Chapter 29
Vi drove home both proud of herself for her show of self-confidence in front of Blake and also sick at heart. She’d been pretty sure he wouldn’t want to commit, and she’d been right.
The tears started when she walked into the house and Mr. T ran to her and begged to be held. She picked him up and kissed his head. “I know you’re like this because you want more food, but at least you love me for feeding you.”
She texted Rose and Carmie. I need you both. Please come over.
Less than five minutes later, Rose let her know they were carpooling and on their way.
They came in together. One look at her face, and they led her to the couch and sat on either side of her. Comforting and supportive, and she appreciated them so much.
“What happened?” Rose asked and handed her a clean tissue from her purse.
“You two advised me to work on my self-confidence. I have been. Tonight, I screwed up my courage. I didn’t mention commitment, simply asked Blake if he could possibly visualize a future together.” Remembering, she broke into sobs. “He didn’t have an answer, couldn’t even think of one. In other words, he doesn’t.”
They consoled her with hugs and sympathetic murmurs. “You probably caught him off-guard, and he couldn’t think,” Rose said.
“That’s right,” Carmie agreed, “Tell me exactly what happened when you asked.”
“He gaped at me and was speechless.” Vi blew her nose. “As I suspected, his interest in me is mostly sexual.”
Rose placed her hand on Vi’s arm. “Could it be that he assumed sex was all you wanted?”
“I wouldn’t know. We never talked about it.” Vi exhaled a sad breath. “Or much else except to commiserate about Gran and Malcom. And a few other things, but very little about us.”
“That’s a conversation you might want to have with him later,” Carmie advised. “Give him time to think and get back to you.”
“What if he doesn’t?” Vi’s eyes filled again. “I’m thirty years old, my biological clock is ticking, and I want to get married and start a family. With or without him.” Although the thought of dating and finding someone else seemed impossible.
Carmie’s eyes widened. “When you make a decision, you don’t waste any time.”
“I’ve been thinking about marriage and kids for a while now. Tonight, I admitted it. And by the way, I’ve raised my standards. No more social misfits like the guys I’ve wasted so much time dating.” She felt compelled to add, “If I hadn’t met Blake, I wouldn’t have realized the rut I stuck myself in to.”
“Wow,” Rose said. “You’ve come a long way.”
“Exactly my thoughts,” Carmie seconded. “In a way, your feelings for Blake helped solidify what you really want. I’m proud of you for speaking up, and I have faith that no matter what happens, you’ll be all right.”
“Thanks. I love you both, but it’s getting late. You should go home.”
When they left after a comforting group hug, Vi felt better.
Two weeks passedwithout a word from Blake. As sad as Vi was, she refused to sit around moping. She poured herself into work and got together with her sister and Carmie and some of her friends at work. When Gran and Malcom returned from their honeymoon, she stopped by on Sunday to see them. They were both radiant and full of stories. Malcom had a doctor’s appointment, a check-up on his rib. Claiming he was healed, he went anyway. Leaving Vi and Gran alone.
She told Gran about Blake without going into much detail. “We’re not seeing each other right now, and I don’t know if we will in the future,” she finished, blinking back tears.
Gran laid a sympathetic hand over hers. “You really care about him, don’t you? Malcom and I knew you belonged together that first night we all met at dinner.”
Incredulous, Vi eyed her. “What?”
“That’s why we talked you up.”
“I don’t remember that.”
“I sang your praises and Malcom did the same with Blake.”
“You deliberately tried to match us up?” Wait’ll Blake heard about this. But she couldn’t tell him because they weren’t communicating anymore.
“That’s right, and it worked.”
“I wish. Blake isn’t sure what he wants.”
“I’m sorry, honey. Don’t give up—he’ll come to his senses.”
Vi raised her chin. “If he doesn’t, I’ll move on,” she vowed with a bravado she didn’t feel.
“That’s my girl,” Gran said. “Keep me posted, all right?”
Vi nodded. Since the night she’d asked Blake about the future, her self-confidence had ebbed, but she remained determined to boost it up. She stood in front of the mirror every morning and every night assuring herself that she was attractive and worth a man’s love. The more frequently she stated the words, the more she believed them.
“Eat your heart out, Blake,” she said several times.
It helped.