22. Chapter 22
Idon’t really remember the first couple of days in the hospital, but once the pain medication wore off, I think the nurses were happy to boot me off onto the general ward.
Mum never left my side and Dad was in and out trying to manage work, errands for us both and generally stepping out to give me time with Miles when he came to visit every day.
Harris and Em both came too–Em practically berated me for being such an idiot, so despite me being the one injured, I have to make it up to him for scaring him so much. Which is fair.
I only spent one night for observations on the ward, before being released with my bandages changed, stitches on my skull itchy and a banging headache already killing my eyes.
I’d snuggled into Miles neck the entire drive back to my student house, Dad making some jokes I didn’t really understand.
Apparently I’d spoken absolute bollocks when I was high on the pain meds, but I don’t remember a thing, so no skin off my nose.
It could explain why one nurse practically pushed me out of the hospital, but I’m just happy to be out of there.
I’m happy to be alive, because whilst I know I did the right thing getting Faye and Mason out of the house, I could have seriously been injured worse than I am.
My shoulder is sore and I can’t move it much, so as predicted I wasn’t surprised when coach benched me from playing rugby for the foreseeable future.
It’s my last year at university and honestly I’m over playing sports, especially when I can imagine all the free time I can have to spend with Miles.
I don’t plan for him to leave my side, which is why he’s currently sitting in the back of my parents car with me and an overnight bag by his feet.
I’ve never had to pull out the puppy dog eyes with him yet, but there is a first for everything and he caved in seconds.
Mum and Dad plan to stay in the city for a couple more days to make sure I’m settled and won’t just suddenly seize up and die on them–Mum’s words, dark humour not spared. Miles paled but then cracked up laughing, so I wonder if it’s a British thing, being so morbid it’s funny.
The next couple of days fly by in comfortable bliss, but I sleep a lot because of the headaches and my stitches are so fucking itchy.
I daren’t look at how much hair they shaved to sew me up, but when Mum showed Miles how to clean my head, he said it wasn’t so bad and sounded relieved.
He later kissed me stupid in my bed and told me he’d still like me bald, so I’m not too worried if I have to cut the rest of my hair short to match when the bandages come off.
No one wants me to move from my bed, but there's only so many days of Halloween movies and episodes of Gilmore Girls I can take. I’m used to working out everyday and my muscles feel stiff, so after a full week of bed rest in which Miles stayed over every night, spooning me to sleep, I asked Mum if she’d come with me for a little short trip into the city.
I just want to walk around and feel normal, and Miles’s mum actually wanted to catch up for coffee with him so we all headed in together.
Her house is apparently on the opposite side of town from where most of the students live, so we park in the middle and go our separate ways to my grumbling.
I’d have loved to have met his mum, but she only has a short break from work and Mum doesn’t want to go far from the house in case I get an intense headache.
I’m wearing sunglasses and actually have my bandage off to give the stitches some air, but I still daren’t look at the back of my head, so I keep my jacket hood drawn up.
“I want to make Miles a boo basket for Halloween.” I tell her as we enter one of her favourite home department stores, which sell pretty much everything and anything.
It’s like Aladins cave, with trinkets and books everywhere, along with snacks and gifts for some reason.
I can’t complain though, it's the perfect place to get everything for what I need.
“Oh, I’ve seen those on Instagram!”
I cringe, patting her on the shoulder because she is so proud of herself.
“What theme are you thinking of?” One thing I love about my parents, they’re total yes people and will help with anything; no idea too small.
“He really loves ghost movies and Scream, so maybe ghosts? I’m sure it won’t be difficult to get everything in here.
” I totally don’t think about my masked stranger, pushing the ghostface mask out of my mind because it doesn’t belong here anymore.
I’ve made my decision; all I want is Miles.
I didn’t message him about my fall and even though I've seen the notifications, I haven't wanted to see what he wants.
He hasn't shown up in the night, so I've nestled hard into the man I want, in my bed. I couldn’t care less right now about our online war to one hundred, thousand followers.
Telling myself to calm down before I bring on another headache, I pick up a basket and pass the one underneath to Mum. Nodding like she’s on a mission, we both set off in the store to locate anything we can find with a ghost related print or an actual ghost decor piece.
I lose all sense of time in the store and once we’re done, Mum demands to pay for the lot and steals credit by texting Miles that she’s got something for him.
I don’t know when they swapped numbers, but I caught him most nights updating her on how I was feeling, and generally chatting before we went to bed.
Their hotel isn’t far from university, which is handy because it means Dad can use the library for work.
After meeting with his mum, Miles is stopping by his house to pick up his reading assignment and laptop, seeing as university has resumed.
I’ve sent out the necessary emails and my professors sent over my class assignments, so I can complete them at home.
With only two more semesters to go before I graduate, it looks like studying for my final exams is all that’s left.
I’ve been here five years and it feels surreal that our dream of working on the farm is finally here.
Eating a full meal kind of makes me feel sick still, which is completely weird for me due to my usual intake, but Mum insists we stop at a small cafe before heading back. We both order small and I just get a juice for the sugar.
“I really like Miles, you know. He’s fantastic.”
Taking a sip of my drink, my smile turns dopey just at the mention of his name.
“He is. He’s so smart and funny. Obsessed with Halloween, so it’s been really fun giving in and going to all the activities with him.
” Even though I’ve lived here the entire time for uni, I didn’t know about half the events the city hosts this entire month.
We’re creeping closer to Halloween and I’ve bought us tickets for an outdoor cinema experience in the gallery gardens.
It’s a surprise to thank him for being here for me.
I’ve probably not been the best company, sleeping or grunting in pain over my shoulder every time I move, but he hasn’t complained once.
He’s doted on me each hour of the day, cuddling me close and planted kisses all over my body.
We showered together to help monitor my stitches, ate the little dinner I could manage with my friends and I made him read to me the other night as he went over his book for class. It’s been a dream.
“You really like him. I’ve never seen you like this before.
” It’s not a question, and I sigh happily again.
I’d opened up to Miles about Mum's job and the conversations I didn’t want to ever have.
I still don’t, but I also think I need to say something so that she knows I always did appreciate being able to speak to her.
“I think I have always been open to dating men…being attracted like that to anyone is hard for me.” I fiddle with the thick plaster I now have over my knuckles, flicking the edge that's starting to peel.
Mum takes a drink of her coffee, before crossing her legs to lean back in her chair. “Would it make you more comfortable to label yourself?”
I shake my head. “I don’t need to. I’m perfectly happy, more so than I ever have been with anyone else. It doesn’t diminish my feelings for women or Grace, but it wasn’t even a tenth of what I already feel with him.”
She nods, “You’ve made an emotional connection with him very quickly.”
“Yeah, I have. Is that…normal?”
Mum spent years studying sexuality, even having her work published. It feels completely cringe to speak to my own mother about this, but whilst I know I don’t need or want a label, I just want to hear once that following my heart isn’t steering me wrong.
“Completely, honey. Some relationships with others, friendship or not, just spark and there's no time limits on these things. Look at you, Harris and Em–you all became each other's person from the first day of preschool. It’s not for me to tell you which gender you’re more suited to or how your sexuality should fall, that’s personal for you to understand.
You owe no one, as long as you’re on the same page with Miles, that is all that matters.
If he kept all his attributes but identified as a woman, I think this type of relationship would remain exactly the same.
” She says the last words carefully, solidifying a theory about myself I’d thought about non-stop, maybe for years.
Whilst it may be easier to come out as Bi if I wanted to, I know deep down that isn’t correct for myself.
Demi does tick a lot of boxes, whilst not hitting them all at the same time.
Sensing my inner turmoil, Mum leans over the table and squeezes my hand that's been gripping my juice. “All that matters is that you’re happy, Casper.”
“I am.” I reply, voice tight.
“Good. He’s going to love the boo basket I got for him.”
Scoffing, I realise she’s goading me into a different conversation, when she smirks at me and starts to list off everything sitting in the bag that she picked out.
Mum has excellent taste and whilst I did want some of the stuff to be cheesy, she actually found some decor bits that he could keep out all year round.
Miles has a bookcase in his bedroom which seems like a personal shrine to Autumn, so I have no doubts this will be the best gift ever.
“Love you Mum.” I tell her, squeezing her hand before letting go.
“Love you, always.”