Chapter 1 #2
“Never, and I’ve asked nothing short of a million times.
The way my mom spoke about her hometown, you’d think it was haunted.
She called it a place that was forbidden and not to be discussed.
She always told me that for my protection she wouldn’t talk about it.
Even though she’d grown up there and both of my grandparents and dad were buried there, she told me it was in my best interest to let it be and to stay as far away from there as possible. ”
Julian’s concerned expression gave that eerie vibe that I always got whenever my mom would say those things to me.
He lowly responded, “Maybe it is haunted to her. Your mom was a very wise and sensible woman and that place harbors her most deeply painful moments. I could see why she wouldn’t want to go back and why she would want to keep you from being there.
Just looking through some of these old pictures from there, it doesn’t give that it’s very inviting.
There has to be a reason why she felt the need to leave while pregnant with you…
that clearly is the move of a mother wanting to protect her child from whatever hurt her. ”
I looked at him and studied the exhaustion beneath his composure, the worry he tried disguising as logic, and the concern for my feelings he showed through his love.
From being there with me the moment I found out about her death to the way he’d spent the last three days helping me pack while simultaneously pretending like he wasn’t afraid to let me go knowing that I was about to embark on a journey that I wanted to take alone was getting the best of him.
I’m sure this was his way of trying to talk me out of going even though he knew the choice was ultimately mine and just like my mom, I was one stubborn person to allow someone else’s opinion to cloud my judgement.
“Well, there’s only one way to find out…and that’s by going to see things for myself.”
“You know you don’t have to do this alone.”
His words wrapped around something very fragile inside of me and for one dangerous second, I almost let them stop me.
But then I remembered the envelope, the photographs and the burned edges of the letter that was inside of it with my mother’s unfinished note to me; If anything happens to me, don’t trust— Then absolutely nothing after that except for smoke damage and missing words.
That sentence carried the weight of something terrible that she was trying to hide from me and knowing that she knew I’d never see the letter until she was no longer present left something unsettling within me.
“But I need too,” I said lowly. “I have to do this alone. I’ve always wanted to know where my roots came from, I just always respected my mom’s wishes. But now that she’s gone, this is my way of dealing with losing her.”
“I can’t do nothing but respect it.”
“My hope is that being where she is from would help me feel closer to her. I miss her so much.”
Julian stared at me for a few minutes like he was trying to memorize something before it disappeared. Then finally he let out a long breath and exhaled through his nose and nodded in agreeance which came across more like he was surrendering.
“Then promise me this one thing.”
“What’s that?”
“If this starts feeling wrong…or you start to feel unsafe,” his jaw tightened slightly, “you leave immediately. Better yet, you call me right away then leave immediately.”
“Okay.” Was all I said.
I should’ve said more, said that I promised him that I’d call him and leave immediately, but instead, my eyes drifted toward the window and the rain outside.
To the left of me was Lake Michigan and along it ran Lake Shore Drive.
It was a welcoming sight, almost like being suspended between the hustle and bustle of the city and the calming serenity of the lake.
Turning toward the south of the city in the direction that I’d soon be traveling to Georgia, something deep in my chest rattled.
My hope was that soon, I’d be able to get all the questions I had answered.
And that alone was enough for me to feel confident in my decision to part ways with the love of my life temporarily and prepare to head to the small, back of the woods, marsh-like town called Magnolia Graves.
The long ride from Atlanta Hartsfield-Jackson Airport to Magnolia Graves was a long three hours that seemed more like double of that time.
The weather was a beautiful sunny, 89 degrees in Georgia but the closer I got to my destination the weather began to turn gloomy, and it had started to rain.
One of the first things I noticed about Magnolia Graves was the smell.
It smelled like wet earth and Magnolia blossoms with a mix of something older underneath the both of them.
Something that smelled like fresh dirt after funerals.
Following the instructions on the GPS, I knew according to the display on the dash of the black Infiniti QX60 sport SUV I rented from Avis along with the rusted welcome sign that appeared through the storm that I had arrived and that made my stomach tightened hard enough to hurt.
Welcome to Magnolia Graves.