Chapter Twenty-Six #2
“It is. But Zach…Detective Copeland and his whole department have been wonderful.” She glanced at Zach and then quickly away.
She felt the blush on her cheeks, and when she looked up, Cooper was wearing a small, knowing smile.
He winked, and an awkward laugh bubbled up her throat.
Cooper had obviously noted her reaction to Zach.
God, she really didn’t know how to take friendly teasing anymore, how to be…
light and…casual. Maybe she’d lost the ability completely.
She wiped her palms on her jeans, feeling nervous and fidgety despite her happiness at seeing Cooper.
“Tell me what’s going on in your life, Cooper. ”
“Nothing too exciting. I’ve been in a few relationships recently, but they were all short-term. I’ve been working at an architectural firm downtown.”
“That’s great.” So he’d gotten his degree, the job he wanted. It was another reminder of how she’d remained stagnant while everyone else had moved on. But she wasn’t in the mood for a pity party. She was making strides, and now that she’d started, she knew she wouldn’t stop.
Another car could be heard crunching over gravel in the driveway, and Zach stood. “I’ll get it,” he said.
A minute later, Josie heard voices at the door, and a second after that, Reagan and a man Josie didn’t know walked into the living room.
Josie stood, and Reagan moved quickly toward her on a small squeal.
Josie felt a tidal wave of emotion slam into her as she hugged the woman who had been her best friend.
She clung to her, sweet nostalgia making her eyes burn.
“Oh my gosh, Reagan,” she said, standing back and wiping a tear from her eye.
“You look amazing.” And she did. It hardly seemed as though nine years had passed.
She looked like the same bright-eyed college girl she’d been when Josie had first met her.
“So do you. Wow,” Reagan said, wiping her own tears away. She turned, holding out her hand to the man who’d entered the room. Josie wobbled, feeling slightly off balance as she watched him approach. She knew him. How did she know him? “This is my husband, Evan,” Reagan said.
Evan approached, his eyes darting over her once before he met her gaze. “Hi, Josie.”
“I know you,” she murmured. “I’ve…met you before.”
Reagan bobbed her head. “I met him in geology class at UC,” she said. “We started dating right before…” She cleared her throat, looked away.
Right before you disappeared.
She stared at Evan. “Yes,” she murmured. “You were there that night too.”
“Yes,” Reagan said. “That’s the reason I wanted him here. I mean, other than for you to meet the man I love.” She smiled as she gripped his arm. Josie looked back and forth between them, and then to Cooper who was watching them all closely.
Why did Josie feel so faint? As though she’d suddenly been shoved back through a time tunnel and she didn’t have a good grasp on the present? “I…ah, cookies.” She shook her head to clear her brain, giving them a small, embarrassed smile. “I mean, I made cookies. I’ll—”
“I’ll grab them,” Zach said. Her eyes locked with his, and she suddenly felt more grounded. More…real. Present.
“Thank you, Zach.” Her muscles relaxed as she turned to the others. “Let’s sit. Thank you all again, so much, for being here.”
Reagan and her husband, Evan, sat on the couch, and Reagan smiled at Cooper. “Hey, Coop.”
“Reagan. Evan.”
Josie sat back. “Have you two seen each other much over the years?”
“Not enough,” Cooper said with a shrug. “Life, you know.”
“I get it.” Zach returned and put the plate of cookies in the middle of the table. “I know you guys reached out to me in the beginning, and I want to let you know how much I appreciate it. I just wasn’t in a place to reach back. And I hope…I hope you can forgive me.”
“Oh, Josie,” Reagan said. “There’s nothing to apologize for.”
“We’re the ones who should be sorry, Josie,” Cooper said. “We gave up too quickly.”
“No. No. You tried for a long time. Too long considering I gave you no indication I wanted you to keep trying.”
“We’re just glad you reached out at all, Jos,” Reagan said.
Josie felt an unexpected release of tension at the warm forgiveness extended to her.
The understanding. It was as if she wasn’t…
so alone. These people had known her, were from before, and it somehow tethered her to both times.
Before and after. She hadn’t even realized how healing that would feel. “And we’re all here now,” Reagan added.
Josie set her hands on her knees, bending her fingers and then flattening them again. “Ah, so I told you guys on the phone the reason I hoped you’d be able to come here today. The case…”
They nodded, and Cooper grabbed a cookie and took a bite.
They’d both seen the news, knew about the copycat.
Cooper had told her he’d wanted to call her but had hesitated in doing so after all the time that had passed.
She understood. “The police”—she glanced at Zach—“believe the abductions, both mine and the recent ones, might have something to do with Professor Merrick.”
Cooper stared, chewing slowly, and Reagan looked shocked. “Professor Merrick?” she whispered.
“You do remember him, right?” Josie asked.
“Of…of course.” Reagan glanced at Evan.
“The guy you were seeing?” Cooper asked, glancing at Zach as though he might have just shared a secret Josie hadn’t wanted shared.
But she nodded quickly. “Yes. The man I had an affair with. The police believe the other two women found murdered had a relationship with him as well.”
“No shit?” Cooper asked.
“I’m just wondering if you might be able to think back, remember anything about him that still sticks out.” She shrugged sort of helplessly. “I don’t know, but…some small thing might be helpful.”
“I didn’t know the guy,” Cooper offered. “I only knew his name through you. I knew you were upset about things ending.”
That wasn’t totally accurate. She’d been upset about finding out he was married and had a difficult time letting go.
She’d latched on to him, her dysfunctional emotions making it hard to walk away.
But she didn’t say any of that. When she looked over at Reagan, Reagan was still wide-eyed, hands fidgeting in her lap.
She glanced at Evan again and sighed. “Maybe it doesn’t even matter, but after you went missing, we were all beside ourselves.
We spent so many hours printing flyers, making calls to news stations, just trying to get the word out and then to keep the story alive. ”
A knot of guilt twisted in Josie’s stomach. They’d done so much for her when she’d disappeared, and she’d repaid them by ignoring their calls when she’d escaped.
“It was an emotional time,” Reagan said. “Professor Merrick came over a couple of times, asked what he could do to help…” She winced and her eyes filled with regret. “One night…it was late, I’d been crying, he comforted me and…”
“One thing led to another,” Josie finished dully. She wasn’t angry…exactly. Just…God, that’s what Reagan had been doing while she sat terrified and alone in a warehouse room?
“Yes. It only happened once and I…” Reagan glanced at Evan again, whose expression was blank.
“I confessed to Evan. We’d only been seeing each other for a short time then.
” She grabbed his hand, squeezed, and he offered her a thin smile.
“He forgave me and we moved on. I told Vau…Professor Merrick that it wasn’t going to happen again.
He stayed away after that. I haven’t seen him since.
In the end, everything that happened, that terrible time, brought Evan and me closer. ”
Josie let out a long, slow breath, letting go of the momentary bitterness that had gripped her.
She’d made bad choices too, hoped for grace.
How honorable would it be if she now withheld it from others?
Cooper had picked up another cookie and had a mouthful, and Zach was looking at Reagan, his expression a mixture of surprise and suspicion.
He glanced at Josie, his gaze lingering as though he was wondering how the news that her friend had slept with the man she’d been involved with in the aftermath of her disappearance affected her.
She wasn’t angry with Reagan. And she was long over Professor Merrick.
“He was, probably is, extremely charming when he wants to be,” Josie said. “No one knows that better than me.”
“I hope you don’t hate me for it,” Reagan said. “If I could go back…”
“I could never hate you, Reagan,” Josie said.
“And that was a long time ago.” She leaned forward, reaching across the coffee table.
Reagan reached back, and Josie gripped her hand.
Reagan gave her a grateful smile. “Thank you for being honest about that.” Josie looked over at Zach. “That might help in some way.”
They talked for a little while longer, the conversation moving on to less heavy subject matters.
She told them about fixing up the farmhouse, and when they asked if she’d met any neighbors, she told them about the woman named Rain, thinking to herself that she was going to make a point to visit her as she’d offered.
Friends, she’d been reminded, were a vital part of a full life.
Zach disappeared back onto the porch where Josie heard him on the phone again as she caught up with her friends, all of them chuckling at remembered shared jokes.
When they got up to leave, Josie’s heart felt lighter, and she was glad she’d reconnected with them.
Perhaps they’d do it regularly once life returned to normal for her, whatever that might mean.
The picture of the farmhouse wavered before her, the grass swaying in the peaceful breeze, Zach stepping out onto the porch, a smile on his face… Again, she pushed that idyllic image away. It was both welcome and terrifying.