45. Digger
45
DIGGER
“He said he’s on his way home from the gym.” Rae stares down at her phone, cross-legged in the middle of her bed. “He’ll let me know what he finds when he gets there in about ten minutes.”
She's in her element, her mind working overtime to solve the issue. It’s gorgeous. She’s gorgeous. Her hair falls in soft, natural waves over her shoulders, the front section pinned out of her face. Rae shifts one hand to her belly, idly rubbing low between her hips as she flicks her thumb up to close out apps.
“You sore?” I lean against her set of drawers, arms folded over my chest.
I know I went hard at her this morning, but I didn’t think I’d hurt her. That’s the issue—you never think. Shit.
“I’m okay.” Her chin lifts, and her brow lowers to a frown. “What’s the matter?”
I shrug as though I don't know. But I fucking know.
I don't like her in here. I don't want her sitting on her bed with her furniture.
It should all be ours.
Her safe place, her haven, her escape, should be ours .
“You’re lying.” Rae sets the phone aside and crawls to the end of the bed. Rested on her heels, she peers up at me, the perfect picture of submission.
I grimace, tightening my jaw as I shake that fantasy out of my head. Not today.
“What’s the matter, hon. Did I do something?”
Hon. I snap my neck so damn hard as I lift my head to look at her that I hear a crack. She’s never called me a term of endearment before, as though she’s avoided it. I don’t think she realizes she did it now.
"You didn't do anything." I drop my arms and force my body to relax before I fall to my haunches before her. "Well, nothing bad. You're doing great, baby girl. Real good."
“Then help me do better.” She touches my face, a reverent caress of her fingertips along my jaw. “I want to ease your mind a little. Distract you. Whatever you want.” She sighs. “I want to give this shitty day a silver lining for you.”
"Then promise me this." I capture her hand in mine and bring it to my lips, kissing her knuckles. When Tyke gets back, we start a project—one just for us."
Rae frowns, cocking her head a little.
“I want to wake up with you beside me every damn day.” Why the fuck is my throat so tight? "I want you there when I go to sleep. I wanna know when it's been a long day, and I'm gettin' home in the small hours that your warm body is waitin' for me."
She smiles, lop-sided and shy.
"When Tyke returns, we're figuring out where we want to be—physically. Where we want to live together. We'll have a bedroom that's never been mine or yours. It'll be a new beginning. A fresh start. With all of us together, and you feelin' like it's home. I want you happy, baby girl." I duck my chin and press my forehead to the back of her hand, still clutched in mine. "That's all I want. You, happy like you deserve to be.”
She's quiet for a long while, and the more time passes, the more I replay what I said. Did I get it wrong? Did it not sound like it did in my head? Fuck. My heart drums heavy in my chest. I’m too scared to look up.
To find her nervous.
Unsure how to tell me it was too much.
That she’s not there yet.
“Dig.” My name is a whisper as she squeezes my hand. “Look at me.”
Be a man, you pussy. I swallow and lift my chin.
She opens her mouth, yet no words come out. Tears track her cheeks, glittering along her lower lashes. She smiles briefly, failing to speak her piece again.
“What?” My voice cracks.
I notice I hold her fucking hand in a death grip and loosen off.
“You realize you're asking me to act as though we're married."
I frown. Am I? I guess I am. “That a problem?”
She huffs the cutest little laugh. “No. I just… I?—”
“You what?” I roll forward to my knees, close the gap between us as I press against the mattress.
"Are you sure?" Her tone is high and pitchy. She doesn't believe this.
How I feel about her. What she means to me.
"I love you, Rae." The words come out as though posed like a question, as though I ask permission to feel such sacred devotion for her.
If I’m worthy.
Her hands shift to my face, frantic, palms pressed against the hinges of my jaw, fingers threaded through my hair. Her eyes dart left to right, searching my gaze, a gentle smile playing with the dainty corners of her perfect mouth.
Why the hell is she so hard to look at? Why can’t I focus?
Her thumb sweeps my cheek, and I realize why. Because this fucking woman brings me to tears. Good tears.
I tuck my chin down, the urge to hide my weakness automatic. Yet she grips hard, forcing me to stay looking at her.
“Don’t hide this from me.” Another sweep of her thumb. “Don’t deny me this, Digger.”
“I ain’t trying to.”
“Then tell me why the tears. Explain this to me, babe.”
There she goes again, cleaving my goddamn heart into pieces and tenderly wrapping each one before she pockets it for herself.
"I don't know," I say, genuine this time. "I guess…" I sigh, making my head ache while I try to work it out. "I guess I feel fuckin' lucky you wanna be mine."
"Why wouldn't I want to be?" She laughs, a gentle jest rather than derisive. "You're fucking amazing, Digger. You were the first to make me feel welcome here. Seen." Rae hesitates, swallows, and twitches that coy smile again. "You accept me for who I am. I feel lucky that you’d choose me to be yours.”
“Guess we’re as fucking fortunate as each other then, huh?” I laugh a little.
Feel reassured when she does, too. "I guess."
“So, it’s a yes?” I turn my head and kiss her palm.
She leans in and places her lips against mine, sweet, gentle, loving. “It is. Let’s pretend we’re married. You, me, and Tyke.”
“Who said anything about pretendin’?”
"It's illegal, Dig." She pulls back and bops me on the nose. "I know you're not worried about that sort of stuff, but it doesn't change the facts."
"I know that." I roll my eyes and rest back on my heels. "But I ain't pretending, Rae. It might not be official on a bit of dead tree, but it's real to me. I want to call you my wife. Will you let me do that? Will you let Tyke if he wants to?”
She smiles, but her eyes are sad as she drops her head with a sigh. "Let's just get him home first."
As though on cue, her phone chimes from its spot nestled on the covers.
She dives left, snatches the device up, and falls to her side to swipe open the message. I crawl over the end of the bed, settling myself behind her to see what that twisted-up little motherfucker has to say.
He’s here. No casualties—yet.
Rae’s thumbs fly over the screen.
What are they doing? What will YOU do?
They're talking in the garden. What do you want me to do, baby?
Rae twists to glance over her shoulder at me.
“What?”
“You growled.”
“Did I?” I lift an eyebrow.
She grins. “You did.”
“Fucker shouldn’t call you things like that.”
"I don't pay it any mind," she assures me, already typing a reply.
“I know. But he shouldn’t think it’s okay to, regardless.”
Her right hand slips to my thigh, rubbing back and forth as she finishes the reply with her left.
I want you to keep my man safe.
P.S. Digger said he’ll remove your tongue if you call me ‘baby’ again.
Bet he will.
I want a running commentary, Connor. I’m fucking losing my mind here.
Ballsy, I figure, asking her ex to relay the actions of her current lover. Sure enough, the kid pushes his luck.
What’ll you give me for it?
What the fuck does he expect her to say? A blowjob? Nudes? Jesus fuck, this guy needs an ego check.
Rae sighs, fingertips light against her brow. "He's predictable if nothing else." She sighs, slides her right hand to my cock, and palms it through my jeans. "What do you think?"
“You expect me to answer that right now?” I rock into her touch. “While you’re doing this?”
“You’re no stranger to making decisions under duress, are you?” She turns her face up and sets butterfly kisses against my throat.
I damn near come in my pants.
Erotic touch—it’s my kryptonite.
“Tell him he gets to live.” I’m dead serious.
From the way her tongue flicks over my Adam's apple, she knows it. "Okay."
The ability to stay breathing.
His dots start, stop, start, then pause for long enough that her screen goes dull. All the while, my woman, my old lady, my wife if she’ll let it, continues to palm my cock, wrapping her hand around the thickening length. I reach down, flick my buckle open, and adjust my dick so the tip of my erection peeks out of the denim.
Rae sets her phone down and rolls onto her back beneath me. Her gaze is on mine, drowsy and loved up, as she teases the head with her fingertips, relishing every reactive twitch she gets. My breaths come faster and heavier, and yet I can't look away from her.
She’s the most relaxed I’ve seen her since she arrived at the clubhouse, and I can't help but feel—hormones aside—that it's because of me, my brother, and what we've done for her.
I kiss her. Steal her taste and relish in her whimper as she opens for me. Tongue against hers, I angle my head and deepen the connection. She sets her free hand against my chest, slides the other inside my jeans and my boxers, and takes firm hold of what's hers.
I rock into her, repeat the action when she groans, and fuck her hand as we continue to kiss like two horny teenagers left at home alone.
I’m goddamn seconds from blowing my load when the illumination of her phone behind her head snares my attention.
I’ll do this for you, BABY. But only because it’s not over between us. Not yet.
Rae’s grip tightens on the crown of my cock, twisting a little as her thumb rubs the tip before she continues to pump it harder, faster. I reread the message and grin as my climax rips into me, hot cum spilling over her fist.
He lost whatever chance he had left the fucking second that I laid eyes on her.
And he goddamn knows it.