Chapter 40 #3
“He still has some issues, but we’re working through them.
” He turned in time to see Austin holding Steve in a chokehold.
“They’ve all been helping him. He hasn’t had one of his episodes in a while, and whenever he does, we know how to calm him down.
The terrible shit he went through isn’t just gonna disappear, but he knows he’s safe, and that’s really all he needs. ”
“What about you?” I asked. “It seems like we don’t ever get a chance to talk anymore.”
He paused for a moment and smiled. “I’m in a good place, too.” He pointed to Roscoe. “You two say the L word yet?”
That familiar pang in my stomach returned, and I looked away. Roscoe opened his mouth to say something but was cut off by a woman’s voice.
Willa led the way, her bare white skin almost glowing in the moonlight as she skipped through the grass, her perfect breasts bouncing in time with her cadence. Mosavi followed closely, also naked. They both took their places by the fire.
“Okay, so why are we all naked?” I asked.
“Because it’s fun and natural,” Willa said, shaking her chest playfully at me. “Embrace it, you two.” She glanced over at an uncomfortably annoyed Mosavi before looking back at me. “He doesn’t often go out without clothes either.”
“Only animals do this,” he grumbled.
Willa turned back to her husband. “Do I look like an animal to you?”
He huffed in annoyance before letting out a defeated, “No.”
“Well, looks like everyone’s here,” Roscoe said before turning back to the other four still scuffling. “You guys, get over here. I got some good stuff.” He pulled out a familiar pouch and gave that signature shitty grin.
“Oh, hell no!” I shouted, starting to stand, but Roscoe snatched my arm, pulling me back down.
“I second that motion,” Mosavi shouted, trying to scoot away from the fire, but it was too late. Roscoe grabbed a handful of the herb before throwing it into the pit.
The flames erupted into a deep blue as thick white smoke poured outward, engulfing us all. The effects were immediate, turning the darkness to neon day, colorful hallucinations fluttering around us.
“Mmmm,” Roscoe hummed, contentedly closing his eyes while swaying from side-to-side. “Shoulda brought some music.”
“I’ll grab the guitar,” Darryl said, attempting to stand but stumbling before falling back to the ground. He lay there, sprawled on his back for a solid minute before muttering a slurred, “Never mind.”
“I hate you so much,” Mosavi said through his teeth, his dangerous glare fixed on Roscoe. “I just want to…” Slowly, his facial expression went from hostile to the same squinty-eyed laughter the others were experiencing. “I just want to hug you until you stop breathing.”
“I feel left out,” Willa muttered, trying to inhale more of the smoke that obviously had no effect. “At least this is fun to watch.”
“Hey.”
The voice next to me sent a shudder through my body.
It wasn’t as deep, but it had the same warmth.
I turned toward Roscoe, but he wasn’t Roscoe.
This visage of him was half-turned as he wore his now oversized orange hoodie.
He had messy silvery-black hair and a scruffy beard, his thickly muscled body covered in the same colored hair that was on his head, only with visible tan skin.
His canines were still longer and sharper, but the rest of his teeth looked more human. His ears were larger and pointy, just like when Austin had reverted to his half-turn form.
“Roscoe?”
“I never showed this to nobody before.” He pulled me into his lap before wrapping me in his hoodie. “Nobody’s ever been worth bein’ vulnerable around, but you make me feel this way every day.”
“Is this the drugs? Last time it gave you an overabundance of nipples.”
“Nah.” He propped his scruffy chin up on my shoulder as he continued whispering in my ear. “I know why you’ve been holdin’ back. Yer afraid of turnin’ ‘cause of me. Yer still afraid that once you turn, I won’t like you no more.”
A slight nausea turned my stomach as I tried to push those thoughts away.
“Cody… I love you. And I’ll love you no matter what. That’s a promise I ain’t ever gonna break.”
The blue flames turned a watery blur as tears distorted everything a little more.
“You been waitin’ for me to say it, but I didn’t know how.” He hugged me tighter. “This is the way it shoulda been, so don’t be afraid of it no more.”
The dam inside of me crumbled as my body went completely warm.
Every inch of flesh tingled, and everyone around the fire stared wide-eyed in anticipation.
Roscoe was right. I felt like I wanted to pull off my old, human skin, and stand in the moonlight reborn.
For the first time in my life, there was a joy in my chest that radiated in bursts so powerful that I didn’t want it to end.
Roscoe pulled away as my bones popped, the sensation dropping me to the ground until all I could see was the moon overhead.
This should have been painful, but there wasn’t pain, just a strange sensation of growth as my body expanded over the grass.
My once short tail grew longer, jutting well past my inner thighs.
I held my right hand up in front of me, the now silver moon illuminating the transformation as thick, brown fur spread, the skin on my palms hardening into black pads, hooked claws growing longer.
As my arm dropped to the side of my new body, I kept my gaze up at the sky while Roscoe’s werewolf face came into view, looking down at me. He smiled at first, but then his expression turned to horror.
“Oh, goddamn it.”
I sat up suddenly when I heard the howls break out from the distance.
“Aw shit!” Roscoe shouted.
I understood how Roscoe felt. The others around me began howling, and Roscoe struggled to contain it. Before I could say anything, my snout pointed up to the sky and a powerful howl shook everything around us.
That was me? It sounded so clean and strong—and deep.
“Oh my God—” Roscoe’s words were interrupted as a shaky, gag-like howl left his maw.
Mosavi’s howl joined mine, just as strong and clean.
Roscoe’s intermittent cursing between howls made me want to burst out laughing, but I couldn’t.
The involuntary instinct continued for several more minutes before finally subsiding.
Roscoe was kind of right. It was like throwing up, but at least it felt good.
Everyone huddled in close, except for Mosavi, who stood back with Willa. He was completely out of it with a goofy, distant look, his tongue hanging out as his wife stroked his head between his ears.
“I, uh—” I paused, taking in the new timbre of my voice. It was so deep, almost bestial. “I—” Speaking was a struggle with the new mouth and flatter tongue, but every wall inside of me turned to dust before disappearing into the autumn wind.
I could say it. There was nothing left to hold it back. I’d walked through fire just to end up a better person on the other side, surrounded by family while wrapped in the arms of someone who actually loved me.
As I sat up with my head higher than it had ever been before, I turned to Roscoe and pushed him to the ground under my added weight.
“I love you, too. For the rest of my life.”
Roscoe never really cried that much, but he fell to pieces in my arms as if the weight of the world vanished. It really was a beautiful life—we just needed to see it for what it was so we could enjoy it.
Only when it’s darkest can we truly see the stars.