31. Chapter 31
Chapter 31
Rina
Of fucking course, we run into Tyler here. The second I realized it was him, I was hoping he would just do a little wave and then move on, but nope. I’m now in the middle of a dick measuring contest. I can see Arlo about to lose his shit, but luckily, Tyler walks away before things get out of hand.
“Was that the prick you tried to make me jealous with?” Arlo asks quietly, contentious of Tyler’s date still behind us.
“Jesus. First, it was weeks ago; second, it was never really going to go anywhere, and you know that, so chill out.” This is turning out to be a great date.
“He sure didn’t sound like he felt it was going nowhere.”
“Well, I can’t speak for him. For me, it was going nowhere as evidence of where I ended up that night,” I calmly counter.
Arlo’s head tips back as he takes a deep breath. This is not how I saw tonight going, especially after the verbal foreplay we’ve been doing all day. Is this some kind of sign that we’re trying too hard at something that was never meant to be? I know that’s bullshit, but damn, every time we start to really make progress together, something pops up and pushes us ten steps back .
“I’m sorry,” he says as he refocuses on me. “There was no reason to react to any of that when he’s basically inconsequential. I was just jealous … again.”
His honesty and quick assessment of the situation makes it clear as day how much work he’s really put in. Although, I’ll say his jealousy is kind of hot.
“It’s okay. He was super aggressive for no real reason. I mean, we went on half of a date if you can even call it that.” I roll my eyes as I laugh, hoping to brush the whole situation to the side. I also peek over Arlo’s shoulder to see what his new date looks like and maybe to throw her a quick warning, but footsteps sound next to me, signaling either our waiter or Tyler. Looking up, I see it’s the latter, and he has a sneer on his face fully directed at me.
Geez, what did I ever see in that asshole? People flake on dates all the time. It’s not like we were set to get married and live all our days together. This feels extreme for the situation, and it’s making me feel super uneasy.
Arlo’s eyes follow him as he passes and then sits down with his date. Poor woman has no idea what she’s getting into with that one. Or maybe she does and she into the whole asshole thing, who knows.
“Okay, back to our date,” I say as I pick up my drink and take a healthy sip, hoping the liquor somehow saves how awkward everything has turned, thanks to Tyler.
“Good plan.”
We stare at each other silently as we try to think about what to talk about.
“So, I think I’m finally caught up with orders again. Everyone was super understanding when I had to adjust delivery dates and such, but you, cleaning everything up and restocking everything I could ever need, really helped.”
“Good. I’m glad I could help get you back on track.” His tone is almost clinical and I snap, wanting to break the tension so badly.
“For fuck’s sake,” I mutter. “I’m dating you. I want to be with you. Fuck everything else, okay?”
“God, I love this feisty side of you. It’s so fucking sexy,” he whispers. And just like that, the awkwardness breaks.
“It’s a damn good thing you like it because it’s seventy percent of my personality.” I take another sip of my drink.
Waiters come with our food, placing our plates in front of us before disappearing without a word. This is one of the fancy bistros where they don’t ask a lot of questions but still somehow have impeccable service. I wasn’t lying when I said I felt out of place earlier. This isn’t my usual style, but I love that he’s putting in the extra effort for me. For us.
We both dig in, moaning at how delicious the steaks we both got are, and before I know it, we’re both finishing our meals without having said much of anything to each other.
“Damn, that was phenomenal. Sorry, I lost track of all thoughts outside of how good the steak was,” Arlo says, putting his napkin down on the table.
“Don’t be sorry. We might have to come here once a month to get our fix.”
“I can make that happen.” He smiles.
Planning for the future. Who knew that was something I would actually look forward to, and with Arlo of all people? But I feel like me, not the me I had to be when my parents died but the me I always wanted to be. As much as Arlo has made changes for himself, I hope he can see I’m trying to do the same. I’m trying to step out of my comfort zone to really jump in with both feet, even if it scares the shit out of me.
“I’d like that very much. What do you say we grab the check and head out of here? Maybe go back to my house.” I don’t even try to be seductive, but my meaning is clear as day.
“I’d say that sounds like the best idea yet.” He flags down our waiter for the check, and within ten minutes we’re back in his truck, heading back home.
Arlo’s asleep next to me after our very vigorous activities tonight. I should be fast asleep too, but my brain won’t be quiet.
I keep thinking about how weird Tyler was at dinner. About how the last few months have garnered more change than I think I was ready for. About this damn stalker. And oddly enough, I’m thinking about Lennox and how he’s coping when all we see is the face he puts on around us all. It makes me realize I’m not as well-adjusted as I want to be when it comes to what happened to him or what is currently happening to me.
I reach over to my nightstand and grab my phone, opening up a text thread and sliding out of bed to head to the bathroom.
Me:
Are you awake?
Lenny:
I am. Why are you?
Me:
Couldn’t sleep. My brain is thinking about … everything.
Lenny:
Well, that’s always a shitty option.
Me:
How are you doing? I mean, like how are you just moving on and living?
Lenny:
I’m … not really? I know you guys all see that I’m not 100% there at family dinners, but I appreciate you all for not bringing attention to it. It’s strange because I know logically what happened to me, but it’s like I have a mental block where I don’t think about what specifically happened. Does that make sense?
Me:
It does. But that doesn’t really help me right now, ha ha.
Lenny:
What’s going on?
Lenny:
I’m not trying to throw my shit at you because we need to move forward as a family, and I’ll be okay eventually. I know that.
I sniffle as his last texts comes in because I feel like I’ve failed him. He’s going through so much, and none of us knows how to help him. We may be hindering him more than anything, and that breaks my heart. But I also texted him for a reason. He’s always been pretty point blank with any advice, and I need that now more than ever, even if it makes me feel like a shitty sister.
Me:
Things with Arlo are progressing, and it’s scary. It’s good. I know that, but…
I realize he wasn’t at family dinner when I filled in a lot of the blanks, and I hesitate.
Lenny:
But what?
Me:
You tell no one what I’m about to say…
Lenny:
*rolls eyes* Who the fuck do I talk to anymore?
Well, now I just feel selfish. But I’m about to tell him more than what the rest of the family knows, and I just need to cover my bases.
Me:
Arlo and I were a thing back in the day before Mom and Dad died. And it ended … badly. I’ve never really wanted anyone else, but now that things are kind of coming full circle, it scares me that he’s going to crush my heart again, and I don’t think I can survive it again. And then there’s this asshole who keeps texting me and sending me shit. My nerves are frayed, and you always shoot straight and I need that blunt honesty right now, even if it means I’m selfish as hell. I am sorry about that; I promise I’ll bring you a steak from the bistro we went to tonight to make up for it.
Lenny:
That’s a lot to unpack… Give me a second to write it all out .
Lenny:
I won’t pretend to know what happened between you two, but I do know that you’ve never dated, never shown an interest in anyone since Mom and Dad died. That’s not a way to live. If Arlo is showing up now, and his actions—not his words—show you he’s serious, then it’s worth risking a broken heart for. I may be basically a recluse now, but when I do see you, you’re happier than I’ve ever seen you. If shit with Tennison taught me anything, it’s that life doesn’t give you time. It doesn’t care if you’re scared or second-guessing things. It can all disappear at the drop of a hat. Keeping Arlo at arm’s length will only hurt you both more in the long run. It’s okay to be cautious, but don’t let good things slip through your fingers if they make you happy.
Lenny:
And what the fuck is this about a guy that’s basically stalking you? Does Ledger know?
I cringe at his second message. I didn’t think that one through, and with Arlo up my ass and basically babysitting me, the last thing I want is either brother to join in the fun. His other advice, however, calms my thoughts and sends clarity crashing through all my confusion. It also doesn’t lessen my sisterly guilt that he’s struggling more than any of us really know.
Me:
Big bro doesn’t know the new developments, and I’d like to keep it that way. Arlo is always overprotective enough for everyone. And you make some good points there, little brother. Thank you for talking me off a ledge and somehow making things clearer than they have been in years. It must be some kind of superpower you have.
Lenny:
No superpowers here, unfortunately. I’m glad it helped, though. You and Arlo are pretty good together, I guess.
I laugh at what I assume is a sullen tone and quickly quiet down, so I don’t wake up Arlo.
Me:
If you need anything, please, please call me, text me, send a letter, whatever. I know things are hard and it will take time, but we’re all here for you with whatever you need.
Lenny:
I know. I’m just not there yet, I think. You’ll be there first I bug when I’m ready, though, because this was dangerously close to girl talk.
Laughter bursts out of me, and I slap my hand over my mouth.
“What is going on over there?” Arlo’s groggy voice sounds out in the quiet room, loud enough for me to hear him .
“Sorry,” I whisper. “Go back to bed,” I say as I walk out of the bathroom and put my phone back on the nightstand as I get back into bed and snuggle against Arlo’s side, feeling more hopeful for the future than I have in fifteen years.