was ridiculous.

Rumors had it, professors were giving them good grades for simply attending. Scratch that, they probably got good grades even if they never showed up to a single class, never handed in their assignments, and failed their exams miserably.

They were so entitled, and they sure acted like it as well.

“You’re staring,” Asyia singsonged. “Let’s make a bet.”

“Hell no.”

“Come on.” She stood in front of me, pouting. “It’ll be fun.”

“Bets with you will end in embarrassment for me.”

“Not this time, it won’t. I promise.”

My eyes rolled. “You say that now, then I agree, and suddenly I’ll find myself table dancing.”

Asiya laughed, then cleared her throat to stop herself and appear more serious. “I’m not going to lie, I was thinking about that just earlier today. But I have a better idea.”

“Tell me before I agree.”

She turned around, her eyes stuck on the hockey guys. “Go say hello.”

“To the hockey guys?”

She grinned at me as her hands reached up to my face, turning my head just a tiny bit to the right. My eyes immediately zoomed in on Austin.

A sigh wanted to leave me as I took in his more or less muscular body. His blond hair was a mess, as if someone had been running their hands through it more than a few times.

Austin was talking to some girl, and I bet she was the reason for his messy hair. The girl had long, black hair, a radiant smile plastered on her face, and her hand appeared almost glued to Austin’s body. I kind of wanted to hate her despite not knowing her.

“Not happening,” I forced out and tore my eyes away from them before I could even begin to get jealous of the girl’s perfect-looking body.

“You’ve had a crush on Austin pretty much since the first day of freshman year, Lana. Stop dreaming about getting with him and start actively doing things to make him notice you.”

I looked at my best friend, wondering if she’d still like me if I murdered her. Probably not. “No, thank you.”

Asiya sighed heavily. “He’s not going to bite your head off, you know?”

“He might not… but she certainly looks like she would.” I nodded in the black-haired girl’s direction. “The way she’s clawing at him, I fear she’d start barking at me.”

“I could make Kaan introduce you to Austin,” she offered. She’d been offering to make her brother do this for a year now.

“I can introduce myself just fine, thank you very much.” I really couldn’t, though.

“Whatever, I give up.” She looked around the backyard, humming to herself. “Say hi to the hockey guys then.”

“Hmm… I’ll pass. Good one, though.”

“Oh, come on.” Asiya rolled her eyes, but she kept a smile on her face in a teasing way. “You already know my—”

“Sharma!” someone yelled from across the yard. “Get your ass over here!”

“—brother,” she finished, groaning. “God, why does he always have to be so loud?”

I looked away from her, my eyes following the guy who was pushing past us to get to his friends, or probably teammates. There was a high chance they were both.

As he greeted his friends on the other side of the yard, I suddenly locked eyes with the hockey team’s number one goalie.