Chapter 24 #2
“Don’t reminisce about what could have been.
It is a horrid torture.” Nathaniel’s thumb swept her cheek, wiping the drops away.
“These memories only hurt because they are filled with love. You loved your family, and they loved you,” he said deeply as she choked out another sob.
“Hold on to that. That demon, my mother, and all the Avery witches left in London will try to turn your soft heart into a weapon. You cannot let them.”
“But I miss my family,” she spluttered, a long guttural scream vibrating behind closed lips when the permanence of them never coming back sunk in. “They’re never coming back and I can’t breathe sometimes. It hurts too much, and I just want this to all be a dream. I want to go back.”
Panic settled in, setting her nerves on fire. Trying to suck in deep breaths, she gripped the covers, unable to fully inflate her lungs.
Nathaniel’s hands landed on her shoulders, and with wild eyes, he pulled her tight in an unexpected hug that elicited a gasp from her lips.
“I’m sorry,” he mumbled into her ear, cradling her head to his chest. She breathed in his intoxicating blend of musk and smoked wood, intermixed with fresh sweat.
Somewhere along the way, unbeknownst to her until that very second, it had become her favorite scent.
“I know this feels like you’re going to die,” he said. “It’s the worst kind of pain imaginable, but you will survive it. I promise.”
He held her for the next several minutes, stroking her hair as she screamed into a void of pain heating her from the inside. Even from the other side of the manor she could feel the demon's pull, but being in Nathaniel’s arms, listening to his heartbeat through his chest, grounded her.
She clutched the fabric of his white shirt and squeezed her eyes shut, knowing if anyone knew how she felt, it was the centuries old vampire who had outlived everyone he loved, who even had to kill his own mother to protect the slaughter of children.
Katherine cleared her throat and walked inside. “Am I interrupting?”
“Did you have it?” Nathaniel asked, warning lacing his tone.
Zachariah nodded, walking in behind her. “I watched her make it.”
“I’m not your enemy,” she stated.
Charlotte pulled back from Nathaniel, her brows creasing. They didn’t trust her either.
Katherine sighed. “The potion won’t work right away, but by morning, the hex should be gone. You can only hope the demon hasn’t attached itself too much already, because there’s no getting rid of that.”
“It’s not. The potion will work,” Nathaniel intoned.
“You almost sound concerned, Nathaniel,” she said, spite lacing each word.
He didn’t respond. Instead, he grabbed the vial of golden, bubbling liquid from her hands and brought it to Charlotte’s lips. “Trust me,” he said when she flinched. “It’s safe.”
She winced, breathing in the strong, perfumed scent. “How do you know?”
Zachariah answered this time. “Because Katherine won’t risk the lives of her family.”
Wide-eyed, she gasped, looking at Nathaniel. “You threatened her family?”
“From the very beginning,” he said unapologetically.
No wonder Katherine acted suspiciously. She didn’t even want to be there.
Her next question was lost in a wave of anguish. Desperate, she grabbed the vial and tipped the contents down her throat, the cloying liquid burning her esophagus on the way down.
Katherine tilted her head, watching carefully. “I’ll check on Gertrude again and strengthen the barrier spell.”
Nathaniel nodded once, letting out a sigh when she left. He looked at Zachariah and said, “We will manage now. You can go home.”
Zachariah nodded and left the room in a hurry, along with Katherine.
Once they were alone, Charlotte hunched over, wincing against ripples of pain tearing over her spine. “This potion is like liquid fire.”
“I know,” he said, brushing back a lock of her hair. “It’s just one night you have to get through, and then it’ll be over.”
She bit her lip, exhaustion rippling through her. “I need to lie down. Will you stay with me?”
He brushed his thumb against her cheek as she slowly closed her eyes. “Yes.”
“I still need to talk to you about your gift,” she added with a yawn, letting him know she hadn’t forgotten that chest he left at her door. Although she had told him she regretted not killing Charles, so she couldn’t truly be angry at him doing it.
“Charles disrespected you and your family,” he drawled as she edged into a slumber. “He deserved it.”
“I shouldn’t have said anything.”
“I would have killed him even if you didn’t,” he added with a brush of his fingers through her hair.
“Yes, but…” A yawn cut her off and she rolled onto her side.
“His death is on my hands, not on yours,” he promised, whispering reassuring words into her ear as she slowly passed out.
A searing pain shot through her forehead, right between her eyes, making her groan and squeeze her eyes shut.
Nathaniel’s fingers squeezed tighter around hers. “I’m not going anywhere. You can get through this. Just hold on for a few more hours.”
Those words shouldn’t have been reassuring.
If the hex didn’t kill her, he eventually would.
Even if he didn’t want to. Alexander had even said he ended up murdering the lovers he’d blood bonded with.
Yet, she couldn’t help but hope. He had offered her a way out, even though her chances of winning The Hunt were low.
“What about the ritual you want me to do?” she asked, voice cracking.
“Let us not think of that right now.”
“Will you hold me?” she asked faintly when she felt the urge to lose herself in another memory came over her.
The bed dipped when he climbed into bed next to her, his body pressing hard against hers.
She wanted to believe that every time that night, as the hours bled together, when Nathaniel pulled her tighter against him, that it meant more to him.
But he couldn’t feel those things. Alexander had said as much.
It was all in her imagination and since arriving at Sallow Manor, she had allowed herself to fall victim to the very thing she’d been warned against, even by Nathaniel himself.
She had grown to like him, to desire him even, to think of him constantly.
When he pulled away and left her alone in the bed to greet Katherine, she ached to have him close again.
His voice resonated in her ears. “Is there anything that can ease her suffering?” While Charlotte couldn’t see Katherine, she assumed the worst judging by Nathaniel’s groan.
“There is not. I’m sorry. Is she asleep?” Katherine asked.
“I think so.”
“I can take over, so you don’t have to be alone with her.”
“No.” The sharp edge in his tone made her heart race. “I can watch her.”
“What about the bond?” Katherine protested. “You have been alone with her for hours already.”
“I’ve got it under control.” His tone teetered on dangerous, and Charlotte wondered if he actually did.
God, she wished she could know the true extent of how he felt. If he even thought of her like that? At least focusing on her confusing flutter of feelings was distracting her from the nausea and pain sweeping through her body in slow, but relentless waves.
After a few minutes, the hex deepened, clawing into her very soul, and the agony became so much worse.
She was used to pain. Even on her best days, it was there.
In fact, she could barely remember a time when she wasn’t in some level of pain, but the hex was another level of torture, stealing her words and breath with the jabs of sharpness that made her want to die just so she wouldn’t have to feel this anymore.
Something warm jumped beside her on the bed. Duke snuggled against her stomach, his paws on her abdomen, and she burst into tears, drawing the attention of both Nathaniel and Katherine.
His soft meow was everything in that moment, pulling her back from the darkest fingers of her thoughts. Claws extended gently against her nightgown, his wet nose nudged her chin when she contemplated giving up.
The pain was lessening. Only a smidge, but enough that she no longer wanted to throw herself from the window just for some relief. Once Katherine left, Nathaniel returned to hold her, his head hitting the pillow as he wrapped his arms tightly around her. “It’s not long left now.”
“Can you give me some of your blood?” she asked when the hex mark burned with a fresh wave of heat.
“I don’t know if it will help with this kind of pain.”
“Please,” she said faintly. “I need something. Anything.”
“Okay. Hold on.” With a heavy exhale, he brought his thumb to his fangs and pierced his skin. “Here.”
He pressed his finger to her lips, painting them with crimson. She licked them away, sucking gently for more until she felt it coat her tongue.
She shifted her body until her head was resting against his chest until she could hear the steady thrum of his heart. Clinging to him weakly, with closed eyes, she murmured, “Thank you for staying with me.”
She swore she heard his heart skip a beat but was too tired to think too much into it.