CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Emma tried to calm herself as she and Audsley made their way toward the entrance of Lord and Lady Embry’s home. She was surprised when Audsley consented to attend this ball, but he’d said he depended on Lord Embry’s vote in the House of Lords and it was best if they made an appearance.
As Emma and Audsley entered the house, Emma could feel the curious gazes of those around them. The dowager’s at-home had been a relatively small event but, judging from the crush of people as they tried to make their way to the Embrys’ ballroom, there were hundreds of guests in attendance. And it seemed just about everyone wished to see the new Countess of Audsley.
The house sparkled with hundreds of candles. A crystal chandelier illuminated the foyer, casting reflected light on the walls. An orchestra played a waltz in the distance while liveried footmen passed flutes of champagne to the guests. The line to enter the ballroom moved so slowly that some of the surrounding guests finished two or more glasses by the time they reached the receiving line.
Very few people spoke to Audsley directly, though many stared at Emma, then whispered comments to each other behind their fans. Audsley squeezed her hand. “You are beautiful.”
Emma wondered if he knew how a simple compliment from him could warm her heart so thoroughly. “Thank you. You are magnificent, as always.” That was true. She rarely had cause to see him in formal evening wear, but it suited him extraordinarily well. His legs were meant for stockings. The very thought had her smiling.
They were finally announced and for a moment it seemed all activity in the ballroom ceased, as the guests who hadn’t already stared at them finally got their chance. Emma wasn’t certain if this was the usual reaction to newlyweds, but before she could think too much about it, her husband slipped his arm around her waist and escorted her down the short flight of stairs.
“You are making quite an impression,” he said.
“It is easier with you beside me.”
“Then we’ll have to make sure I am always beside you.”
She looked at him, almost missing a step in the process. There were times like these when she was certain he felt something for her other than friendship and obligation. Then why couldn’t he say it?
The receiving line was still in place and Emma looked forward to seeing Lady Embry and finally meeting her husband. Lord Embry was a handsome man who looked to be in his late-forties. He had an athletic build with greying fair hair and looked to spend a great deal of time outdoors. “It is a pleasure to meet you, Lady Audsley. My wife has very much enjoyed making your acquaintance,” he said, as he bowed over Emma’s hand.
“Thank you, my lord. She has been most gracious in helping me acclimate to London.”
“I hope to see more of you,” he said, as he squeezed her hand.
“Embry,” said Audsley, as he gently nudged Emma further up the line. “Thank you for tonight’s invitation.”
“Anytime, Audsley,” said Lord Embry, with a smile in Emma’s direction. “Anytime.”
“Emma!” said Lady Embry, as Emma stood before her. “I am so glad to see you. Your gown shows you off to perfection.”
“You are most kind. Both you and your home are lovely.” Tonight, Lady Embry wore an ice blue gown which matched her eyes. Before Emma could say more, she was once again gently nudged up the line.
Now Audsley was standing in front of Lady Embry. “How wonderful to see you again,” she said. “I’ve so enjoyed getting to know your wife.”
“Lady Embry,” he said bowing, before turning and guiding Emma through the rest of the line.
“You were a bit abrupt with Lady Embry,” said Emma.
“Was I?” he asked.
“A bit. Why will you not tell me your reasons for disliking her?” she asked, making sure to keep her voice low so no one would overhear.
“Let’s get a glass of champagne,” said Audsley, nodding to an acquaintance, all the while taking Emma further into the crowd and away from Lady Embry.
The ballroom was illuminated by three chandeliers, as well as dozens of sconces. The soft light flickered around them, contrasting with the moonlight which shone into the room through the four sets of French doors at the end of the ballroom. Music floated down to them from where the orchestra was seated in the balcony above. “May I have this dance?” Audsley asked.
“It would be my pleasure,” said Emma, as he swept her into the dance.
A lovely shiver went up Emma’s back as they glided across the floor and she relaxed into his arms. They’d waltzed before when his cousin Lady Endicott had been helping Grace prepare for an evening with Carter. But nothing about that waltz had been relaxing. Just being in Audsley’s arms had ignited a tension throughout her body. Every part of her had been on edge, craving his touch, wishing they could be closer. She still craved his touch and wished they could be closer, but at least now she knew they would end the evening in his bed – their bed. A second shiver went up her back.
He frowned. “Are you cold? You’ve exposed quite a bit of yourself tonight and I believe you’d feel much better if you took my jacket.”
Emma smiled. “I believe if I did that I’d be wasting this gown you spent too much money on. I am not any more exposed than the other ladies here tonight.”
“But none of them is my wife,” he said with the hint of a smile.
Emma wanted to kiss him for that comment. She liked it when he exposed the tiniest sliver of jealousy. It made her feel more certain of his feelings.
When the dance ended, he escorted them off the floor, where he left her while he went in search of refreshments. She was admiring his fine form from the back when she heard Lady Embry addressing her.
“It is good to see Audsley enjoying himself at a ball. He usually looks like he’d rather be anywhere else than where he is. I believe you’re to thank for that.”
Emma smiled at the compliment. “The music is so lovely that anyone would be hard pressed to not enjoy it.”
“That is kind of you to say, but I shall amicably disagree with you and say I had the right of it all along. And here he is now,” she said, as Audsley joined them, holding two glasses of punch.
He gave one to Emma, then held out the other to their hostess. “My lady?” he said in a polite but formal tone.
Lady Embry smiled and touched her fan to his arm. “Thank you, but I have had my fill of that punch. I’ve been tasting its various iterations all week to get it just right for tonight. I was just telling your lovely wife that it’s good to see you enjoying yourself for a change.”
“I enjoy myself often enough.” He once again used a tone which was polite but distant.
Lady Embry tapped him with her fan once again. “I believe we can thank your wife for that. I hear you are getting a reputation as one who smiles often.”
Emma thought that was interesting. She’d noticed it herself but wasn’t sure if that was how he was when he wasn’t with her. Perhaps this marriage did make him happy.
However, he didn’t seem to be so at the moment, as he bowed to Lady Embry. “It is a beautiful ball and I do not wish to keep you from your guests.”
“I shall take that as my cue to leave,” Lady Embry said with a musical laugh, before turning to Emma. “Do enjoy the party, my dear. We shall talk later.”
As Lady Embry glided away to greet another guest, Emma turned to her husband. “Audsley, that was poorly done of you. I know you do not care for her, but you shouldn’t give offense to our hostess.”
“I did nothing of the sort. I simply allowed her to move on to her next guest. Oh, look. Mama is on her way to see us.”
Emma looked up to see that Amelia was, indeed, on the way, looking remarkably well for someone who’d so recently been unwell.
“Audsley,” she said, when she reached them. “I’m glad to see the two of you are finally doing as you should socially. I hope people have not been too rude to you.”
“Mama, I can think of no reason why people should be rude to us and I certainly would not countenance it if anyone acted that way toward my wife. And I do mean anyone.”
Amelia must have taken the hint, for her eyes narrowed just the slightest. “Kempton was looking for you, something about legislation. He asked me to direct you to him as soon as I saw you. He is in the card room.”
Audsley sighed, turning to Emma. “I hate to leave you, but his support is crucial.”
“I am perfectly able to stay in a ballroom by myself.”
“And I will be here with her,” said Amelia.
Audsley hesitated, as if that was what he feared. But then he kissed Emma’s hand, bowed shallowly to his mother and departed for the card room.
Emma and Amelia stood in silence for a few moments. Since Emma was enjoying the music, she decided to let Amelia come up with something to say.
“You and Lady Embry seem to be getting along well. How do you find her?”
“She has been most kind to me.”
“She has long been a dear friend of our family, despite what happened.”
Emma knew she shouldn’t rise to the bait, but since her husband hadn’t been forthcoming on the subject, she found herself asking, “What happened?”
“She and Audsley, of course. Everyone assumed they would marry, not the least of which he did. They were close to becoming betrothed until Embry came in and swept her off her feet. You can’t blame her – after all, he was quite dashing and worldly. Audsley must have seemed provincial in comparison. He took it quite badly, even begged her to reconsider. I was most distressed to hear that since the men in our family shouldn’t have to beg for anything. But it was just another sign of how upset he was to have lost her. But you need not fear. I’m certain time has helped to heal most of the pain. Oh, look, it’s my dear friend Lady Geary. I must go say hello. Do enjoy yourself in my absence, won’t you, dear?”
As Amelia left to join her friend, Emma suddenly felt ill. Audsley had been in love with Lady Embry and he was only mostly healed. No wonder he’d never told Emma he loved her. He still loved someone else.
“I never thought I’d see you at a ton ball,” said a haughty voice from behind her. Emma turned to find Cressida Phillips, an old schoolmate. She’d been a particularly unpleasant girl who’d delighted in torturing others and had been particularly nasty to Emma’s dear friend Daphne Peyton. First, Cressida’s mother, Lady Carleton had been instrumental in getting Daphne discharged from her much-needed teaching position, then she’d spread gossip about her within the ton. Despite that, Daphne was now happily married to Jeremy Beckett. But Emma was slow to forgive those who hurt her loved ones.
“I am betrothed to a marquess,” said Cressida, who had always believed that marrying well was one of the highest honors a lady could achieve. “That’s higher than a mere earl and means I shall take precedence over you.”
“How nice for you,” said Emma in clipped tones. Wasn’t it enough that she had to worry about Lady Embry? Now she had to tolerate Cressida, as well? She couldn’t care less about precedence, but she dearly wished she could stomp on Cressida’s slippers after all the difficulties she’d caused Daphne. But they were in a ballroom with too many witnesses.
“I see that Daphne hasn’t dared to show her face in town. I wonder how her husband likes having to keep her hidden in the country.”
Emma took a deep breath and tried to rein in her temper. “My husband and I value Daphne’s friendship very much and if you know what’s good for you, you won’t speak ill of her again. As for Jeremy hiding her in the country, all I can say is he is so besotted with his wife that he hasn’t had time for anything but her. I don’t see that abating anytime soon.”
“Yet, I see Audsley thought nothing of bringing you to town. Apparently, your husband isn’t as besotted with you as you claim Daphne’s is with her. And if you ask me, it is rather vulgar to speak of feelings. It is much better for two people to wed because of family and heritage. And I shall be a marchioness.”
“So, you have mentioned. Now, if you’ll excuse me.”
“They would have made a lovely couple, do you not agree?” asked Cressida, pointing to where Audsley was speaking to Lady Embry.
Emma was surprised to see the two of them conversing, especially since this meant he most assuredly wasn’t in the card room, which was where he’d said he was going. “Lady Embry is a gracious hostess,” said Emma, wondering how she was able to make her voice sound so steady when she was barely able to keep from crying. “I hope Audsley is thanking her for a lovely evening.” She truly hoped that was all the conversation entailed, though if that were true, it was the longest thank you she’d seen in a while.
“They used to see quite a bit of each other. You probably didn’t know that because you were forced to live in that hut with all the other spinsters. But everyone assumed they had an understanding until Embry entered the picture. But now that she has delivered him two boys, it is well-known that they are both free to seek entanglements elsewhere. From the looks of it, I’d say she has already selected her first.”
Emma was afraid this was the first time Cressida had ever been right about anything. “It is ill-mannered to gossip about the lady whose hospitality we are enjoying.”
“You really are na?ve, aren’t you? Why else would anyone go to a ball other than to gossip about others?”
“If that is what ton entertainments are all about, I daresay I was better off at Jasmine Cottage. Now, I really must be going.”
But Cressida just couldn’t let her walk away. “You know, Beckett didn’t need to marry Daphne. He could have just set her up in a house somewhere, like other men had done for her mother before her.”
And that was quite enough of that. Without further thought, Emma threw her drink on Cressida. As she shrieked, Emma accepted a glass of champagne from a shocked footman, took a sip, then threw that one on Cressida, as well.
Emma’s first thought was just how satisfying that had been. Her second thought was that the ballroom had grown very quiet, other than for Cressida’s shrieks. Exceedingly quiet. The kind of quiet which usually preceded a roar of whispered gossip.
A moment later, the roar materialized as Cressida’s mother came to envelope her daughter in a hug, though keeping enough distance between them so her gown didn’t get soaked, as well. Emma glanced around to see if there was any more throwable champagne since Lady Carleton had certainly earned her own champagne shower over the years. But, alas, the footmen had all run far away from Emma.
Perhaps later.
The next thing Emma knew, Audsley was at her side, as calm as she’d ever seen him while Cressida was still complaining for everyone to hear.
For once Emma didn’t feel comforted by Audsley’s presence, especially when they were joined by Lady Embry a moment later. Their hostess was all smiles, as if this had been a portion of the planned entertainment. She quickly escorted Cressida to the ladies’ retiring room as the rest of the room gaped at the new Countess of Audsley and the unfortunate earl who’d had the misfortune to marry her.
Then Audsley broke the silence. “Would you care to dance?”
Emma cared to be anywhere other than the center of everyone’s attention, so she nodded, then allowed her husband to whisk her about the dance floor. “Audsley…”
“Not here,” he said without rancor. There was no censor, but there was also none of the warmth Emma was used to when he was holding her this close. There was no humor, no conspiratorial look, as if he knew she must have been justified in what she’d done and they’d likely laugh about it later. No, if anything, there was the look of someone desperately trying to make the best of a situation but knowing nothing would ever make this right.
They stayed at the ball another hour after that, leaving before supper was served. They spent most of their time near each other, as Audsley introduced her to several of his colleagues, all of whom looked at her as if she were some odd specimen in a zoo. The kind which might be rabid.
Audsley made his excuses to Embry for missing supper and they were almost to the door when Lady Embry stopped them.
“Lady Embry, please accept my apology for the disturbance earlier,” said a miserable Emma. She really hadn’t wanted to make a scene at this ball and she really didn’t want to apologize to the lady who might already be having an affair with Emma’s husband. But it was her ball and Emma had been raised with manners, all evidence to the contrary that night. Audsley looked at her a bit oddly as she apologized, but Emma knew she’d been in the wrong. Not for throwing a drink on Cressida. The miserable creature had deserved worse for what she’d said about Daphne. But Emma shouldn’t have spoiled the party while doing so. If she had gone to the trouble of hosting a ball, she certainly wouldn’t appreciate a harridan making such a display.
Of course, she wouldn’t have invited Cressida, either.
The ever gracious, incredibly beautiful Lady Embry smiled. “Every hostess secretly wishes for a contretemps which will be discussed for days to come. I believe you gave me mine without any real damage being done. So, I should be thanking you. Have a good evening, Emma, Audsley. I do hope we’ll see each other again.” With that, Lady Embry floated across the foyer on her way back to her beautiful ball.
Emma sighed, feeling Audsley’s silent disapproval, even as the butler brought her cloak and her husband draped it around her.
They waited outside in silence for their carriage, ever conscious of the hovering servants. Finally, they were inside the carriage and on their way home. “Audsley, I am sorry for creating a disturbance.”
“You did make a memorable first impression as my wife.”
Emma waited to see if he would say anything else, if he would show any sign of humor in that statement, but he was perfectly serious. That made Emma’s heart sink.
He continued. “I take it Cressida made a terrible comment about Daphne?”
“How did you know?”
“Because you could have laughed off any insult to you but would not allow one against a friend to go unanswered.”
Emma was filled with relief. He understood. “She did. I even warned her to stop talking about Daphne.”
“But she persisted.” Emma nodded. Audsley did, as well. “I’m sure she deserved what you did to her – even more so when I’m certain she insulted you, as well.”
“So, you’re not angry?”
There was a judicious pause before he replied. “It wasn’t ideal behavior for your introduction to the ton. And I am quite certain Cressida purposely goaded you, though she likely didn’t anticipate the good soaking she received in response.”
“Had there been a fountain nearby, she’d be soaking wet from head to toe, if not drowned.”
“Then perhaps we should avoid outdoor entertainments when Cressida is in attendance. I do not blame you for defending Daphne. But, Emma, the ton is filled with mean-spirited people like Cressida who will make it their business now to see if they can get you to make a scene.”
“But she deserved it!”
“I have no doubt she did. Yet you are the one people will remember and not in a good way.”
“And it will reflect poorly upon you.”
Again, there was a judicious silence. Finally, he said quietly, “Yes. It will reflect poorly upon me.”
Emma felt like the bottom of her world had just fallen out. She was embarrassing him. All her fears about having to change to fit into the ton were now coming true. “But if they’re all like that, why do we have to spend time among them?”
“This is our world. These are my colleagues from the House of Lords, noblemen I work with on legislation. Our sons will go to school together and marry other men’s daughters. It is the way it has always been. We must at least try to fit into this world for the good of our children.”
Emma put her hand on her stomach and Audsley watched her do it. He then put his hand over hers. “Have patience, Emma. It is easier to play the game when one has more experience.”
He kissed her and put his arm around her for the remaining journey home. A part of her wanted to ask about Lady Embry, but an even bigger part of her didn’t want to hear the answer. So, she remained as she was, with one of his hands over hers and leaning against him.
She could only pray matters would work themselves out so that she didn’t have to compete with the beautiful woman she’d thought was her friend.