Chapter 73
CHAPTER SEVENTY-THREE
Briar
I lay unmoving, too stunned to react as Knox wrapped his arms around me, rolled to the side, and held me securely against him. I wanted to relax into him and savor this moment, but I couldn’t.
His breathing slowed; he was content to ignore that he’d branded me when I’d told him not to.
“You… you bit me,” I whispered.
Knox stirred and lifted his head. His breath warmed my shoulder as he gazed down at me. “So I did,” he murmured as if he hadn’t realized it.
“I told you not to. I told you to give me time.”
His shrug set my teeth on edge, and it took everything I had not to knee him in the nuts. There was no remorse in his eyes as they locked onto my shoulder. His lips twitched toward a smile while he examined his fresh marks on me.
That stupid idea of maybe having things change one day went up in smoke as my sex-fueled high gave way to reality. There was no maybe one day with this man; like my mother, he had no respect for me.
“My instincts took over.”
He said this as if it were a perfectly reasonable explanation. His flippant tone incensed me more than the fact he’d gone against my wishes.
“They didn’t take over the last time we were together!” I snapped.
“Didn’t they?” When he lifted my hand, I snatched it away from him. His jaw clenched as he grasped my wrist and turned it over. “I left bruises all over you, but there are none now. I was too rough with you last time because that was what the beast wanted. It was what I wanted too.”
“And this time, you violated my trust! I’d rather have you be too rough with me. I actually enjoy that!”
Something dark shimmered in his eyes. He licked my blood from his lips as his cock stirred against my hip. There was no way I was having sex with him again.
When I went to pull my wrist away, his arm locked around me and he kept me clasped against his chest. I stiffened, but I had to proceed very carefully here. Denying the beast could cause it to unleash, and I couldn’t risk that.
How had things gone from so amazing to so awful in the blink of an eye? Had I really contemplated staying here to see how things played out with him?
I was an idiot! He was never going to be Seth, and he would never respect me in the same way he once did. Knox was too damaged for that.
“You’re supposed to be gaining my trust, not betraying it,” I whispered.
“You already trust me to keep you safe. You know I’ll kill anyone who lays a hand on you.”
But who will protect me from you?
“That’s not… that’s not what building trust is about,” I told him.
“But it’s a start. You’ll grow to trust me more as time passes.”
I didn’t say anything as his fingers brushed the hair back from my shoulder. I winced when they grazed the wounds there. Despite my distress over his actions, satisfaction gleamed in his eyes.
How could I ever grow to trust him when all he ever did was what he wanted? He didn’t care about my feelings. If I stayed, he’d constantly trample them beneath his overbearing demeanor, and I couldn’t have that.
“Stay here,” he said. “I’ll be right back.”
He disentangled his arms from me before rising. With long strides, he stalked into the bathroom; the water ran for a couple of seconds before shutting off. Knox emerged with a wet towel and sat beside me on the bed.
“Sit up,” he said.
I didn’t have the energy to resist him. I felt too deflated. He was one more eternal in my life who didn’t give a shit about me. I was his mate, but he saw me more as his property… just like my mother.
The comparisons between them weren’t fair; she was far worse than he could ever be, but his regard for me as an individual was the same as hers. It was devastating.
Bracing my arms beneath me, I pushed myself up to sit beside him on the bed. When I did, he brushed back my hair and used the towel to gently clean the punctures.
“They’ll heal fast,” he said.
“I know.” I kept my head bowed as I stared at the floor. “I remember from last time.”
“Briar.” When I didn’t look at him, he grasped my chin and turned it toward him. “It was instinct.”
“I don’t believe you, and it doesn’t matter; you got what you wanted.”
Knox
Her words cut deeper than I’d anticipated as her gaze returned to the floor. When fresh blood welled from the punctures in her neck and shoulder, I pressed the towel against them.
She had every reason to doubt me; I wasn’t sure I believed me, but I hated the melancholy in her eyes. I had the beast under control… until I didn’t.
I didn’t recall biting her, but I’d never forget the rush of rightness I felt once my teeth pierced her flesh. She was mine, and every eternal would know she belonged to a shifter. They’d know to keep their hands off her, or I’d tear those hands from them.
But had I let the beast take control on purpose because we both wanted to brand her, or had it broken free?
It was silent within me, content to sleep now that I’d left my mark on her again. But I knew the answer without it telling me.
I’d claimed her because I wanted to. I’d kept the beast restrained while with her last time, and mostly restrained this time, but I let it mark her because it was what I craved too.
She’d told me no, and I’d promised her time and hadn’t given it to her. I should feel guilty about it; I didn’t. She was mine.
You truly are a selfish prick.
And I’d never deny it.
From now on, I would work to earn her trust and repair our relationship, but branding her again had brought me a sense of calm I hadn’t experienced in years.
I wouldn’t change any of it. I knew Briar hadn’t betrayed me, and I’d claimed her as my mate again; those were two things I’d spent years believing would never happen.
It’s better to ask for forgiveness than permission.
My father had told me that once. I hadn’t understood it at the time, but I did now. Things would be better, and I’d be more controlled now that this had happened. The rest would come with time.
I wiped away the blood a few more times before the bleeding ceased. The four red punctures of my new mark stood out starkly against her fair skin. The color would fade as they healed, but the scars would always remain.
My fingers grazed the old scars before coming to a stop beside the new ones. She winced, and when her head bowed, her hair fell forward to shield her beautiful features.
She turned her head away, refusing to look at me. Despite the angry set of her shoulders, sadness radiated from her as well.
I fucked up.
She’ll get over it. It’s Briar; somehow, despite everything her mother and I have done to her, she still possesses a kind soul. She’ll forgive me. She has to.
“I should return to my room,” she said.
When she started to rise from the bed, I grasped her wrist. “No.”
“Knox—”
“Stay with me.”
“You want me to stay with you when you wouldn’t stay with me?”
Those words drove another dagger into my heart, but they didn’t evoke my anger. I was too content for that.
“I left to protect you after leaving those bruises on you,” I told her.
“You know, you really should stop assuming things and exerting your will over me. Those bruises didn’t bother me. You didn’t go any further than I willingly let you go.”
“And now I know that.”
And now, maybe we can play a little bit more.
Briar stared at me before her shoulders slumped and she crawled onto the bed. She curled onto her side and propped her hands beneath her head. Her rigid body told me she’d prefer to be anywhere else, but when I lay down behind her, she closed her eyes and nestled into me.
She fit so perfectly against me. She may not like it, but her body couldn’t resist mine.
“I’ll always keep you safe,” I told her as I brushed the hair back from her face. “I’m never letting you go again.”
Her lashes fluttered, and she didn’t speak. An uneasy feeling settled in my stomach as her eyes closed once more. She’d forgive me; she had to… but for the first time, I wasn’t so certain she would.