Chapter 16 #3
The next hours passed in something of a daze for Cilly, who was far too consumed with the enormity of the night ahead to relax and enjoy herself.
She ate but did not taste the splendid wedding breakfast. She drank, but the bubbles in the champagne did not go to her head.
Throughout it all she laughed and smiled and engaged in conversations that she could never again recall.
Her every attention was focused upon Damian, and so she was rivetingly aware of his growing tension as the day slipped away and the moment for them to leave was upon them.
Cilly excused herself to change out of the beautiful gown she had married in and into a carriage dress, though it seemed a lot of fuss and bother to make the short journey to The Mermaid.
They would stay there for a few days and then return to the hall until they had found somewhere to rent or buy.
Gee-Gee had been extremely generous and given them a suite of rooms which were apart from the family, so they might have a little privacy at least. She knew Damian was not happy about it, but he had accepted the arrangement without argument.
Cilly wondered if he believed the proximity of other people might make things easier on them both.
He clearly found their growing intimacy a challenge.
Hetty gave her an encouraging smile as Cilly made her way down the stairs, rushing forward to take her hands.
“Another beautiful new gown. You will certainly be the most stylish woman of the ton if your husband has his way,” she said with a laugh, though Cilly could hear the forced cheer and knew Hetty was almost as anxious about the coming wedding night as she was.
“And if he messes this up, I will—” she began, her voice a heated whisper, but Cilly pressed a finger to her lips.
“I’m a married lady now, Hetty, and I am no fool. I once asked you to allow me to arrange my own future as I saw fit. Nothing has changed, but you do not know how it comforts me to know I can turn to you if I need to.”
Hetty sighed and nodded. “You are right, of course, and you know you can. Always.”
She pressed a swift kiss to Cilly’s cheek and released her, and Cilly walked towards the front door to discover Damian awaiting her.
“The carriage is ready, my lady. If you are?”
The words were a little distant, overly formal, but Cilly just nodded, smiling at him. “I am, Damian, thank you.”
There was a flurry of rather awkward activity as everyone wished them goodbye, and then the carriage door closed, and they were alone for the first time all day.
Cilly let out a breath. She glanced at Damian, whose expression was stoic, like one facing an execution.
“Well, that went well, I think. Reverend Honeywell’s service was lovely, wasn’t it? Very personal.”
“It went very well, yes,” Damian agreed, though she did not believe he was attending her. His thoughts were elsewhere, and she had a fairly good notion where.
“I am all eagerness to see our rooms at The Mermaid. I have heard how elegant and comfortable they are. If they are as splendid as the ices, I shall never wish to leave.”
He frowned, apparently forcing his mind back to the conversation. “Ices? Oh, yes, I ordered some for you. I had forgotten that. Hopefully, they have not.”
Cilly blinked. “You ordered ices? For me? For tonight?”
He shrugged and looked out of the window. “Champagne and ices, yes. I thought you… well, I did not wish for every aspect of your wedding night to be a—”
“If you say disappointment, I shall strike you.”
Damian’s head whipped around and he stared at her in surprise before letting out a soft laugh. “Gideon told me you’ve a spine of steel. Not that I needed telling, it was obvious from the start.”
Cilly put up her chin. “Quite so. That being the case, I would prefer it if you did not face our wedding night with the air of a man about to climb the steps of the scaffold. I am not vain, Damian, but a woman has her pride, and when her new husband regards the wedding night in the same light as having a tooth pulled—”
“Celia!” Damian reached over and grasped her hand, clasping it between his. “Dammit, Celia, you know very well that’s not the problem.”
She let out a sigh and squeezed his hand in return.
“Yes, I know, and I understand your misgivings. If you do not wish to bed me, I shall not weep and enact a Cheltenham tragedy, I promise you. However, must you look so wretched and go talking about disappointing me? We shall find a way forward together, however that may be, but let me warn you now, Damian, if you have the idiocy to run away, believe that I will hunt you down.”
She glared at him, rather relieved when the pallid, tense look eased from his expression and his mouth twitched into a smile.
“Into the very jaws of hell, hmmm?”
“If necessary,” she said, putting up her chin. “Now, help me out of this carriage. I want my champagne and ices, please.”
With a soft laugh, he stepped down and held out his hand to her, pressing a kiss to her fingers as she descended the steps.
Their eyes met and Cilly smiled. Perhaps their marriage would not be entirely conventional, they were both stubborn, and there was much in their future that might be challenging, but one way or another, they would find a way.