Chapter 20
Istalk through the halls, half my mind still with Clara tucked away in my room. Dimitri appears next to me and nods, then grabs me and yanks me through a random door.
“We've gotta stop meeting like this,” Dimitri says with a grin that doesn't quite reach his eyes.
“Get to the point, Dimitri.”
“You think they actually use any of these cleaning supplies? I mean, it's not like Thursdays are for deep cleaning.”
“We don't even have Thursdays in Hell,” I grumble.
He tilts his head, contemplating that. “Suppose so. Anyway, what exactly did you do with her after I poofed?”
“I took care of her.”
“Well, that isn't ominous,” he mutters.
The last thing I want is to give him details about Clara.
Not only is it not my story to tell, but it puts her in more danger if he knows.
All it would take is a suspicion from one of the upper level demons and they'd be dragging Dimitri's ass into a room.
They'd force him to talk, whether he wanted to or not.
I won't put him in that position. While Hell works like a well-oiled machine, we're still demons.
He'd be tortured for the information in his head.
“You figure out where you're getting summoned to?” I ask. He wrinkles his nose and glances away. “Are you glowing?”
His gaze snaps back to mine. “What? No. Why the fuck would I be glowing? It's not like anything happened to make me light up. I haven't been anywhere. I mean, other than the closet in some random witch's house. At least, I assume they're a witch. I mean, what else could it be?”
“What the fuck is wrong with you?”
“Who, me? Nothing. I told you it's nothing.”
The muscle under his eye twitches and he is glowing a deep purple. I don't know if he's on the edge of burnout like I was. While I burst into flames and burn from the inside out, he lights up like a lightning storm. It's just as deadly. This isn't anything like what he usually goes through.
“Holy shit, did you get cursed?”
“What? No.” He forces out a laugh.
“Then why's your voice all squeaky and high?” I grip the back of my neck. “First Clara, now you. I just can't catch a fucking break.”
“Wait, Clara's cursed too?” He grimaces when I give him a look. “Fine, I might be. What's wrong with Clara? Is she still here?”
“I'm not telling you shit. It'll only get both of us in trouble.”
Dimitri taps his finger to his chin, then nods. “Fine, but you know you're going to need my help. Especially if she's cursed.”
“She's not cursed. She's spellsick.” The words slip out before I can stop them.
His face lights up like I've handed him fries. “Omen, seriously? You know what to do. She's spellsick and you're her soulbound. Do the freaky and she'll be better.”
I scrub my hands down my face and mumble, “You did not just call it the freaky.”
“Oh ho, I did. How you think she got spellsick?”
“She's got a book.”
“A grimoire?”
I shake my head. “Not exactly. I've got an idea where it came from, but that shit is sentient. The fucking thing keeps fucking with reality.”
“Yet it got you and her together.”
“Won't mean shit if the book keeps showing her spells to make her sick.”
He rolls his eyes. “Already told you how to help with that. Now, go get your girl.” He pushes me around and slaps my ass before shoving me out the door.
Unfortunately, he shoves me straight into Ludovic. The older demon stumbles back. Before I can react, his fist slams into my cheek. Dimitri whispers a curse from behind me. Ludo pulls his fist back again and I raise my arm to block it. He drops his hand to his side.
“Where the fuck have you been?”
Dimitri slides around me, a placating grin on his face.
“Ludo! Just the demon I wanted to see. We've got a problem with the gauntlet.
Triton says the fireballs keep going haywire.
Omen's going to help us out. Hope you don't mind.
You can talk to Triton if you do. I'm sure he'll tell you to fuck off, but you can try.”
Dimitri claps him on the back, then grabs my arm and hauls me away. He marches us down the hallway, back toward my rooms. Once we're far enough away, he pulls me to a stop.
“You'd better rank up if you don't want Ludo on your ass.”
“I'm not ranking up. I like where I am,” I grumble.
“Yeah, sure. You just love the paperwork and the shit Ludo throws at us, and the portal duties, and the night watches, and—”
“Okay, I get it. I hate my job. Except if I level up, I'll be…” Alone.
I'll be completely alone. Except I won't be, not if I keep Clara with me.
If she wants to stay here, I could rank up and spend the extra time with her.
A new rank would allow me to pick what I want to do, whether it was train new demons or manage the lower ranks.
Hell, I could even take over Ludo's job. He'd fucking hate that.
“You know…if you level up, you'd outrank Ludo. Definite perk.”
“And I wouldn't be able to go back to the human dimension,” I whisper.
“Yeah, but she's here now. Maybe—”
“I'm not having this conversation,” I growl.
He nods, then curls his hands into fists as a tremor rocks him. “You should definitely have it with your witch.”
“No. I'm not having this conversation at all. I'm not ranking up. I'm not trapping her here. I'm not keeping her.”
I stalk off, not waiting for his response.
He'll just lecture me some more and try to get me to change my mind.
It's hard enough being in this position. Two impossible options. Either I keep things the way they are, hoping the answer drops in my lap, or I resign myself to an eternity of yearning for an existence I’ll never experience.
“You can't make decisions for her,” Dimitri calls after me. “You don't get to dictate her future, Omen.”
I wave without looking, then disappear into the ether. Dimitri isn't wrong. I'm not about to admit that, though. I'm used to making decisions alone and having others follow them. Taking Clara into account, especially when I'm not entirely sure what she'll say, terrifies me.
If I ask her to leave her life behind in the human dimension and stay here, she could end up resenting me.
If I follow her home, I'll lose my magic, eventually leaving me a creature born from nightmares.
I won't be able to glamour or control my shadows.
She'll have to kill me once I no longer recognize her face.
I don't want her to go through that. My memories, my friend’s remembrance of me, my ability to jump between dimensions. I don't want to lose any of it.
None of it really matters if I lose her, though. Being soulbound means I'll constantly be searching for her. For the rest of my existence, I'll never be free of her memory. Especially now that I know her intimately.
When I step from the void, and land right outside my bedroom door, I let out a sigh of relief.
My muscles relax as I enter, anticipating seeing Clara again.
I freeze in the doorway and my gaze skips around the space.
It's empty, devoid of life, but her scent remains.
If she's delirious, she could be wandering around Hell.
She could fall into a portal and end up anywhere.
I rush to the bathroom, then back to the bedroom.
Living room, office, weapons room, and finally the kitchen.
All of them empty. I close my eyes and focus on the thread tying us together.
My fist slams into the wall when it doesn't work.
I shouldn't be surprised. Trying to use a mythical power I don't know much about is ludicrous.
“Why are you punching things? Also, you lied to me.” Clara drops a paper bag on the island made of obsidian like everything else in this place. She starts pulling ingredients from inside.
Magic swirls around me and my wings burst from my back. “Where were you?”
She frowns at the ingredients, then shrugs.
“I'm not entirely sure. I woke up and you were gone.” Her head pops up and she glares at me.
“That's what you lied about, if you were wondering.
Anyways, I went looking for you. Opened a door and it was an empty closet with this bag and your cat sitting on the floor.
You shouldn't lock your cat in a closet, by the way. It's rude.”
“You weren't here. I searched the entire house.”
“Are you calling me a liar?”
I throw my hands up and stalk around the island. I grab her and haul her into me. She lets out an oh. I bury my face in her hair and breathe her in.
“Are you feeling better?”
She shivers and her nails dig into my back. “It comes and goes. I'll be fine.”
I cup her cheeks and tip her face up. “I still think you're spellsick.”
She gives me a look, pressing her lips together. “Then how do I get over it? I assume that's what you were doing—trying to figure out how to heal me.”
Shit. I can't tell her what Dimitri said.
She'll think I'm just trying to fuck her.
I am, but that's not the point. Instead of answering, I cover her mouth with mine.
She melts into me, parting her lips. I only meant to distract her, yet I'm drawn into her.
I should let go, send her home, and leave her be. Except I can't.
She pulls back and whispers, “Omen, we need to talk.”
I groan, resting my forehead on hers. “I know.”
“If you fuck me, are you going to disappear again?”
I let out a chuckle. “You're here so you wouldn't be summoning me. And I can't be summoned in Hell.”
“You can't?”
“Nope. If I was lower rank, sure. It's annoying as shit.” I brush my lips over hers. “Are you going to keep asking me questions, or can I fuck you now?”
“I suppose we can discuss the other things later,” she murmurs. “Don’t think I forgot what you said when you were in that cage. But, yeah, later.”
“Perfect.”