Chapter 25
Chapter Twenty-Five
FREYA
“You seriously need to hold still, or else I’m never gonna get an accurate measurement,” I huff.
Harvey blinks up at me as I try to hold the tape measure around his little rabbit-belly.
He squirms, giving me a nose-twitch, and then jumping off the couch.
“Hey!” I call after him as he disappears back into his hutch.
“Harvey! You’re going to look so cute! Stop fighting me on this! ”
He sticks his head out and I could swear that he’s scowling at me right now. I frown, dropping the tape measure next to the yarn I have laid out. I’ll get him eventually. That rabbit is too cute to leave my apartment without a tiny sweater.
I grab my phone, a flutter of anticipation waking as I check to see if Oscar’s messaged me, the same way it has for the last three days. There’s been nothing from him yet, but I’ve been watching the news for word about the fire and it seems like they have things mostly under control.
The apartment feels too quiet. I need to do something that’s not sitting here worrying about him. My fingers take me to Elsie’s contact without much thought. I haven’t spoken to her since Oscar took me to her house. She’s gonna freak out when I tell her everything that’s happened since then.
She answers after one ring. “Little Peach!”
“Hey, Els, is now a good time?”
“It’s always a good time for you. You doing alright?”
Isn’t that the question. I feel like I’ve been turned upside down and now I don’t know which way is forward.
“I’m okay.” I sigh. “Just a lot going on.”
“This wouldn’t happen to be about that strapping young man of yours, would it?” How does she always know?
“He’s not my man,” I splutter out.
“You sure?” She chuckles. “He seemed pretty smitten.”
I squeeze my eyes shut. Harvey shuffles in the corner. “We went on a date?”
“Oh yeah?” she asks gently. “How was that?”
“Scary,” I grumble.
Elsie sighs. She saw me after I left Connecticut, the state I was in after Aaron. I didn’t tell her everything that happened, but she probably got the idea. “Well, that’s to be expected, but you did it anyway,” she says. “Did you have fun?”
“Yeah, it was… nice.”
She snorts a laugh. “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”
“It’s a confusing thing.”
“What’s confusing?”
“I just… I don’t know.” I flop an arm over my face.
“We went out for one lunch, then he tried to kiss me and I panicked, but he was actually really nice about it, then I didn’t see him for a couple days, but then he showed up at my apartment asking me to watch his rabbit, and that time he did kiss me and it was kind of amazing, and now he’s off fighting a wildfire and what if he’s dead? ”
“Freya, take a breath, sweetheart.”
I do as she says, feeling a little dizzy after my rant, and relax back into the couch as my head stops spinning.
“I just feel like it’s going really fast,” I mumble.
“It’s only one kiss.”
“But it was a really good kiss.”
She laughs. “That’s a good thing!”
“I guess…”
“Then, why do you sound so miserable about it?”
I chew the inside of my lip. “It’s all kind of a lot. It would be so much easier if I didn’t like him.”
“What would?”
I stare up at the ceiling, listening to Harvey as Elsie waits patiently. “Do you think he’s a good guy?”
She sighs. “Oh, Little Peach…”
Tears prick at the backs of my eyes. “I don’t know how to be sure,” I whisper.
“Nobody’s ever sure, that’s what makes it a risk.”
“But I’m not ready to take a risk.”
“Of course you are, look at yourself. You moved across the country, you’re living your own life. What’s that if it’s not the biggest risk possible? Going on a couple of dates with a sweet man will be a cake walk compared to that.”
“You like him, right?” I ask.
“I’ve always thought he was a wonderful young man, but it doesn’t matter what I think.”
“Okay…” I glance down at the carpet, where Harvey is plodding around my living room. “But do you not think it’s a bit intense to ask me to take care of his rabbit?”
“Sounds to me that he was just in a bind, and you’re somebody he trusts to help him out.”
“Yeah?”
“Yes. I wouldn’t read too much into it.”
God, I miss her so much it hurts. But she’s right where she needs to be, even if it means that I’m doing this all alone. “Love you, Els.”
“Love you too. Now if you’re done with me, I have a baby to get back to. I got roped into watching him again.”
“Date night?”
“When isn’t it?” Even though she’s acting put out, I can hear the smile. “You call me anytime if you need me, but you’ve got this.”
“Alright, speak to you soon.”
“Bye, sweets!”
“Have fun! Don’t teach him any bad words!” I call as she hangs up.
That’s one lucky kid.
I check the time, wondering if I should just call it a night, but it’s still only eight thirty.
Harvey darts across the living room, making me jump enough that my phone flies out of my hand, landing next to me on the couch with a soft thud.
The screen lights up with the impact and I see that sometime during that call, Oscar texted.
Scrambling to grab the device, I open his message.
OSCAR
How’s my son?
I grin, my chest warming at seeing his name. Fuck, I am in so much trouble.
FREYA
Your son just scared the shit out of me.
OSCAR
Has he got the zoomies?
FREYA
I thought only dogs did that.
OSCAR
Harv’s in a league of his own
FREYA
I’m figuring that out.
I tap my fingernail against the side of my phone.
FREYA
How are you?
OSCAR
Good
Well, mostly good
FREYA
What’s wrong?
Worry lances through me. Is he hurt?
OSCAR
Just tired. Missing home.
And you
Missing you a lot
My breath hitches. I miss him so much it scares me.
I’ve never wanted someone in my space like this before, to be with me in the quiet moments.
I usually like my solitude too much to let anyone close, but I want him.
It gnaws at me. I don’t want to need him, I don’t want to give him the power to hurt me if he walks away, but I worry that the choice is being taken out of my hands.
FREYA
I really miss you too.
OSCAR
I’m sorry I haven’t been in touch. Things have been a little crazy
FREYA
Is it all going okay?
OSCAR
As okay as it can be. We’ve stopped the spread from heading toward any residential areas and we’re at something like 65% containment
FREYA
Is that good?
OSCAR
It’s not bad. Most of our job is to stop it spreading, then it should burn itself out in time.
I’ve been clearing shrubs and trees to cut in a fire line
FREYA
So you’re not actually putting it out?
OSCAR
We wouldn’t be able to if we tried. You can’t always fight these things.
Isn’t that the truth.