Chapter 20
twenty
The following night, Just Friends plays on our TV because Miles and I watch it every year religiously during the month of December—usually more than once.
“You know,” Miles says as he stretches out on our couch like a lazy house cat. “Your favorite Christmas movie isn’t that Christmassy.”
I frown. “Sure, it is. There’s caroling, Christmas parties, elaborate light displays.”
“Yeah, but that’s all frilly shit. The movie is barely about Christmas at all. You’re just a sucker for love.”
Taking a sip of my wine, I shake my head. “I’m a sucker for Ryan Reynolds.”
Miles stares at the screen. “Aren’t we all?” My phone buzzes, and he looks at it with an eyebrow raised. “Is that him?”
I reach for my phone. I don’t think it’s Chase. He already told me he’s working late tonight. It’s the group chat I have with my parents.
Mom:
We were starting to get down about the house not being decorated, so we decided to pack!
Dad:
The neighbors were asking about the toy shop, and when I told them we were going on a cruise this year instead, they looked devastated.
Mom:
Your father can’t live with that type of guilt.
Dad:
I’m tempted to set it up even though we won’t be here.
Mom:
Don’t be ridiculous! It’s too much work!
A chuckle escapes me as I type back my response.
Candace:
This is a much-needed break for you two. The neighbors will be fine.
“Hey,” I say, bringing my attention back to Miles. “My parents booked a cruise this year and won’t be hosting Christmas.”
Miles lifts his head. “Where was my invite?”
“Oh, we were both invited,” I assure him. “To a week-long wellness detox retreat.”
His face scrunches.
“Yeah. We were both busy. You’re welcome.”
He gives a two-finger salute before letting his head flop back on the couch. “Have fun Bill and Pat.”
My phone goes off again.
Mom:
Plus, who knows how many years are left before you settle down and have your own little candy canes. Then we’ll have to go big every year!
I don’t respond, and neither does my dad. He’s probably scolding my mother in person because they know how I feel about having kids. It doesn’t matter how many times I try to explain how that lifestyle isn’t for me, my mom is convinced I’ll change my mind, and my dad is hopeful she’s right.
With a slight shake of my head, I put my phone down and try to separate myself from what I’m feeling. “So anyway, it will just be the two of us,” I say to Miles.
When he doesn’t respond right away, I look up and can’t fight my smile as I watch him ignore me to text the guy he’s been seeing. “So, is this thing between you two exclusive?”
He tilts his head from side to side. “On my end, yes. On his? I don’t know. I think so. Like I said, he’s kind of new to this, so I don’t think he has the boys lined up.”
I sigh dreamily and clasp my hands under my chin. “If only I could meet this mystery man . . .”
Miles scoffs. “He’s not that much of a mystery. He’s an accountant from Apopka, but you’ll love him.”
“I’m sure I will.” I take another sip of my wine.
He raises his eyebrows and quietly mutters, “Not as much as you love Daddy Chase, but . . .”
I nearly choke and have to cough through my last sip. “Would you stop calling him that?” I manage to get out. It’s the only way he has referred to Chase since meeting him.
“No,” he answers flatly as he sits up so he can look me square in the eyes. “You don’t even deserve him at this point. You went on a date with a man who looks like that, and all that happened between you was a kiss on the cheek? What are you, twelve?” He shakes his head. “You should have. Ridden . That. Dick.” The last three words come out deep and rough.
“I told you, it’s not like that.”
Miles rolls his eyes hard enough that his whole head rolls with them. “Please. I saw the way he looked at you in that dress.” He points a finger at me. “And I’ve seen you work your magic on guys before. You’re fucking hot when you want to be. You could have seduced him.”
I know I’ve been different with Chase—more cautious than I usually am when I’m interested in someone, but that’s because I don’t want to be interested in him. I’m actively trying very hard not to have feelings for him that go beyond thinking he’s attractive. “What would be the point?”
We lock eyes and as soon as it registers what he’s about to say, I quickly add, “And do not say anything about?—”
But Miles has already yelled, “HIS DICK.”
I shake my head with a laugh, but he isn’t finished.
“His big, thick, Daddy Chase dick that is probably just as beautiful as the rest of him.”
I can’t stop laughing. “You’ve thought about this a lot, haven’t you?”
With a slow shake of his head, Miles says, “The things I would do to that man.”
I snap my fingers in front of his face. “Hey. Accountant in Apopka. Stay with me.”
He blinks. “Right. What were we talking about?”
“How about we talk about you helping me find a dress? We’re officially one week out from this party.”
Miles taps his fingers on his bearded chin. “Sunday?” Looking at me, he adds, “I mean, you’re working tomorrow anyway, and I’ll be doing dirty things to an Apopka accountant.”
“As you should. Sunday is great. ”
My phone vibrates next to me, and I hope it’s not my mother with more life planning advice.
Chase:
I have never been so happy to see my couch. What are you doing?
I snap a quick picture of our movie night. There’s still a half-eaten pizza sitting in the box on our coffee table from earlier.
Chase:
You and pizza? I hope Miles knows how good he has it.
Even with the pineapple.
I bite back my smile, and Miles says, “You’re so in love it’s disgusting.”
I grab the pillow next to me and toss it at him before typing my next response.
Candace:
Rough day?
Chase:
Somewhat. My boss only cares about planning this stupid party, so everything else is left for me. I had to personally reach out to four clients she’s supposed to oversee because they haven’t heard from her in weeks.
I can’t stand this woman. Chase already said his job was stressful without the added chaos of his boss wanting to become an event coordinator.
Candace:
This woman is quickly becoming one of my least favorite people.
Chase:
She’s not all bad.
But this time of year undoubtedly brings out the worst in her.
“Ask him if you can take him for a ride,” Miles says flatly in the background.
My head snaps up. He’s being ridiculous.
“Just to get a feel,” he adds casually. “You know, before the party.”
Ignoring him, I turn back to my phone.
Candace:
Of course. I’m sure she’s lovely in the summer months.
Thankfully, for the rest of the night, there’s no further talk of how well-endowed Miles thinks Chase must be. He puts on an anime show while I scroll through different types of dresses on my phone, but we mostly talk through it all, and by the time I head into my room for the night, I only find it a little weird that Chase never messaged me back.
I mean, it’s a Friday night. He could be doing anything—he could even be with a woman for all I know. My stomach tightens at the thought of him with his hand on another woman’s leg while he whispers in her ear. I just imagine him venturing his hand up further than he did with me. Maybe I should have played into this whole practice thing more. Maybe Miles is right, and I should have participated just as much.
I swallow hard and swipe my phone open. It’s been over three hours since I heard from him. It’s not like we text on a constant schedule, but he seemed a little down earlier, and now that I’m alone in my room, it’s eating at me. Because if he’s not out on the town with some gorgeous blonde woman I imagine being much prettier than me, maybe he’s upset. Maybe he took offense to my last comment about his boss . . .
I doubt that’s the case. Even if I did upset him, I think he would still talk to me. I’m biting my thumb as a stare down at the screen, debating if I should text him again.
Or I could call him.
The initial thought spikes my panic, but the more I think about it, the more I want to hear his voice. I’ll be able to tell so much from hearing him. It’s not like we’ve never spoken on the phone.
Before I can talk myself out of it, I hit the call button.