34. Ash
Ash
My heart is broken and finally put back together simultaneously.
She’s in my hands. I can feel her under my palms, soft and sweet in my grip.
I can hear her, her soft, pained breaths and her whines of pain.
I can smell her, her vanilla and honey scent barely hanging on, covered by the smell of blood and rust. My nose skims along her skin as I inhale her scent, trying to make this feel real.
But I can also see her.
And what I see makes me feel a very fucking bad feeling. Like I want to murder every single person who has laid eyes on her.
Blood soaks her from head to toe. Her usually bright blonde hair shines red, along with her soaked-through clothing. Her eyes shine with a slightly unhinged look; so much adrenaline and pain sparkle in those deep eyes. Deep purple bruises mar her under-eyes.
In her hand, she still clutches a knife, refusing to let it go. Her other hand grips me like I’m a figment of her imagination that might just slip through her fingers.
The feeling is mutual.
I set her on the ground behind a rusted, blue shipping container, ducking around the side to shoot off a few bullets at the men who are too close to my angel.
It’s a blood bath. Blood pools on the concrete, bodies falling left right, and centre. My Devils hold their own, defending us in a way that I trust them to.
Screams of agony find me, and it brings a smile to my face. They deserve every bit of pain they get, and more. Turning, I head back to my angel, crouching before her. She’s weak, her body limp against the container as her eyes follow my every movement.
The way she looks at me... It’s everything. Her eyes wide in wonder, a small smile on her pouty lips, despite all she’s been through.
“Angel,” I breathe, my hands finding her face again. I can’t ever get enough of touching her and feeling her warmth. Her pulse stutters under my palm, her life force still pumping through her veins. “Where hurts?”
Her shaking hand points in the direction of her thigh, where I know Zeke stabbed her. I have to grit my teeth and fist my hands to stop myself from marching back out there and shooting the already dead man again, just for good measure.
The wound is wrapped in black clothing, but there is so much blood. Too much.
“It’s not all mine,” she whispers, as if she could read my mind.
My eyes flick up to hers, searching for what she means. Not all hers? Her lips twist into a satisfied curl, those eyes darkening in the sexiest of ways.
“What? You think you’re the only one around here with the killing instincts, Devil?” The way she purrs the words has my cock straining against my pants.
A growl slips out of me, and my body hums with need.
“We’ll unpack that later, Angel.” My voice is low, threat laced in promise. “But for now, I’m gonna go unleash my killing instincts.”
Leaning down, I kiss her with all the heat I’m feeling. But her hand comes up to grip my shirt, not letting me go. Sadness etches her features, and I freeze, bringing my face back close to hers.
“Ash...” her voice is clogged with emotion.
“I’m so, so sorry.” I go to speak. To tell her she has nothing to be sorry for and that I’m the one who should be sorry.
I’m the one who let her get taken and hurt, but she shakes her head.
“You are the best person I know. The only person who lets me be me and loves me for it, anyway... I love you, Ash. I love your fierceness and protectiveness. I love how you wholeheartedly live by your own rules.”
My heart is thrumming in my chest, and I have to swallow a lump that’s formed in my throat. Noone has ever loved me, not just despite my flaws, but because of them. And somehow this perfect, breathtaking angel does.
She loves me.
Her eyes flick between mine, intensity burning in them as if she’s trying to convey how much she means what she is telling me.
“I just needed to tell you... in case...”
I stop her with a growl, my face less than an inch from hers. “Don’t you fucking finish that sentence, Angel. We will both be walking out of here tonight.”
I stand, my body looming over hers, my eyes raking up and down her, memorizing the injuries that mark her perfect skin. It’s what I’ll see as I’m tearing the flesh from these assholes.
I almost don’t reply, unable to find the words that could describe how she makes me feel. How her loving me makes me feel. My lips move anyway.
“You are my heart, Angel,” I bite the words out. “You have been the second I saw you. I would torch every city, every human, every God that tried to take you from me. I don’t want redemption, Angel. I want you. And if that condemns me, then I’ll carve us a throne in hell and make it ours.”
I turn, running into the wild chaos, my fists immediately finding flesh, my gun finding its mark. Every hit, every shot, is payback for what has been done to my girl. It’s a beautiful thing, flaying the flesh of my enemies. Hearing them scream in pain.
My ruthless nerves calm as each one falls, the monster in my chest soothing with each scream. And she loves me anyway. She doesn’t see me as a monster. The shackles of that word loosen, and a fire is lit inside my chest.
A Wraith lunges for me, and my knife sinks into his chest; the angry twist of his face falls into shock. He collapses to the ground as I slide the knife out and jam it into his eye socket. It’s gruesome and vile and fucking disgusting.
And I fucking love it.
It doesn’t take long; the Devil’s showing the city what we are capable of. Before I know it, lifeless bodies of Wraiths lie in defeat, while most of my Devil’s will be returning home tonight. Most.
The ringing in my ears slowly fades, replaced by the slap of the waves against the dock and the distant creak of metal shifting in the wind. The scent of gunpowder and blood wafts in the salty air. Darkness is taking over, and the night feels heavier now. Quieter.
I turn immediately, scanning for her. She’s still propped against the container where I left her, blood drenched, knife still clutched in her fist like it’s part of her now. Her eyes are already on me.
My chest expands for what feels like the first full breath in hours. But then my gaze shifts, and lands on Kai.
He’s standing a few feet away; shoulders squared like he’s still ready to fight. His eyes flicker around the area, always on alert. His knuckles are split and blood drips from a cut above his eye.
And his wrists... My vision tunnels.
Dark purple bands circle both of them, angry flesh swelling. The skin is broken in places from where he was shackled up. He broke his wrists to save her.
Something primal rips through me. I cross the space between us without thinking.
Gripping his shoulders, I drop my forehead against his.
No words. There aren’t any that could convey how thankful I am and proud I am.
He wouldn’t take them, anyway. Our ragged breaths mingle, and my eyes flutter closed, gripping him tight.
Pulling away, our eyes lock, his dark voids blinking up at me. He nods once before pulling away and striding over to Kaleb, whose face is curled into a snarl. Murder is etched into his features as he takes in his brother’s state. I know how he fucking feels.
Inhaling, I steady my racing breaths and turn again to go to my girl. I need to hold her and get her fixed. Need to get rid of all her pain and ensure she doesn’t feel it ever again.
That’s when I hear Griff.
“Stop moving, you fucking prick,” Griff snarls, boots scraping against the concrete.
In his enormous fist is the scruff of Howard Dally.
The asshole I completely forgot about. Seeing his face almost makes me laugh.
Pale and sunken, and so very fucking pissed off.
The truck he was in is pretty much destroyed, bullet holes marring the once shiny exterior. It’s a wonder he survived at all.
He struggles futilely against Griff’s hold, his arms still secured behind his back. Blood soaks his clothes.
“Found something in the truck,” Griff calls, voice cold.
“Get off me,” Howard grunts, twisting and turning as Griff shoves him to his knees on the rough ground. He lands with a thud.
My head whips to the side, nervousness coursing through me at her reaction.
Her eyes are wide, stuck on the man who she calls her father.
She tries to stand, and before I can get to her, Kai is by her side, lifting her to her trembling feet.
He helps her walk closer. That devoid look falls onto her face, and my heart drops.
She chose him once before.
And I wouldn’t blame her if she chose him again.
It goes against everything in our nature to turn on the people who brought us into this world. I would fucking know. I killed mine.
And I left her... I let her get taken and tortured. I watch, frozen to the spot, just metres away, as she looks the man up and down slowly. His face is nothing but pure hatred as he glares up at her, and it takes everything in me not to shoot the look clean off his face.
“You stupid fucking girl,” he spits.
Everyone has paused, watching them, ready to strike. Everything sounds louder now. Unease coils tight inside me. I don’t know if I’m about to watch her walk away from me. Because she could. She could ask me to take her and her father to the hospital right this second and I fucking would.
She doesn’t reply to him, just watches him. My eyes are glued to her face, just watching.
“Look at you,” he sneers. “I gave you everything, and this is what you choose.”
“Angel,” I start, my voice rough. “You don’t have to...”
She shakes her head without looking at me, her eyes stuck on her father.
He laughs, the sound ugly and cracked. “You think that man loves you? You think you matter to them?” He gestures to us, crowded around them. “You’re nothing. You always were nothing.”
The dock feels like it’s tilting. I step forward, ready to end him myself. But Maddy lifts her hand slightly, and I freeze.
Her voice, when she speaks, is quiet.
“You had the chance to save me, and you didn’t. You chose your money over me.”
He rolls his eyes. “I gave you everything, you ungrateful bitch.”
Silence follows.
Griff shifts behind him, his grip tightening. Even he looks sick with the words the man is spewing.
“You sold me,” she whispers, but it comes out so very loudly.
With Kai propping her up, she looks down at him. Not with love. Not with hate. With pity.
“You are a sad, sad man, Dad,” she says softly. “I hope you enjoy your life with all your money and all your power.”
She turns, her eyes finding mine, and her entire face shifts. She looks at me like she does in fact love me. She smiles.
And I smile back.
I step forward, ready to hold her, and run away from this mess. But his voice sounds again.
“You always were such an ungrateful little whore.”
Everything stops. It seems as if even the ocean pauses, the wind silences, and my heart freezes.
She pauses mid-step.
Slowly, she turns back. Her knuckles white around the grip she has on the stained knife.
Howard Dally grins a vile grin, thinking he’s won by her reaction.
“Running back to your gang of psychos? Spread your legs for them too?”
I move... but I’m too late. She crosses the distance with one limping stride, carrying her own weight.
And with a snarl I’ve never heard from her before, she draws the blade across his throat. Clean, precise and fucking brutal.
A red line opens beneath his jaw. For a split second, no one moves.
Then blood pours.
He gurgles, hands straining uselessly behind him, eyes wide with shock as he topples forward onto the concrete. Dead before he even hits the ground.
My dark angel stands over him, chest rising and falling rapidly. Finally, the knife drops to the ground before she turns back to me. Devils cheer; the sound makes me smile. She is one of them, and they all know it.
I meet her halfway.
Her blood-streaked face tilts up to mine.
“I’m done choosing people who don’t choose me,” she breathes.
My throat tightens painfully. And then she kisses me. Hard. A desperate, possessive kiss. Her mouth tastes like salt and iron and something wild. Hands fist in my shirt as I grip her waist, anchoring her against me as the night air shifts around us.
“Let’s go home, Angel,” I murmur against her lips. “I have a doctor at the club waiting for us.”
She whimpers, kissing me repeatedly, and I chuckle a breathy laugh against her lips. Carefully, like she’s made of glass, I slide my hands beneath her thighs and lift her.
She gasps softly, her legs wrapping around my waist, locking there despite the pain I know must be screaming through her body. Her arms circle my neck, fingers tangling in my hair like she’s staking her claim.
Like she’s not letting go again.
“Careful,” Kai mutters from behind us
I shoot him a look that says I’d burn the world before I’d drop her.
Maddison presses her forehead to mine, breathing me in. Her weight settles against me, warm and real and alive. Mine.
The dock is quiet now, littered with bodies and memories I want to push out of my mind.
I turn towards to exit, ready to carry her to one of these cars, away from this blood-soaked chapter. Ready to put oceans between her and tonight.
That’s when Matt steps into my path. His expression stops me cold. Concern lines his face as he glances at my angel first.
“You good?” He asks her softly.
She nods once against my shoulder, though her grip tightens.
Matt’s eyes shift to me.
“There’s a problem.”
Every muscle in my body goes rigid.
“What.”
He exhales slowly, jaw tight. “Zeke.”
The name alone is enough to make my vision sharpen.
“He’s not here.”
A cold weight drops into my gut.
“What do you mean he’s not here?” My voice is low and dangerous.
“There’s no body,” Matt holds my stare. “He’s gone.”
Behind me, one of the Devils curses under his breath. My mind whirls with thoughts, one being that Zeke is out there still.
But my angel is in my arms, and for tonight, that has to be enough. For tonight, we will rest. We will heal. And tomorrow, we will fucking hunt him down.