Chapter 23
twenty-three
brEE
We’ve fallen into a comfortable silence. I’m tucked into his arms, my body finally surrendering to the comfort and safety he offers. It’s the kind of peace I’ve been yearning for.
“I’m so glad you’re here,” I whisper.
His lips brush against my temple in a gentle kiss. “Can we talk about the fact that you’ve been working yourself to death?”
My stomach tightens, and I quickly shake my head. “Can we…not?”
I mean it. I really don’t want to talk about it. The truth is, I’m not sure I can without falling apart. I’ve been drowning in work, pushing myself to the brink just to avoid confronting how much I’ve missed him. What if I scare him off?
His usually carefree expression shifts, turning serious. He looks down at me, his hand gently rubbing my arm. “Bree… What’s going on?”
His genuine concern melts away the last of my reservations. “I missed you. Terribly. Picking up some extra shifts was a good distraction. Well…until it wasn’t.” I wince.
His arms tighten around me, pulling me closer, and I revel in the rise and fall of his chest as he exhales a deep sigh. “I missed you, too. More than you know.” His voice is low, thick with guilt and longing. “But you can’t keep doing this to yourself. It’s not healthy.”
I nod against him, my voice barely a whisper.
“I know.” I pause, fighting the lump in my throat.
“But every time I stop moving, stop working, I think about how far away you are, and I was afraid…” My voice cracks, betraying me in the worst way.
I just stopped crying, damn it. And now, the tears are threatening to spill again.
He pulls back, lifting my chin to meet his gaze. “Afraid of what, Sunshine?”
My heart stutters, and I take a shaky breath. “That the distance is too much, and that it might not be worth it for you.”
A flicker of hurt flashes crosses his face, and guilt claws at me. I want to take it back. I need to take it back.
“Have I ever, even once, given you the impression that this isn’t worth it?” he asks, his voice strained. “That we aren’t worth it?”
I shake my head. “No, you haven’t. It’s just…my own insecurities getting the best of me.”
His thumbs swipe away the tears that have slipped past my control. “Listen to me, Bree,” he says, his voice unwavering. “You are worth everything to me. The distance, the long nights, the missed calls…all of it. I crossed a fucking ocean for you, and I’d do it a million times more.”
There’s a lump in my throat the size of an iceberg. I’m pretty sure if I open my mouth again, it’ll just be a chorus of ugly sobs. Instead of replying with some profound, heartfelt declaration of my own, all that comes out is, “I’m sorry.”
“Please don’t apologize,” he says. “It just breaks my heart to know you’ve been struggling like this on your own…
again.” His head inclines slightly, his gaze locking with mine, searching for the reassurance he needs.
“You can trust me, aye? I don’t say things I don’t mean,” he continues.
“And I meant it when I said we’d figure this out together. ”
I nod as his words work their magic. He’s peeling away the layers of fear I’ve been suffocating under, and for a moment, I can breathe again. But even though his words soothe the ache that’s been gnawing at me for weeks, it doesn’t change the fact that I’m living two separate lives.
There’s the one without him, where I work, exist, and force myself to get through the days. Where I’m just passing through, waiting for something to give. And then there’s the life I have when we’re together, the one that feels more like me than anything else. It’s everything, but it’s fleeting.
“Hey,” he says, pulling me from my thoughts. “I’m here. Even if you think I’m too good to be true.”
I blink, completely thrown off. “What?”
He shrugs, his grin turning playful. “You’ve got that look, like you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop. I promise, I’m real. You want me to prove it?”
I raise a brow, a smile tugging at the corner of my lips. “How exactly would you do that?”
He leans in closer, his breath warm against my skin, and my whole body shivers with awareness. His lips hover a breath away from mine.
“Could an imaginary boyfriend do this?”
He presses a gentle kiss to the tip of my nose, his lips lingering just long enough to make my heart skip a beat.
I open my mouth to speak, but before I can, he tilts his head, his lips brushing my cheek in a way that sends sparks across my skin. When his mouth moves to the corner of mine, the whole world narrows to this single, suspended moment. He’s so close but not close enough.
“Or this?” he murmurs.
And then, without another word, his lips finally meet mine.
The kiss starts slow, the unbearable longing burning through every inch of my body.
His lips move against mine with a hunger that matches my own, and it’s impossible to hold back.
My hands tangle in his hair, tugging him closer, every inch of me craving him.
My body presses against his as if it’s the only place I’ve ever known, and the only place I ever want to be.
I needed this. Weeks of distance and emptiness fade into nothing and every second apart is wiped away, replaced by his heat and the raw urgency of our bodies colliding together.
His lips are soft, but the kiss is anything but gentle.
It’s desperate, frantic, like neither of us can get close enough, and I’m lost in it. Lost in him.
When we finally pull apart, our foreheads meet, both of us gasping for breath. It’s still not enough.
“Real enough for you?” His voice is a deep rasp, but the tenderness underneath it makes my heart clench.
I laugh, breathless, my fingers brushing over his jawline as I nod my head slowly. “Yes,” I whisper. “You’re very, very real.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” he replies. “Not as long as you’ll have me.”
I pull him into another kiss. There are no words to express how much I’ve missed him, so instead, I let my lips do the talking. When he responds, pulling me deeper, every ounce of that need is met.
When we break apart again, his fingers glide over my cheek, tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “I’m pretty sure I just kissed you into a puddle. Admit it. I’m unforgettable.”
“A puddle? Humble much?” I raise a brow, fighting a laugh. “Let’s not get carried away. You’re more like…mildly memorable.”
His jaw drops in offense. “Mildly memorable? I’m wounded. I crossed an ocean and faced your beast of a dog to get to you.”
“You’re lucky I like you,” I tease.
“Lass, I just kissed you like it was my life’s mission, and all I get is a like?”
“Well…” I drag the word out, tapping my chin like I’m deep in thought. “I suppose you could’ve done a better job.”
Before I can say anything else, he lunges at me, tackling me onto the couch with a playful growl that sends a rush of excitement through my veins. “Take it back!”
I burst into laughter, my chest heaving as I try to catch my breath. “Okay, okay! I take it back, you ridiculous man!”
I can see the satisfaction in his eyes as he hovers above me, still holding me down. “Better. I knew you’d come to your senses.”
I shake my head, my giggles slowing. “You’re impossible.”
“And you’re stuck with me,” he says softly, his voice turning serious as he rolls us onto our sides, wrapping his arms around me with a sense of finality that makes my heart swell. “Forever, if I have my way.”
Yeah. Me, too.