Chapter 3
Be Kind. Be Quiet.
Cora
The walk back into the main part of the castle was always depressing. The cold, dreary darkness opening up into the opulent gold made me want to return to my room. However, I knew that wasn’t what was in my near future.
His fingers dug deeply into my bicep, and I was left grateful that he kept his nails short and blunt, for there would surely be thin lines of blood left behind otherwise.
I glanced over at him, only allowing myself a brief moment to take in his current mood.
We weren’t supposed to look at him unless first given permission.
After so many years here by his side, you would think I’d know this and stay along the lines he’d given me, but I never did.
I couldn’t help myself lately, pushing the boundaries felt like breathing.
I used to be good, his perfect little dove.
The one female in his entourage that would help him forget about my sister—but things had changed and I was finding it harder to walk those lines and be that female for him.
“I don’t recall inviting you down there, Cora.” It wasn’t a question and the tone of his voice conveyed easily just how unhappy he was with the choices I’d made.
“I know, Master,” I replied back quietly. My voice barely above a whisper, but plenty loud enough for his hearing to pick up.
“Then do you care to explain why I had to gaze upon your face in such filth? A place you were not invited into? Wearing your court attire? Offering up opinions I did not ask for? Must I remind you what happened the last time you interfered in places and situations that did not concern you?” My palms started to sweat as minuscule black dots swam about my vision. “Speak, Cora,” he demanded.
My gaze flew to him and then back towards the floor in the span of a breath.
“I did not wish for you to destroy the one link we may have to bring her home. I made a mistake before, I can’t—won’t do it again, Master, please.
Please allow me to help,” I begged, the half-truth tasting bitter on my tongue.
I could feel his eyes searing into my skin as if he owned the fire magic some of his court believed him to have. “What could you possibly help me with, Cora?”
My gaze stuck to the ground, unsure of what to say or do.
I hadn’t thought this far ahead. I just knew deep in my gut where my magic laid bare and untouched, that killing him was the wrong decision.
A feeling I felt inclined to see through.
The raven shifter was nothing to me. Sure, I knew my sister loved him, but aside from making her happy, I had no loyalty to the male.
Which I felt I’d proven—to Keres and myself—when I’d told him I’d spotted a raven shifter flying close to the castle all those nights ago.
Keres didn’t know about all of my magic, because while I’d loved him deeply, I knew his moods couldn’t always be trusted. He’d loved Silv, but I saw how deeply that love had corrupted him and festered into what it was when I’d helped her out of this castle.
Letting out a breath and forcing words from my mouth before his patience could draw too thin. “I could help you torture him, or I could even—”
“Stop,” he demanded, and as if a magical pull commanded it, I listened. I fucking hated that I listened. “I have an idea.” He looked over at the guard behind him, a smile growing on his face. “Call a meeting with my circle.”
His hand in mine, the grip tightened as we walked. He didn’t speak another word. His blunt nails driving back into my skin as if all they’d done was caress their way down my arm to find my hand.
At times like this, I ached not to remember the past. I wished to leave it where it lied, but the past didn’t work that way.
It had a way of being left in the back of your mind to rot and fester—much like love.
And when you didn’t purge the rot, it spread until all of you was drowning in it with no way out.
I felt that way, the drowning, as he dragged me down the hallway to continue discussing a plan I was allowed no comments on.
My knees sat against the floor next to his chair while he told the males worthy of his time about his plans for Cedar.
My mind was shutting down, and the past that I tried desperately to bury was forcing its way towards the front—beyond my control.
Things I buried behind the mental obsidian wall I’d spent so long building, was crumbling the more I tried to hold the structure together.
“So we’re in agreement? Cora will seduce the male and get us what we need?” Keres’s tone of enjoyment brought me back to the conversation, away from my crumbling mental fortress.
“You want me to do what?” My eyes shot around the room as the words sank into my subconscious, only to in turn realize what I’d done.
My gaze dropped back towards the floor and I felt my nails dig into my palms, trying to ground myself and keep my body from physically retreating away from the males around the table.
Don’t show weakness.
Don’t reveal the power you have.
Always be exactly what they need—nothing more, nothing less.
My mother’s words echoed throughout my head on repeat, as they always did.
Be kind. Be quiet. Amendable. Generous in all things. Graceful.
The words on a loop, all of the words—I was spiraling and I couldn’t spiral. Not now. Not yet.
I felt my magic in my palms as I slowly released enough of it through each finger to just feel. A slow breath released from my nose, relieving a small amount of pressure deep in my chest. Deep honey brown eyes popped into the forefront of my mind, but I pushed it down with the rot.
“You’ll do what you’re told, Cora,” Keres stated plainly, as if he hadn’t noticed my mental breakdown and rebuild.
“Of course, Master.” And I would. I’d do whatever I was told.
What use was a female if they chose otherwise?
Keres had his hand around my forearm—the rest of the table leaving—as he pulled me in front of a tall male with long reddish-brown hair and pure white eyes. His hair was pulled half back, with the rest cascading down his shoulders. But the part that truly stood out were his ears. They were pointed.
“You’re…” I began, but Keres dug his nails into my arm once again and I stopped myself.
“This is Lovel. He’ll be staying with us for a while as our guest, and I expect you to treat him as such.” I found myself nodding without much else to say about it.
Lovel reached down, taking my other hand in his own as he bowed slightly and lightly pressed his lips to the back of my palm. “It is a pleasure to meet you, Lady Cora. Our Lord has said a great deal about you.”
“Of course, you as well,” I replied, though it was more of a whisper.
Something about this male unnerved me and it had nothing to do with what he was and more to do with where he came from. I cleared my throat and excused myself once it seemed appropriate.
I needed to work on a plan for Cedar, one that ensured I’d be useful and not dead from failing him. Again.