Chapter 12 The Dinner Party #2
“What the heck is kapsnup?” Jessica asks pointedly,
I reply happily, “Oh, it’s a sausage and cabbage soup, we made it the other—”
“Cabbage and sausage!” she cuts me off. “Why would anyone eat that? Did they want to get fat and bloated?”
Looking down at my soup, I take a spoonful. Fat and bloated is better than eating something that looks like dishwater and has only a bit more flavor.
Jessica proceeds to monopolize Jake in conversation, and Vee is politely listening to another Oliver story.
Carol looks like she would rather start a conversation with the maid than with me, so I sit quietly, feeling dampness under my armpits.
The ability to form words and speak seems to have completely escaped me.
Finally, remembering Carol’s bird feeder in Jake’s room, I turn to Carol and ask, “Uhm, have you seen any interesting birds lately at your feeder?”
Carol turns her icy stare on me, and I shrink in my seat unsure of what I’ve done.
“Oh, Emma,” Jake suddenly says, “I saw the same palm warbler we spotted heading to Vee’s. At least I assume it was the same one as it’s strange that one is still hanging around this time of year.”
I throw Jake a grateful nod, glad he saved me from Carol’s confusing reaction. I feel the warmth from the glow of his warm brown eyes. “It is late for a palm warbler. When we saw that other one, I checked my book—normally they are gone by now.”
Jake nods in agreement. “So, what birds have you seen lately on your walks?”
“Oh, just on the walk over here, I saw a blue jay and a northern cardinal.” I reply enthusiastically, “Nothing out of the ordinary but still lovely.”
Jessica lets out a little huff and my heart warms that Jake is trying to save me by talking about the one topic he knows I love.
I’m still confused as to why Carol isn’t joining in as I remember Jake mentioning the bird feeder in his room was hers so she must like birds.
But Jake’s interest is enough to stop the flop sweats and get my brain reconnected to my lips.
Jake leans across the table toward me and whispers dramatically, “I hear there’s a snowy owl in the park, down from Canada for the winter. You should be on the lookout for it.”
I clasp my hands at my chest and my eyes widen. “Really! Oh, I’ve never seen any owls, never mind a snowy one.”
Carol clears her throat and gives the maid a terse nod of her head. The maid jumps forward and clears the soup bowls, and then she starts delivering the food from the kitchen. It is some sort of fish in a cream sauce with sweet potato and a green vegetable on the side.
“What kind of vegetable is this?” I ask politely.
Jessica responds with distain dripping from her voice, “Broccoli rabe.”
I don’t think she said idiot, but she certainly implied it. I’m glad I recognize the sweet potato side dish, although it has some sort of little round red seeds or kernels mixed up in it. I certainly will not be asking what those are.
As we begin to eat, conversation stops, and the room gets quiet.
The trickle of sweat restarts under my arms and grows as no one so much as scrapes a fork or lets a knife touch their plate.
I can’t wait for this dinner to be over.
I can’t believe I was looking forward to it.
No wonder Jake wanted us to save him. I think back to the last time I stopped at my parents’ for a quick visit, where I sat in my regular chair, and we enjoyed a pork dinner.
I didn’t think anything of it then, but right now I would give my right arm to be over there instead of here, trying to keep out of the dangerous quicksand that seems to surround this table.
I’m halfway through my meal, and it tastes pretty good compared to the soup, when Carol asks sweetly, “Jake, do you have anyone to take to your father’s charity event? It’s next week you know.”
Jake grimaces and Jessica smiles widely.
It dawns on me that Jessica must be the girl Jake’s parents want him to marry, and everything suddenly becomes clear.
It’s not that they don’t like me, they just didn’t want anyone who may be competition for Jessica.
I’m relieved as I know I’m not competition.
How could I be? She’s smart, polished, well educated, maybe a little unfriendly, but certainly a good match for Doctor Jake.
I’m sure they know the same people, because according to Carol, they both grew up summering at the Hamptons and traveling in the same circles.
My stomach sours when I glance over at Jessica.
While I’m mulling all of this over, I stretch my legs to get the muscles to relax a bit when I hit something solid with my foot—which is bare, as I’ve slipped my shoes off under the table.
Jake’s twinkling eyes meet mine and I blush again.
I pull my legs back, slipping my feet quickly back into my shoes.
Carol pushes her plate forward a few inches, even though it’s still half full, and drops her napkin onto the food.
Standing, Jake takes his plate, which is completely clean, reaches for his mother’s plate, and plops it on top of his.
While I normally would never leave food on my plate at my house, I decide if this will get me out of this place sooner, I’ll gladly waste some food just this once.
Picking up my plate, I reach for Vee’s as I stand.
Jake takes Jessica’s plate, looking a little worried about the two dishes already stacked in his left hand.
I expertly stack Vee’s on top of mine and place Oliver’s on top of that.
I move the silverware to my other hand, so I can carry the bowl of purple dotted sweet potatoes, and I head to the kitchen right behind Jake.
Walking past Carol, I catch her eye, and she gives me a cold stare.
Oh Lord, what did I do now? Maybe I shouldn’t be helping clear, but I’ve done it a thousand times at my house, so it’s an automatic response. Ugh, maybe she thinks I’m trying to get Jake alone. I bite my lip as I enter the kitchen.
Jake glances at the neat tower in my one hand and large casserole dish in the other and remarks, “Show off.”
Grinning, I immediately feel better, glad there is a little distance between me and the icy stares.
The maid is toiling over a large mixer and a lovely smell fills the kitchen.
I sniff appreciatively, it is some concoction of vanilla, cream, and sugar.
Looking up from the noisy machine, she jumps when she spots us.
Panic rises in her eyes. She leaps toward us grabbing the plates.
Jake fends her off, stating firmly, “Maria, we’re fine.
We’ll just put them in the sink. You keep doing what you’re doing, it smells divine. ”
The fancy coffee maker is bubbling and hissing. Jake sets his plates down and grabs a cup from the nearby shelf and starts rummaging around. Finally, he asks, “So, where do we keep the tea bags?”
Beaming, I gush, “Oh, that is so nice, right over here.”
I reach up and take down a box of chamomile tea, and Jake fills up a cup with hot water from the coffee contraption. He gestures for me to lead the way back to the dining room.
I forget all about the cold stares waiting for me until I sit back down at the table.
Jake slides my teacup into the middle of my placemat and then goes over to the other side to sit down.
Carol looks ready to explode. I realize it looks strange that Jake served me tea while everyone else is waiting for the maid to bring coffee.
I stare at my tea, wondering if I will be able to drink a sip under these tense circumstances.
Thankfully, the maid bustles in with a tray with the cups filled with coffee and creamers and sugars.
Carol turns to me and bites off, “Cream or sugar for your tea?”
Shaking my head, I try to take a sip. Carol’s eyes narrow and I wonder if I should have said yes for some reason. As the maid returns with fluffy confections in fancy wine glasses, I state, “The meal was just delicious. I loved everything.”
Carol pins me with a stare for a quick second and pointedly turns to Jake, “So, what is going on with school?”
She says the word school like it’s offensive, indicating that she prefers discussing something offensive over responding to me.
I take a small scoop of the dessert, and it melts in my mouth.
I take a bigger spoonful. I could eat the whole thing and then some, but Jessica is staring at me and just playing with her dessert, taking small spoonfuls. I set my spoon down, disappointed.
Jake quirks his eyebrow in my direction and cajoles, “Come on, eat the rest. It’s heavenly, isn’t it? Like eating a cloud.”
Smiling, I pick up my spoon again and take a big scoop, feeling defiant.
Rich people are so wasteful and kind of miserable.
They can’t even enjoy the most marvelous dessert ever.
Maybe my beige apartment down the hall isn’t as pathetic as I’ve always thought it was.
Jake nods encouragingly, so I take another scoop and a sip of my tea. My back muscles relax a little.
Suddenly, Vee places her napkin on the table and says loudly, “Carol, Oliver, this was absolutely marvelous. Can’t thank you enough. But Emma and I have an early shoot tomorrow, so we need to get our beauty sleep.”
I look at Vee in confusion; tomorrow is a day off. She faces me and winks, then smoothly pulls me up by my hand. She seems to have had enough of Oliver’s stories.
Glad I caught on, I stand obediently and bob my head in agreement as Vee continues to say what a lovely time we had.
We’re collecting our coats in the guest room when Jake emerges from his room with his coat on.
“We’re all heading out together,” he says brightly. “Safety in numbers.”
I’m not sure what happened after Vee and I left the room, but something did. Jessica is now standing with her coat on, and we all walk out the door and pile out onto Fifth Avenue. Jake takes command and we head down a few blocks and take a right.
He declares with a forced smile, “Ah, here’s Jessica’s place. Hey, have a nice night.”
I offer a sincere, “Nice to meet you,” and before Jessica can say more than a quick goodbye, we turn in sync and head back the way we came. I didn’t realize I was holding my breath until I let it out in a whoosh.
Jake lets out a hoot and exclaims, “Amen sister. My God that sucked. I really owe you guys one.”
Vee snorts. “It wasn’t that bad. Seeing them trying to figure out the Emma thing was kinda fun. Boy, the tea delivery really was a nice touch. They’re probably throwing away every damn tea bag in the house right now so it can never happen again.”
Vee gives out a gleeful woohoo and Jake smirks.
Stopping in the middle of the sidewalk, I demand, “What is going on? I mean I figured out halfway through dinner that Jessica is who your parents want you to marry, but why am I involved? I didn’t mean to cause trouble.”
Jake looks sheepish, “You didn’t do a thing to cause trouble. They just keep pushing Jessica on me, and can you imagine? Ugh, Jessica in bed would be like the fish we just suffered through—lukewarm and a little mushy.”
Vee snorts a loud laugh. “Exactly.”
I’m still mystified but I can’t help but smile at the fish comparison. Vee tucks her arm in mine and her other in Jake’s and marches down the sidewalk. We walk through Central Park, but unfortunately, no nightbirds are calling.
“Remember to keep your eyes peeled for snowy owls,” Jake says. “They can sometimes be seen perched atop a post or telephone pole or broken-off tree.”
This distracts me from my thoughts of Jessica; how thrilling it would be to see a snowy owl.
As the darkness surrounds us, I feel a connection that is more than just our linked arms. These two are my friends.
I scan the shadows looking for the elusive owl and the contentment in my chest simmers softly inside me.
A picture of Jake’s dancing eyes when he was encouraging me to eat the fluffy dessert flashes through my mind.
When I’m back alone in my room, I can’t stop myself from running the whole dreadful evening over in my mind.
I clearly see how unsophisticated I am compared to everyone else who was at the table.
The cold stares, awkward conversations and my many missteps make my heart feel heavy in my chest. How am I going to survive the Vogue party?
I fall asleep feeling depressed, but the reappearance of my special dream assuages those feelings:
Flying over the most wonderful forest, the trees are first below me, until I swoop in between the branches finding small pockets of space to cruise. Everything smells of earth and life.
Now I’m down on the ground, transformed into a human, picking my way along a faint trail, and there is the fluttering of wings and flashes of movement up in the dark canopy of the forest. Owls on their silent wings keep me company as I search for something.
I look up ahead. I know my true love is there, just out of view, ready to protect me.
Awakening, I lie still, letting my dream wrap itself around me like a pair of strong arms. My dream morphed a little and somehow connected our walk back to Vee’s last night into the story.
The feeling of belonging and comfort that I’ve always found in my dream, I realize I was feeling on our walk last night.
I get up and flip the page of my calendar. Time is so fickle. Until now, my life plodded along, but these last two weeks have flown. I’m going to need to try to slow down time. Is that even possible?