Hell Hath No Fury.
Staring at Ramsilel with Hellfire in his eyes, Malachi clenched his teeth.
I knew it. I’m going soft. I let that fucker chain me up over a kid.
A fucking child who wanted to see the fallen lieutenant.
Friend of the angels. That’s working out really well, isn’t it?
Stupid fucking demons. His internal tirade continued until the lizard demon snapped his claws in front of his nose to get his attention.
“Are you done?” Ramsilel drawled, boredom coloring his tone as he studied his own talons with feigned nonchalance.
He glanced at Malachi with an amused smirk and straightened from where he’d been leaning against the wall in the new cave he’d been dragged to.
“Clever, sneaking out the way you did. I dare say if you hadn’t stopped to have a chat with our young friend here, you most likely could have escaped back to the human realm.
” He paused next to Mordecai, who was also chained up and gagged in the corner.
Patting the boy on the head, he chuckled as the young demon flinched under his touch.
Glancing between the two, Ramsilel frowned. “Is this your spawn? The resemblance is uncanny.” Shrugging, he moved closer to Malachi. “It matters not. When the show begins, we’ll see what he’s made of.”
“Show?” Malachi sneered. “So, you’re going to put on a spandex dress and shimmy your sorry ass around for me like a quarter-night hooker? Got news, sweetheart, not interested. I’m more of a polyester kind of guy.”
Eyes flashing with anger for a second, Ramsilel’s shoulders tensed before he shook it off and forced a laugh. He clearly wanted to strike Malachi, but something held him back. Glancing toward the mouth of the tunnel, waiting for someone.
“Hey, by the way, the four-armed freak I killed—he a friend of yours? Oh, and I need Clowdus and Tracantor’s addresses. I want to send them some sympathy flowers in memory of their brother the gate ornament. Want to go in halvsies?” Malachi blinked prettily.
“Hard pass,” Ramsilel drawled, then brightened as footsteps echoed into the cave.
He trotted over to meet the other demon.
A bright yellow-skinned female with stubby horns and a dingy brown tail like a horse.
It was long and dragged the ground, but she ignored it as she stomped toward Ramsilel with a grin.
“Heard you found little Pestilence and locked her up. You didn’t bring her back for me to play with?” the hideous female pouted. Her skin was covered in warts and random lumps. By demon standards, she would be considered a catch.
Snorting, Malachi lifted his chin and groaned. “Gross, you have to be Zyrinnia. You’re even more disgusting than Luna said you were! She was clearly just being nice. Ugh.”
Zyrinnia lunged toward him like she would strike him, but Ramsilel grabbed her and held her back. “You can’t touch him, remember? That’s not the plan. We have to be patient to get what we want.”
Malachi perked up at this information. He wasn’t to be killed yet, which meant he could needle them further to find out more.
Slitherok hissed as if he guessed Malachi’s plan. Or maybe he just liked to hiss.
“Look, Rammy Jammies, if you’re still butthurt about the whole Heaven-Hell liaison thing, I’ll ask Nick if he’ll work with you again.
But you’re gonna have to apologize to him for being a dick.
Probably have to grovel a bit. You know, on your knees.
I heard you’re good at that. Or maybe you want your own angel to fuck?
I don’t know that there’s any that would debase themselves that far, but I can ask around. ”
Finally getting the result he was looking for, Malachi blinked, trying to clear his vision.
After striking Malachi across the face, Ramsilel stood over him, breathing heavily as his fists clenched at his sides.
“Shut the fuck up. Lucifer’s sack, you never shut up!
I cannot for the death of me see what the Heaven she likes about you.
Personally, I think she should have just killed you on sight! ”
“What’s wrong with me? I’m quite the catch!
” Malachi protested with indignation. He tossed his hair like a cover model and pouted with his best sensual stare.
“A hunter on the streets and a freak in the sheets. I can make you want me so bad you’ll crawl to me across a field of building blocks and won’t even cry about how bruised your knees are.
No one wants to kill me! Except maybe that one guy I bit when he wouldn’t submit to Chuck’s commands. ”
Snorting in disgust, Ramsilel groaned and covered his face, digging his talons into his skin.
“Should have killed you. Along with that fucking cousin of yours and that Pestilence chick. All of them. Should have ended you all so I wouldn’t have to listen to this shit.
But no, for some reason, she thinks she’s in love with you. ”
Grinning with full insolence, as Zyrinnia voiced her agreement, Malachi winked at his captor.
“It’s the hair. She loves it. Always touching it, staring at it.
Plus, my winning personality. And I bathe regularly, so I don’t stink.
You should try it.” He mimed gagging before waggling his eyebrows.
“Also, she likes the bondage scene. Figures, girl likes handcuffs, it’s a slippery slope from that to ropes, gags, safe words… ” He shrugged.
Stepping back with a triumphant grin, Ramsilel shook his head.
“Oh, now that’s funny.” He began to laugh then.
Not a small chuckle or brief snort of amusement.
This was a full belly laugh that boomed through the cavern.
It went on for so long, tears finally leaked from his eyes, and he gasped as he tried in vain to catch his breath.
Slitherok hissed with him, and Zyrinnia laughed too.
Her laugh sounded more like a donkey braying, which matched her equine-like appearance.
Studying him with concern as the grin slowly left his face, Malachi frowned. “You know, after you just got done telling me how abhorrently unfunny I am— which, by the way, rude. And hurtful —I’m afraid I don’t get the joke here. Perhaps you can enlighten me?”
Ramsilel waved him off, still gripping his stomach as he hiccupped slightly.
“Got it,” Malachi declared with a decisive nod.
“You’ve lost your shit completely. Bound to happen when you hang out with non-verbal lizard demons and unholy ponies.
Anyway, gonna take a little nap. Wake me up when you get it together, huh?
” He slouched the best he could in the chair he was tied to, surreptitiously trying to free himself from the chains.
Even if he couldn’t get them off completely, he thought he might be able to break the chair and make a run for it.
Even bound in demon form, he was fast, and if he could get outside again, he’d fly out of here.
He chanced a quick glance at the child, Mordecai, and suffered a pang of guilt about leaving him to the tender mercies of the demons here.
He had no doubt they would punish the little one for helping Malachi escape earlier.
Cursing himself for his inconvenient feelings, he tried to gauge the distance and calculate how much time it would take to snatch the kid and carry him out.
It would slow him down quite a bit, but he just needed to get to the mouth of the cave.
He would fly through the nearest portal, then figure out where the little demon belonged.
Scuffling as Ramsilel filled his vision once more drew his attention back to his prison guards. Now the lizard demon was also standing there, a large smarmy grin on his scaly face while his tongue flicked rapidly in excitement. The horsewoman stood on his other side, glaring viciously.
His tone sarcastic and delighted, Ramsilel spoke again.
“You think I’m talking about your little cop girlfriend?
Oh no, Malachi. See, you’ve had it wrong this whole time.
It was never about Amaryllis or the angels.
It wasn’t about Pestilence or even the fact your human is actually a Nephilim.
It was amusing though, to watch you all running around trying to figure it out.
That idiot Flick thinking we didn’t know he was spying on us? Truly a thing of unholy beauty.”
Confusion and a nagging sense of doom slid through Malachi’s veins like an icy sludge, chilling him to the core.
If this wasn’t about Chuck, or Nick, not even Luna or Amaryllis, what was this about?
He glanced at the kid again, but Ramsilel didn’t seem to know who he was, so it wasn’t him either.
Opening his mouth, he was about to retort with a smart-ass remark when he caught a familiar scent.
His nostrils twitched, and his stomach dropped.
A lilting giggle filled the air, and the sickeningly sweet scent of floral decay swept into the room moments before footsteps announced someone new joining the party. A small light bobbed as the female demon entered, a flickering flame from the brimstone lantern held aloft in her hand.
As she drew closer, Malachi’s fear was confirmed.
He knew who had him captive now and why.
He studied the wrinkly skin, the trail of dirt following each step.
The bright yellow eyes, lit up with glee at seeing him bound before her.
Shuddering, he swallowed down the rise of bile in his throat, remembering that one night with revulsion.
It was certainly not a proud moment, and it would not make his highlight reel. A blooper reel was much more likely.
As she pranced to a halt in front of him, an expectant smile curved her leathery face. With horror, he realized she was beaming like she expected him to jump up and embrace her. He thought this was revenge. Oh, it was so much worse. Now he knew what had made Ramsilel laugh so hard.
Even now, the other demon had his palms over his mouth, making snuffling noises as he tried to breathe while not laughing out loud. The lizard demon was also suspiciously shaking, trying to rein in his own amusement.
Only the child seemed confused as his bright eyes darted between them all, trying to figure out what was going on.
As much as he didn’t want to admit it to himself, he knew he was going to have to acknowledge the bulbous female staring at him expectantly.
He wasn’t sure if praying while he was in Hell would have the same effect that it did above ground.
There was a good chance there was some dampener or barrier keeping prayers inside.
Otherwise, the tortured souls’ constant wail would never end.
Or perhaps they could hear it, but knowing there was nothing they could do, they ignored it.
Regardless, he doubted he could reach Nick, but he wasn’t above trying.
Closing his eyes, Malachi prayed hard. Begging Nick to find him, save him from this torment. Release him from the Hell he was in. Dante’s imagination surely never showed him a scenario like this. The man would have ended up in an asylum if he even caught a whiff of this situation.
An expectant and aggressive clearing of a throat jolted him, his eyes flinging open as he stared into the much closer gaze of his biggest regret. Outside of eating brimstone, of course, but since that had cleared up, thanks to Jaxon’s forced colonoscopy prep, this now topped the list.
Bobbing her head like a demented seal, she giggled again, breathing out his name. “Malachi!”
“Honeysuckle,” he groaned, finally greeting Hyacinth’s daughter.