Chapter 13 #2
Now it was I who was struggling to keep the eye rolls to a minimum.
I sighed and walked over to his window, looking up at the sky that was slowly growing lighter, a deep shade of purple filtering into the cell.
“Tell me about her, my sister.” I knew I wouldn’t get anything out of him, not outright at least.
“Why?” he questioned.
“I don’t know this version of her. The version you’ve come to know so well, and if we’re being honest towards each other, I never will. You’ll be the only link I have to her, Cedar.” As my gaze fell back towards him, I hoped he could feel the sincerity in my voice.
He watched me, his emotions carefully guarded.
“She’s strong, stronger than she’ll ever give herself credit for.
She protects the people around her, even when they don’t ask and it costs her more than it feels it’s worth.
She never asks for anything in return though.
Selfless, but not in a martyr sort of way.
In the way that says she’s out to save the world.
” He shook his head, a small smile on his face.
“She believes that her knives and a few sassy remarks can fix any problem, no matter how big or small.”
I swallowed back the emotions fighting their way to the surface and my eyes returned to the sky. “You sound like you know her well.”
Cedar chuckled, but it lacked humor. “That happens when you spend years with someone, divulging things about yourself no one else knows, Princess.” He was quiet for a moment before he cleared his throat. “You were the one thing she never forgot, Cora.”
A storm of feelings punctured my chest, and I realized this wasn’t a conversation I was ready to be having. I set his cup down on the floor and let myself out of his cell without another word.
My feet glided along the glossy golden floors.
Maybe they’d just been waxed before this took place—I’d never given it much thought seeing as during this moment, even in my dreams, I was more focused on everything else happening around me than I was on how the ridiculous golden floors looked like that day.
“Oh great. Now I’m dreaming about your life?” he asked from behind me. I smirked, but ensured it disappeared before I looked over my shoulder at him.
“Why are you half naked?” I asked, my eyes unable to not look at him, top to bottom.
He was in absolutely nothing but a pair of loose black pants.
His long brown hair thrown over one shoulder with small braids throughout.
One side was shaved, and I always expected it to be longer when I saw him next, but it never was.
As if he somehow willed it to not grow there.
I wanted to lean down and lick the scars up his side, but I pushed that thought away for another time.
Cedar looked down at his clothes and rocked back on his heels before his gaze met mine with a shrug. “Well, this is your dream, Princess. At least, I’m beginning to assume it’s your dream. So, you tell me why I’m half naked. Couldn’t even manifest me shoes? Ridiculous.”
I shook my head, forcing my feet forward, following along to where I knew we were headed.
“I’m starting to think you stealing my blood did more than just refresh your sunny disposition.
” I looked over to find him striding beside me, his gaze on the other me.
I wasn’t sure how else to describe it, but I wasn’t going to be replying to his statement.
He wasn’t wrong, but what was I supposed to say?
You’re right, darling, I was busy using blood magic on you to save your life so my sister may one day forgive me for stealing all of her memories and leaving her in the snow alone.
Plus, by the way, the idea of your dead body lying there on the floor made me sick to my stomach, so I couldn’t lounge around and do nothing.
“Guess we’re not talking about that. So, what are we doing here? ”
I stopped in the middle of the hall—it wasn’t as if I needed to know where I was going, I’d lived this event many times over—and stared up at him. He matched me, move for move, turning to peer down at me as if he had it all figured out, my every secret.
Fuck, maybe he did if that look on his face was anything to go by.
“What is it you think is happening, Cedar?” I questioned carefully.
I tried not to fidget with my dress, the fabric there below my fingertips.
I didn’t want Cedar here, I didn’t want him to see this.
But I had a strong feeling that the Fates were working more than my blood magic was, and I wouldn’t have much of a choice in the matter.
He smirked, an eyebrow raised. “I think you’ve messed with things you shouldn’t have, Princess, and now it’s come to bite us both in the ass.
We’re clearly invading each other’s sleeping thoughts, and while that may be normal for your witchy ways, it sure as fuck isn’t normal for my sleepless nights.
” He looked down the hall where the other me had walked down.
“So, I’ll ask again,” his gaze returned to me, “what are we up to tonight?”
I swallowed, my throat suddenly tight, as I turned and started back down the hall. “We’re going to watch me ruthlessly gut someone.”
“Oh fun. Those are my favorite dreams.”
I ignored him, badly attempting to shake off the unease as we walked down the hall. Pushing open a door before the throne room, I guided us inside.
“What did you see, Krista?” the past me asked. I watched as this past version of myself scrunched her dress beneath her fingertips, relentlessly.
“Not very good at hiding your feelings back then, huh?” Cedar asked from beside me. I, once again, ignored him. He wasn’t wrong though. “What’s changed since then?”
My gaze snapped to him as I bit my tongue so hard the tinge of copper filled my mouth.
“Will you just stop talking? It’s bad enough you're here, the least you could do is just… hush.” I felt my chest heaving and as my nails dug into my palms, I tried to recenter myself.
My gaze turned back up from the floor as I felt him shift in front of me, his calloused hands coming up and gently squeezing my shoulders.
“Breathe, Princess,” he whispered. I tried not to flinch, but he felt it anyway.
“We can go back to trying to kill each other when we wake up and I’m not trapped in your head.
Now, what are we doing here?” His tone was gentle, as if I were a scared child he was trying to coax out from under the bed when a storm got bad in the middle of the night.
I had to bite back a laugh because no one had ever taken that tone with me and not meant for it to sound condescending.
But not Cedar, no. He’d never mean it that way simply because the male didn’t say things he didn’t mean.
I stepped away from him, watching as his arms dropped back by his sides.
I couldn’t be that close to him right now, and I couldn’t allow him to know he somewhat helped my nerves.
I looked past his tall form, towards where the scene was starting to unfold before us.
Clearing my throat, I glanced towards his face for the briefest of moments.
“This was the first time I killed anyone.”
Cedar met my eyes before looking back to the scene. “Her? What is she? Twelve?”
I shook my head. “Closer to fifteen,” I whispered.
“Why would you—” he began, but I shook my head, cutting him off. He could believe whatever he wanted about me. It didn’t matter, because at the end of the day I had done what I thought needed to be done, and I’d do it again.
I watched as Krista shook her head. Her pale skin was ashen, her light hair matted, and dried tears stained her face. Humans needed sunlight, but she hadn’t been allowed any in quite some time now.
“I have to tell him, Cora, I’m sorry… You know what will happen if I withhold the information from him… My family—” She sniffled as her face fell into her palms.
“Your family is already dead and you know it, Krista, all you're doing is making him more likely to kill mine.”
Her eyes rose to my dream self’s face as her lower lip trembled. “I’m sorry, Cora,” she whispered.
I didn’t bat an eyelash as I watched myself pull a dagger out from beneath the folds of my gown, and shove it into Krista’s throat.
She didn’t make a sound as I slit her throat and blood splattered down the front of me.
“I’d say I’m sorry, but I’m not ,Krista.
He cannot find her, and I’ll stop anyone who gets in my way of keeping her safe.
” I watched as my past self slowly wiped the blade of my dagger along Krista’s dress and then hid it again in the folds of my gown.
“What was she going to reveal?” Cedar questioned, no emotion in his tone whatsoever.
I turned and walked out of the room—the rest of the dream wasn’t something I was into living through again and I was surprised to find Cedar following after me.
“Where Silvana was.” I cleared my throat and wiped my palms against the gown I was wearing, refusing to turn around and take in the bloody scene again.
“She was a visionary Keres had found on his many hunts through the kingdom in search of Silvana. He kept Krista in complete isolation except for meetings with me while he tried to force her to use the threads to make the connection between the two of us and somehow use that knowledge to find where Silvana was.”
I swallowed, my throat tight as I stared at the ridiculous golden floor beneath my feet.
“I knew she was getting closer… Keres had already killed her entire family. That was his thing. He’d steal a girl he needed, turn her if needed, and kill her family so no one would care enough to come looking for her.
She thought she could save them, but really he would’ve just turned her and then added her to the list of females required to become breeding mares for his desires and goals.
” I smirked. “If you think about it, I saved her from a much worse fate.”
“Is that what happened to you?” Cedar asked. “He killed yours and Silvana’s parents and then told you, you could go back if you behaved?”
I chuckled. “No, Cedar, not at all. In fact, I watched while he killed my parents and I came along with him willingly.” I shook my head, refusing to meet his gaze.
I wasn’t even sure why I’d just told him that, but he knew now.
“Don’t attempt to make me into something I’m not, Cedar. You won’t like the outcome.”
I walked halfway down the hall, preparing to mentally force myself out of this dream and hopefully him as well before I turned back to look at him. “Oh, and by the way, your Shadow Lord will be here soon to rescue you. Try to act surprised and don’t get yourself killed prior to that. Please.”
He stared at me, eyes wide and lips slightly parted as I watched the world evaporate around him and I awoke alone in my bed.