Chapter 48
Haiyden
I watch her take another slow step back—the kind that says don’t follow .
And I know.
“You should hate me,” I say, voice rough with regret.
But it’s done. And I can’t take it back.
She stares at me frozen—confused and terrified. The glow drains from her face, leaving her pale in the bedroom light.
“What are you talking about, Haiyden?” she asks slowly, each word landing like it’s been chosen carefully.
Like she already knows what comes next is going to break her.
I force the word out.
“Jules.”
She flinches like I hit her.
Her whole body goes rigid. Spine straight. Fingers twitching at her sides like she’s searching for something to hold on to—but there’s nothing.
“I know what happened.”
I watch the shift happen in real time.
Her world cracks right down the middle, and I can’t catch the pieces fast enough.
Anger.
Disbelief.
Devastation.
Her face contorts with every flicker of emotion, but she doesn’t speak. Just stands there, breathing fast, like her lungs can’t catch up.
She tries to hold it in, to keep it together—but her hand moves, fingers pressing into her thigh like if she pinches hard enough, she’ll wake up from a nightmare.
And when she realizes she’s awake, that she knows it’s real—
“No. No, no, no.”
She shakes her head, frantic. Her eyes go wide, lit with something that looks a hell of a lot like fear.
“You…” Her eyes dart, like her brain is trying to fill in the blanks. “It was… you?”
The words come out like a gasp. Like she doesn’t even know what she’s asking.
“God, no, Calla.” My voice breaks. “I could never do that.”
She takes another step back, like the air between us might burn her. Her arms wrap around her body, hands gripping her elbows like she’s holding herself together by force.
“But you could lie to me?”
Her voice is barely a whisper.
“You… you knew. This whole time?”
I open my mouth.
Nothing comes out .
“Say something!” she screams, voice cracking.
Tears stream down her cheeks, but she doesn’t move. Doesn’t even wipe them away.
I swallow hard.
The truth rises like bile—
But it’s all I have left to give.
“It was supposed to be my secret to keep.”
The second I say it, I see something inside her break.
Her face twists—fury and heartbreak colliding—and suddenly, she’s burning. Rage simmers beneath her skin, ready to ignite.
“This whole time,” she breathes, voice shaking.
Her chest rises and falls too fast, fingers digging into her arms like she’s bracing for impact.
“This whole fucking time, Haiyden. You listened to me talk about her. You held me while I cried over her. And you just—what?”
Her voice fractures on the last word, shattering in the space between us.
I watch her hands fall to her sides, twitching like she doesn’t know whether to hit me or just run.
Tears stream down her face, and she barely seems to feel them.
But I do.
It wrecks me.
“You told me you loved me…”
She shakes her head, stunned. Disgusted. Like she doesn’t even recognize the person standing in front of her.
“How could you even do that to someone?”
She moves like a rubber band snapping—sudden, frantic.
She paces the room, grabbing her clothes with shaking hands, yanking them on like she needs to cover every inch of herself.
Like if she shuts me out physically, maybe it’ll be easier to shut me out completely.
I stand, chest caving in.
There’s an emptiness in me now, widening by the second.
I reach for her—instinct, nothing more—just needing to do something .
But the second she sees it, she recoils. Her face twists with disgust.
“Do not even think about putting your hands on me right now.”
She backs away slowly, like I might snap. Like I’m some wild thing she never should’ve trusted. Like I’m dangerous.
And maybe I am.
She grabs her things with sharp, jerky movements—like if she stops for even a second, she’ll fall apart.
She won’t let herself feel exposed. Not anymore.
Not to me.
“You don’t get to call that love,” she spits through gritted teeth. “And I can’t believe I ever fell for it.”
The room tilts.
I feel like a monster. I am one.
She turns to leave. And I let her.
But just as she reaches the doorway, she hesitates. And when she turns back, the pain in her eyes nearly kills me.
It’s not just anger. It’s betrayal.
Loss.
Like I reached inside her and tore out every good memory we ever made.
“This is your only chance, Haiyden.” Her voice is steady, but it wavers. Just slightly. “Explain everything. Right now. Or you will never see me again.”
And I know this is goodbye.
Because I can’t.
I just…
Can’t.
“Calla, please.” My voice is nothing but a rasp, barely audible over the blood pounding in my ears. “You have to trust me—”
Before I can finish, the door slams shut.
The sound ricochets through the room, echoing in my chest, shaking something loose inside me.
I stand there, frozen, ears ringing.
Then, in the distance, the front door slams too.
My thoughts race, trying to make sense of what I’ve done—
Everything I kept buried.
Everything I just broke.
I stagger back, then drop to my knees. My fists twist in my hair. My breath comes in shallow bursts. My heart pounds. My chest aches.
And I can’t get enough air.
She’s really gone. And this time, it’s probably for good.