Chapter 16 Holly #2
He laughs and shakes his head. “No, I’m just a guy that wants you to feel comfortable eating whatever you want to in front of me.
I might own a gym, but I still love carbs.
You are stunning and your body is…” He trails off and for a second I panic about what he’s going to say, but the look on his face makes me relax. “Fucking perfect.”
He's genuine about wanting me to be comfortable enough to choose what I truly want, and the fact that he thought of that before I even had the chance to ponder only makes me like him more. Knowing that he isn’t majorly strict about his own diet too helps to put me at ease.
It’s hard not to feel gluttonous when your date is eating a lean chicken salad and you’re tucking into a huge juicy burger.
“Bella!” Signore Giordano calls out and appears at our side. “Signora Holly, it is such a pleasure to see you here. It has been too long!”
I smile up at the familiar man, as his friendly accented voice brings a smile to my face.
He’s right, it has been a long time since I came to the restaurant.
It’s not the same visiting a restaurant by yourself when everyone in the town knows about your break-up and the reason that you’re dining alone.
Bear and I are sure to be the gossip of the town, but for once, I don’t really mind.
Honestly, I am just enjoying having a nice occasion to eat out.
Having the restaurant owner coming over to take our order especially is an honour and it’s lovely to see him in his element.
“Welcome to you, Signora, and your handsome friend too. That Jake was an idiot to give you up.” I can’t hide my wince at the mention of Jake, but thankfully he’s turned his attention to Bear so I don’t think he sees it.
He would be devastated if he knew he’d upset me.
“You treat our Holly with the respect she deserves.” He shakes his finger at Bear, which looks ridiculous given the size difference between them.
Bear looks at him solemnly and nods deeply. “I plan to, sir.”
The signore bustles at being called sir, smiling and clapping Bear on the back, giving his approval. “Good, this is what I want to hear.”
Thankfully, he doesn’t seem to have anything else to say about my ex.
Bear does not want to hear about my ex on our first date.
I can’t help but wonder about Clay and how he’s feeling about all of this.
I am drawn to him just as much as I am to Bear.
The feelings I have for them are different, but at the same time, just as important.
Clayton is dark and intense; he gives me the feeling of safety and a promise of adoration.
Thinking of him makes me want to curl up in a dark room, our bodies entwined where we can whisper our secrets in the shadows.
Whereas Bear is the opposite, the sunshine of my day.
He brings out the light inside me, reminding me of the joy in the everyday.
I know it sounds ridiculous given how long I have known them and the limited time we’ve spent together, but there is something right about them being in my life.
I shouldn’t feel guilty about this date with Bear. I have made no promises to either one, and I have to get to know them better if I’m to make a decision. I’m not even sure if I’m ready for a relationship, but they have hijacked my life and now I’m rethinking my plans.
“Wine is on the house for my favourite baker!” Signore Giordano calls out loudly, making sure the server at the bar hears. With how my ears are ringing, I don’t think that’s going to be a problem.
We spend the next minute choosing our meals and discussing wine pairings. He then takes our order and leaves the two of us alone. Someone from the other side of the restaurant notices me and waves, and smiling, I do the same.
“You seem popular around here.”
Turning my attention back on Bear, my smile becomes a little bashful and I attempt to shrug it off.
“Everyone loves the woman who makes cakes. Besides, it’s a small town, everyone knows each other.
” I tilt my head ever so slightly in the direction of the diners who had acknowledged me only a moment ago.
“Gossip travels quickly. By tomorrow, everyone will know that we were on a date.”
Not to mention that Signore Giordano is one of the biggest gossips of them all. What he doesn’t know about the dealings of Hinton Grove isn’t worth knowing.
“So, this definitely is a date then?” The smile Bear flashes me is devilish.
I could blush and simper, backtrack and try to avoid the question, but if I ever want to move on from my past, then I need to own it. “Does this dress look like something I would wear to a business meeting?”
“That dress…” he trails off, licking his bottom lip as he gets completely distracted looking over said dress. “If I look at it any longer then I’m going to say something I might regret at a later date when I’m not distracted by your beauty.”
Snorting a laugh, I take a sip of my wine and roll my eyes, when secretly, I am thrilled by his comment.
The rest of our meal flies by and I can’t quite believe that two hours have passed.
Conversation has flowed freely between us and there were no awkward moments.
Our meals were perfect, and we even shared some of our food.
I felt like we were in the cliché spaghetti moment from Lady and the Tramp.
There were no almost-kisses over pasta, more’s the pity, but food from his plate, offered on extended cutlery, tasted so much better than should be possible.
We only leave the restaurant because it is shutting, so we decide to take a walk around the park before ending the date. I don’t want it to come to an end. Everything else fades away when we’re together like this, and going home to my empty apartment is only going to bring me back to reality.
My hand is clutched in his as we stroll slowly through the park, side by side. They fit as though they were made for each other, and tingles run up the entire length of my arm. I’ve not felt like this in so long, if ever.
The silence between us is companionable, neither of us feeling the need to fill the space with pointless words.
Full and happy, we are content to enjoy our moonlit stroll.
Everything looks different by starlight, and although I’ve lived here my whole life, I feel as though I’m seeing Hinton Grove through new eyes – and I suspect that has something to do with the man beside me.
Glancing up at him slyly through my eyelashes, I try to judge his expression.
I wish there was a way of knowing if he’s feeling the same sense of…
excitement and new beginnings that I am.
He looks so content, a soft smile on those sinful lips.
Thankfully I’m getting away with watching him, cataloguing every detail and–
His head turns and he catches my eyes, grinning. Caught. He knew I was watching him and was letting me think I was being sneaky. Laughing, I shake my head at myself. His deep chuckle only makes me laugh more, happiness blooming in my chest.
Up ahead, the park path ends, leading us back into the town and civilisation. My heart sinks, knowing our time together is over.
Clearing his throat, Bear squeezes my hand. “It’s getting late. I should walk you home.”
Do I hear disappointment in his voice or is that just wishful thinking? I think I’m just projecting my own feelings, but it’s nice to think that he’s just as sad our date is over as I am.
“Oh, yes. Of course.” I’m fully aware that my smile is dimming and that my reluctance is clear for him to hear, but I just don’t have the energy to force happiness.
I don’t want this night to end, so why would I be happy that the date is over?
Honestly, I’m not bothered that he can see my true emotions right now, as they speak far louder than any words I could muster.
We walk back to the bakery and he silently opens the door that leads to the staircase up to my apartment, gesturing for me to go in first. I’d expected us to part ways here, but it seems he wants to make sure I get into my apartment without issue.
Smiling my thanks, I duck my head and pass him, walking up the stairs and searching for my keys in my bag.
His stare on me is hot as he slowly climbs the stairs behind me. I pretend that I’m not aware that he’s eye-fucking me right now, when in reality, it is all I can do to keep standing. How could I not know when my body burns for him?
Finally I find my damn keys and turn to face him, flushed but smiling. “Thank you for a wonderful night. I had a great time.”
His returning smile makes my legs shake. “I did too.”
“Do you want to come in for a bit? I can make coffee.” It’s a risky question, one that I blurt out without giving myself chance to think it through. Will he think that I’m inviting him in for sex? Am I hoping that’s what he might think and that he might act on it?
His expression shifts and he makes a pained-sounding groan. “I would love to, but I really don’t think that’s a good idea.”
My heart sinks and I feel sick. What was I thinking?
“Oh.” I sound as disappointed as I feel, and immediately regret it. I need to backtrack, to protect myself. “Yeah, I understand.” My voice is high and tight, not sounding believable in the slightest.
Shit. I am so fucking stupid. Of course he doesn’t want to come inside. He took me on a first date, a really good one, and I have completely jumped the gun. I had such a great time that I’ve assumed that he’s feeling the same way I am. Apparently this is not the case.