Chapter 20 #2
She continues to cry until finally gasping for breath. Moments pass, and we wait together for her to speak. They last longer than the drawn out moments as I dug my parent’s graves.
Finally, when she’s exhausted herself from her sorrow, she stops and looks at Kassiel. It doesn’t take long for her to speak his given name.
The dull eyes shutter and blink, before a small smile of defeat graces her lips.
“Devourer.” The woman doesn’t say it harshly, not like I have, but rather reverently.
His throat bobs as he inches closer. “Who did this to your boy?” he asks softly, placing one hand on hers and one on the boy’s still form.
“You know who. The one who hunts us all, even you.” She gestures to his neck where the inky band resides. I watch the interaction and wonder if the people of The Siltar Woods know more about this man before me than I do.
“When were they here? I assume it was Orlin, The Nightmare as you’ll know him, and the royal helianate? The huntsman of the king?” he asks, pressing for as much information as the grieving mother can give.
Her head drops to gaze upon her son. She gently pulls the boy’s shirt closed and straightens his clothes before sweeping her delicate fingers over the russet locks of his hair.
“Probably two days now, and yes. The Nightmare shredded the mind of Yacobee, our leader.”
Her eyes glisten with tears and one revolts, slipping down leaving a white streak along her muddied face. “The huntsman rounded up some of the young ones with magic and bashed in the heads of the parents who fought to free them.”
She begins sobbing again and the sick feeling in my stomach returns. I haven’t witnessed this level of wickedness from King Euron in the other villages he ransacked. This feels different.
The question slips from my lips before I can stop,“Why did they come?”
Her face jerks to mine as she realizes I’m standing off to the side. From here, I can make out her sunken face and red rimmed eyes. She doesn’t answer right away and turns to the man who still kneels beside her.
“The Nightmare, he…he screamed and rampaged about finding the lost traitor.” Her words end in a cry. “He said that we’d be hiding him and demanded to know where he was.”
Kassiel sinks back onto his heels.
“When no one came forward, they began striping the women…”
Oh gods.
She continues, her voice detached, “Eventually they began branding us with pokers and the one you called Orlin…well he became enraged.”
Her sleeve makes its way to her nose and wipes the tears that have gathered there.
I crane my neck to hear her words which have become hushed and broken.
“He threw Yacobee down in front of all of us and tormented him with his demented visions. Yacobee laid there screaming and wailing for the goddess, and so Orlin grabbed a piked spear and…gods…he shoved it down his throat until it burst from his back.”
Bile rises in my throat and I cover my mouth. The image is barbaric, a viciousness I haven’t ever seen.
“That wasn’t even the worst part,” she closes her eyes and I watch her skin turn to a sickly pallor, “they undressed his body…goddess help him through the veil…”
She grabs her son’s body and brings him to her chest and covers his ears, as if she could protect him from the next words that croak from her lips.
“They defiled his body. I can’t bring myself to say what atrocities, but they assaulted his dignity, even in death, and then left him to feed the wild hogs. ”
I have to close my eyes. I don’t need to guess what they did. Orlin and Velroy threatened to do the same to my corpse.
Kassiel shifts, the mud squelching with his movement and my lids peel open. He’s stoic, his face stone and unnaturally hardened.
“I’ve been looking for my son since I sent him into hiding yesterday. When I saw my house burned, I assumed the worst. But I couldn’t find him in the ashes and held onto hope that he’d run to the woods to join the spirits. You know they won’t harm us.”
All The Devourer does is nod.
The woman makes a motion over her chest, moving her fist from the base of her chin, straight down to her abdomen, and in a half circle covering her heart. Kassiel copies her movement.
The gesture is unfamiliar to me, adding to the growing suspicion of this man before me.
The forlorn look in her eyes focuses on Kassiel’s inky band again, her tears drying on her face.
“What will you do?” I hear him whisper to her, his hands still on hers and the deceased boy.
“I can’t endure this.” The pain in her voice lacerates the air. This is devastation I will never understand. Losing Hanin was hard enough and I’ve barely survived it myself. The anguish she feels must be so much more powerful. My hurt pales in comparison.
He tilts his head and widens his eyes. “You will continue on, live for him, fight back.”
It almost sounds like Kassiel is counciling her, eager for her to move on from this heartbreak.
“There is nothing without him. I’m a widow, now childless. There is no happiness for me in this lifetime.”
Kassiel shakes his head. She squeezes his hand and her face dons an unreadable expression, hard and serious.
“You must do it.” She looks into his eyes. They’re solemn laced with an unspoken plea.
My breath catches in my throat.
The Mors Finalem…
He releases her touch and pulls his hands back into his lap.
“You cannot ask that of me.” His voice is so low I’m not sure I’m hearing it correctly.
“Please, you know how rare it is to find those we love again once they’ve gone through the veil,” she begins to sob again, her frame shuddering with each cry, “he won’t return to this place, I know it. I want to join him in those plains.”
Kassiel’s demeanor changes, any hope or strong facade fading.
“I do know.” His lips pull up in a small smile, but the sadness is etched into his eyes, an almost heart shattering green.
They stare into each other’s eyes for a while before he asks, “Are you ready?”
“You’re a good man, Devourer. Don’t lose the hope for your redemption.”
Kassiel jerks his head as if slapped.
He kneels closer to her and cradles her body as she holds her son. His green orbs close behind his thick lashed lids and he breathes heavily in deep concentration.
The air around us hums with the sudden shift in energy, causing my own magic to thrum beneath my skin.
I watch as he releases the boy, ever so reverently, and moves his hand over to the woman’s chest. Her body still wracks with cries as tears stream along her face.
I don’t belong in this moment, and gods, I don’t want to be here witnessing this.
A glowing ball pulls from her chest, as if unweaving from the threads of her body.
It’s breathtaking, a shimmery silver almost the same color as my magic.
The little ropes that bind the pulsing orb strain, and they slowly rip apart, leaving frayed ends of light.
The illuminated lines along the orb flicker like a candle in a hurricane as the tethers of the woman’s chest fizzle out.
Silent tears begin to stream down my face, but I dare not blink so as to not miss this moment, no matter how much I want to.
Kassiel gently pulls the orb with his hand and holds it up as the woman’s body goes limp and slides out of his grasp.
He caresses the orb, as if it’s a babe. It’s unsettling.
This man who is known for such inhumanity, such evil, holds the essence as if it’s the most precious possession.
He’s careful with it, steady in his movements and delicate.
I’m left speechless by the image of this man of shadows, of death, carrying something so pure and light, and meets it with such tenderness.
Her body lies alongside the boys and I realize we never got their names.
It seems like such a simple thought before I’m caught off guard by The Devourer cradling the orb to his own chest. He inhales deeply and his body illuminates in a flash as the brilliant ball of light is absorbed.
It’s like watching a star go out in the sky.
I’m speechless, I don’t know what I expected but it wasn’t this.
He looks down, his face fallen and eyes broken, like he’s just been forced to do something very wrong. It’s strange, the way my heart crushes a little at the sight.
He doesn’t enjoy using his magic.
I didn’t anticipate anyone would find satisfaction from murder, but I also didn’t anticipate that he would feel ashamed using his magic.
We stay like this for gods know how long. So long that other villagers remove the bodies and take them to be buried. Him there on his knees, looking like the world is too heavy. I feel like an intruder as The Devourer continues to look so broken.
The scene replays in my mind, him delicately pulling her soul from her. How full of admiration he treated the task even though he appeared to break in that moment, in the only way that us monsters know how to—silently.
The sky begins to form clouds and the sun lengthens, eating away at the horizon. I feel helpless, unsure how to move this mammoth of a man, feeling like I’ve witnessed something far too intimate.
“Kassiel?” His name slips from my lips in a whisper, and I wait for him to lift his head.
He does no such thing.
His disheveled black hair hangs low in his face, his shoulders sinking even lower. He looks devastating, magnificently so, as if he’s fallen from the gods’ graces and been forsaken.
I step toward him, my legs numb from standing for so long and the cold chill that lingers.
“Kassiel?” I whisper again.
As I crouch to get level with him, it’s then that I notice his tears. They’re few, but definitely there. My eyes linger on the one sliding down his cheek and I clench my hand into a fist, unsure if I should dare touch him.
The sight moves me to tears too. Even monsters can be felled.
Without another thought, I fall into the mud with him. I touch him, his body far too cold to withstand anymore of this harsh winter condition.
“We must move Kassiel, or you’ll catch your death.”
Slowly unbuttoning the brass buttons of my cloak, I throw it off and wrap it around the broken warrior and rub his back hoping to warm him.
Softly, I say, “I’ll wait until you’re ready, but you don’t need to face this alone.”
And so we wait.