13. And Yet, We Stray #4
Leon didn’t let him dodge it. “Anybody with eyes can see you care about her. Hell, you probably love her. But I can also see you’re still bleeding from Katelyn, whether you want to admit that or not.
” His voice stayed calm, which somehow made it land harder.
“That’s not a crime. That’s real. But if you try to build something new while all that is still leaking out of you, you’ll stain it. ”
Trevor sat with that, jaw tight. Because it was true. He hated how true it was .
“I told her I was sorry.”
“That’s a start.”
“It felt small.”
“It was supposed to.” Leon leaned forward, forearms on his knees.
“Apologies are small. Change is what makes them mean something.” He let that breathe before continuing.
“Also, give this space. Space ain’t always punishment.
Sometimes it’s mercy. Sometimes it's you realizing that if you stay in this moment—with her—you’ll do more damage than you planned. ”
Trevor stared out at the street, hearing Aniyah’s voice all over again. I will never accept that from a man in my life. She hadn’t threatened him. Hadn’t manipulated him. She’d drawn the line and stood there. He respected the hell out of that even while it burned.
Leon studied him for another beat. “If she slows this down, let her. Don’t chase her because you’re scared of losing the feeling. Sit with what’s hurting. Mourn what needs mourning. Heal what needs healing. Then go to her when you have a handle on things. .”
Trevor huffed out a breath that held no humor. “That sounds easy when you say it.”
Leon smiled faintly. “Didn’t say it was easy. I said it was right.”
Trevor nodded, slow and reluctant and certain all at once. “I’m not trying to use her to patch something up. I know that.”
“I know you aren’t,” Leon said. “But knowing it and proving it are two different things.”
That sat in Trevor’s chest for a long time.
The porch had gone quiet again when his phone buzzed in his pocket. He pulled it out expecting Jackson, maybe Hassan with some stray production fire still burning, but it was Aniyah. His pulse jumped once, hard enough to annoy him.
He opened the message.
Roxanne : I’ve been sitting with tonight. I need you to hear me all the way through before you respond.
Trevor straightened in his chair.
Roxanne : What happened tonight does not make me want to walk away from you. But it does make me want to slow this down. We jumped into this fast, and I think we both know that.
His chest tightened, but he kept reading.
Roxanne : You’re still dealing with the fallout of Katelyn, Trevor.
The marriage may be over, but you’re still carrying it.
I saw that tonight. I’m not judging you for it.
I think it’s human. But I need you to give yourself real space to mourn and heal, so when you choose me, it won’t be because I fit inside the wound.
It’ll be because you’re whole enough to know what you’re choosing.
Trevor read that twice, slower the second time.
Roxanne : This isn’t me disappearing. I’m not asking you to leave my life. I’m asking us to take the pressure off. Breathe. Be intentional. Let this grow the right way. I will still be taking Zara on our Saturday dates.
Then one more message came through.
Roxanne : I care about you too much to just be your bandage
Trevor stared at the screen until the words blurred at the edges.
Leon didn’t ask what she said. He just watched Trevor’s face, took in the way something in him shifted, and nodded once like he already knew.
“She’s right, ain’t she?”
Trevor swallowed and looked back down at the message. “Yeah.” His voice came out rough. “She is.”
And that was the part that got him. Not just that she wanted space, but that she had given it shape.
She wasn’t pushing him away. She was trying to protect what this could become before they ruined it by rushing.
Protecting herself too, sure, but him as well.
That kind of love took vision. It took patience.
It took more maturity than he had shown her tonight.
His thumbs hovered over the screen for a second before he typed back.
I hear you. And you’re right. I’m sorry for how I spoke to you tonight, and I’m grateful you said this plainly. I care about you too much to make you carry hurt that isn’t yours. We can slow it down. I’m not going anywhere.
He hit send before he could overthink it.
The response didn’t come right away, and for once he didn’t need it to. The act of saying it honestly, without trying to negotiate her boundary smaller, settled something in him.
Leon leaned back in his chair, looking annoyingly unsurprised. “That’s the woman for you.”
Trevor let out a tired laugh, “Yeah.”
“She’s got sense.”
“She does.”
“And she likes your hardheaded ass anyway.” That made Trevor smile despite himself. Leon’s expression was gentle again. “ You’ve always been the most in tune with people out of my boys. Blessing and curse of being the youngest.”
Trevor rubbed his hands together and looked down the block. “Feels like the curse part tonight.”
“Maybe.” Leon shrugged. “But that same awareness is what’ll help you do this right, if you let it.”
Trevor nodded slowly, the resolve settling in not as fire this time, but as something steadier.
Less urgent. More sure. He thought about work, Zara, the way grief still crept up on him wearing old faces.
Thought about Aniyah refusing to be a wound dressing.
Thought about what it would mean to show up for her healed enough to hold what she offered.
“I’m not losing her,” he said quietly.
Leon glanced over at him, “Then don’t rush to keep her. Become the man she doesn't have to question.”
That hit deeper than Trevor wanted to admit.
He looked down at his phone one more time. Still no response from Aniyah. That was alright. She didn’t owe him immediacy. Not tonight.
Trevor slid the phone back into his pocket and leaned forward, elbows on his knees, letting the night air cool the last of the heat in his face.
He could still hear her voice from the condo.
Could still hear her on camera talking about how falling in love changes the way you write.
Maybe healing changed the way you loved too.
Maybe it taught you not to grab too fast at what felt good.
Maybe it taught you how to hold something carefully enough that it wanted to stay.
“I’m going to let this breathe and then show her I’m the man for her.”
Leon rocked back in his chair, satisfied in that quiet dad way of his. “Good,” he said after a while. “I know you can do it.”