Chapter Forty Sophie #2
Tonya bursts through the door seconds later, and I'm already smiling at the Santa hat perched crookedly on her head, which completely clashes with the usual black leather jacket she's wearing. She smiles broadly and hikes a large duffel bag over her shoulder, entering with a flourish.
"Merry Christm—" Tonya stops in her tracks once she sees Tess...
The smile drops from her face, and she visibly swallows.
... is Tonya blushing?
The blonde woman blinks rapidly, as if her brain has rebooted, and inhales sharply to speak, then immediately chokes on the air and coughs. "Oh, uh... hey..."
"Hello again," Tess says, mouth curving into a slight grin. "Tonya..."
"Hey... T-Tess..." Tonya says, clearing her throat and shifting the bag over her shoulder. "Nice to see you... again..."
Frowning, I glance back and forth between my sister and Tonya, who's doing an excellent impression of a tomato right now. "You guys already met?"
"Tonya picked up Tess from the airport..." Callum explains to me, head tilted, looking at Tonya with concern before it shifts to surprise, then... amusement.
"Yeah, I mean..." Tonya shrugs, suddenly fascinated by the hardwood floor. "W-Was no big deal..."
Tess just smiles at her, her face filling with affection as she looks at the stuttering, blushing woman. I blink at Tonya, peering at her like she's been possessed because this is not Tonya.
This isn't fierce, confident, not-giving-a-single-fuck Tonya?
Oh, wait...
I might have chemo brain still, but the dots are suddenly connecting.
Oh...
Oh!
I glance at Callum. He's already grinning, shaking his head slowly like he knew this was coming.
I've always known Tess is a lesbian, ever since I was a kid.
It was another reason my parents disapproved of her.
They weren't the types to be outwardly bigoted, but they would be fine if it were another kid and they absolutely did not want their own child to be gay.
It otherized Tess in their eyes, and they worried about what others would think.
Tess being a lesbian wasn't a deal breaker for them, but the disapproval only further fractured their relationship. I never saw it as anything but a part of what made my sister who she is, and my sister is one of the greatest people I've ever known.
Tess likes women the same way I like men. How could that ever be wrong?
She's never had a steady, long-term girlfriend before. With her job and her personality—type A, particular, maybe a little too intense and direct for people—she's never found someone to settle down with.
And Tonya, who's bold, protective, loyal, quick with sarcasm, and quicker with her fists, might be the exact type of balance Tess needs.
But Tonya's still grieving her late wife, so she might need more time to heal.
No matter, with Tess getting out of the military and moving, they could take their time to see if something could grow.
All I know is, I'm surrounded in this room by people who love me, and that's all that matters.
Tonya seems to gain her bearings and blinks out of the spell, walking over to Callum and me and planting a big smacking kiss on both of our heads.
"Alright, gather around, kids," Tonya announces, reaching into her back pocket with a grand flourish and producing a Blu-ray disk. "I have presents, and then later, we will watch the greatest Christmas movie of all time."
Tonya clears her throat and puts on an awful German accent, "' Now I have a machine gun. Ho-ho-ho... '"
◆◆◆
Tonya, Callum, and Tess are playing cards at the kitchen table.
It's some game that when they tried to explain the rules to me, my brain immediately shut off, and I kindly bowed out before my eyes glazed over.
I think my mind is a little too active right now to pay attention to a game, anyway.
But from the noise they're making at the table, they're having a good time.
And it just makes me so happy to hear them.
I wanted Tess to approve of Callum so much, and from the smiling looks she keeps shooting me, I can tell she does.
Callum is always so in tune with me, asking me if I'm okay, if I feel alright, if I need anything, if I'm hungry or thirsty, or if I want to go take a nap.
He does it like it's as natural as breathing for him, without making me feel like he's hovering.
Tess just looks on in approval every time he does.
Earlier, after dinner, I insisted on helping clean the plates even as Maeve and Callum tried to tell me to go sit and rest. I refused, and Tess—bless her—offered to wash while I dried.
Callum grumbled, but when he saw that I wasn't backing down, he brushed a kiss on my head and said to call him if I needed him before stepping outside with Tonya to keep her company while she smoked.
"He's more attentive than Paul," Tess said casually, handing me a dish. "He's always watching you, making sure you're okay, making sure you feel okay. I like him."
I eyed her skeptically, "You don't like anyone."
And she doesn't. It took her a long time to even warm up to tepid with Paul, and with my exes—Spencer, she tolerated, but Max, she despised.
"Yeah, well," she'd replied, glancing toward the back door where Callum and Tonya had disappeared. "Things change."
Now, I smile as I watch my sister chuckle and shake her head at something Callum says. Maeve walks up next to me and wraps an arm around my shoulder, gently squeezing, and I lean into her embrace, laying my head on her shoulder.
"Do you remember your last reading?" she asks quietly, after a couple of minutes.
"I'll never forget," I smile immediately. "The Tower, Strength, The Star, Two of Cups..."
Thinking back to that day when I walked into this store by chance, on the worst day of my life, and ended up meeting my soulmate...
"The Tower... sudden disruption, often necessary. What has broken needed to break. It feels like destruction, but it's just the removal of waste."
Paul cheating on me, while painful, was necessary because, as I think back now on our relationship, I am certain that he was not the person I needed next to me through this journey.
I needed Callum. Maeve. Tonya. Bailey. Atticus and Jane.
Parker. April. Sasha and every other new friendship that I forged through the fallout of Paul's betrayal.
The pain, the breaking, the pure destruction of my life was worth it because it allowed me to build something better.
Something I never even dreamed of. True friendship. A family.
Pure love.
"Strength... Not force. Courage, the quiet kind. You already possess the inner fortitude to face your challenges head-on."
"The Star. Healing. Healing. Hope. You will face your challenge and will come out on the other side better for it."
I've learned that I'm much stronger than I even realized.
Before, I had faith in myself and confidence that I would be able to make it through this journey.
I would be a little beaten down but not out.
I was terrified, but I still put one foot in front of the other and moved forward.
And I feel as though I'm at the top of the ride, looking down at the drop, and ready to just let go and face it.
The surgery is the bridge between chemo and radiation, and I'm ready to get this done and over with.
So that I can continue with my life. This life that I'm building, that I'm so excited to experience fully, without limits, without cancer lingering in the back of my mind.
"Two of Cups. A bond. Chosen. Mutual. Not rescue—true partnership. Not just in romance, but also in friendships."
And I discovered love beyond my wildest dreams.
Through this chaos, I fell in love with a man who showed up for me, who remained steadfast through every new curveball life tried to throw at me, at us.
And still, he just stayed steady and loving.
Not only what he's done for me, but who he is as a person.
Callum is so kind to everyone he encounters.
He's loyal, trustworthy, and honest. I've never laughed harder around someone before, especially when he accidentally puts his whole foot in his mouth and blushes beet red.
We like the same movies, books, and music.
We hold the same values. We want the same things in the future—travelling, settling down, marriage, maybe kids if my body allows it.
"Could I read your tarot again?" Maeve asks, with a smile. "With my beautiful, brand new deck?"
"Of course," I say, warmth swelling in my chest. Maeve picks up the tarot, the wooden cards whispering against one another as she shuffles them with practiced grace.
The designs catch the candlelight—etched suns, constellations, soft washes of color burned into the wood. I cut the deck, place my hand on top for a moment, grounding myself, and Maeve flips the first card.
"The Empress," Maeve hums, her face brightening like she's been waiting for this one. "The Divine Feminine. Even in change, you are still whole—still Sophie."
My breath catches in my throat. The Empress's figure looks serene and maternal on the card, surrounded by stars and crescent moons. She looks incredibly feminine and beautiful, exactly how I wish to feel after this surgery.
Maeve turns the next card. "The Nine of Wands," she says thoughtfully. "Resilience and perseverance after this long battle. But you are right on the cusp of victory."
I feel that same feeling I felt all those months ago during my very first reading with her.
I hadn't really believed back then, but Maeve was so kind, so warm, and I thought it could be fun.
But the impact—the words she gave me, the ones that tucked themselves quietly into my mind and flared when I needed them.
When I went to the first book club meeting.
When I saw Paul kissing Elise outside Haunts.
When I confessed to Callum that I wasn't okay.
When my hair started falling out.
When Callum shaved my head.
When I confronted Elise at the store.
When I confessed my love for Callum.