SUMMER
SIXTEEN
If Levi’s goal was to make an official claim on me, then he succeeded.
I can’t keep up the lie. Whether I lose him to his family or not, this isn’t fair to either of us.
Because for the hour after Levi leaves, my mind won’t stop replaying the kiss, his touch—and every single interaction between us for years. Every laugh when his attention lingered a beat longer than normal. Every touch that had others inquiring if we were a couple.
The fact that he, as Hunter, recommended healing my trauma with Levi. What I took as him being a supportive friend was always more—and fucking him as Hunter is because Levi wanted to.
While I’m wrapped up in memories, my phone vibrates with his gamer tag.
Lunar_Warden
Sorry, Sunshine. I can’t come around tonight. One of the conditions of coming out here last minute was being available for virtual support in my job.
A lie to maintain the others, because we both know what he’s actually doing.
Everything with Hunter was designed to be temporary, but in many ways, he proved what’s right in front of me. Hunter wasn’t only the parts of Levi that could be mine.
He is Levi, and I can’t have one without the other.
He’s my best friend and first love. He’s the person I’ve wanted for so long but convinced myself I could be without, for the sake of his family and future.
I have to tell him.
This must end. Whether or not he wants me, he’ll need to understand his parents will never accept me. So that kiss, the sex…it’s a fantasy world that ends when the bubble of this vacation pops.
The thought scoops out my insides and buries them in the sand outside, but he’s a Westwood. How can I compete with that?
Me
That’s okay. I’m pretty tired anyway. It was a long day.
Lunar_Warden
Sleep tight. Envision me beside you, then imagine me licking that pretty little pussy of yours until you scream my name so the whole resort can hear. Goodnight, Summer.
I rest the phone on my chest, screen down as the dark room fills me with dread.
Levi might be watching the cabana, but even he can’t keep away the memories.
For the next day and a half, everyone is on edge.
For all his words, Levi full-on ignores me.
My texts get one or two responses. He’s frequently gone, though somehow, he’s always around too.
If he can’t be near me, he all but forces me by the main pool or in restaurants, where his staff not-so-subtly watches me and reports to him.
It’s annoying, since hiding beneath my blankets, inside the cabana with the blinds shut, would be preferable.
Experiencing a vacation is impossible when my skin is constantly electrocuted. It feels like I’ve lost Levi, although the unselfish parts of me understand he’s doing this for me.
Neither of us mention the kiss, which is telling. He regrets it. We fell into the trap plenty of male-female friendships do when they test things. We tried, it failed, it fell apart by an action that shouldn’t have happened.
The fact lessens my feelings about it.
I still have Hunter until the end of vacation, and that’ll have to end too. Levi can’t have parts of me when he wants me—as different people, though it’s the meagre I’d accept. Still, he can’t. This doesn’t have a happy ending for us.
If he regrets the kiss, then surely, he regrets everything else? Maybe he’s taking the character of Hunter way too seriously.
I spend the majority of my day convincing myself everything is fine while watching the buildings, searching for signs of Levi and my father.
After Levi’s text that instructs me to go ahead for supper alone, I return to my cabana. Pausing on the porch, I study his, which is noticeably dark. What would he think if he found me passed out in bed, swathed in his scent?
Probably not my best idea, given everything.
My feet instead take me back to the sand and beach.
The seagulls above head squawk, begging me to follow.
Maybe if I keep walking, I’ll outpace the troubled emotions, but the mounting dread of being alone in the dark, in the open, where Dad can easily stumble upon me, sends me racing through my cabana’s front door.
At least here, there’s a lock to keep him out.
After checking the backdoor, then the main one again, ensuring both are sealed, I flip the blinds shut and head into the bathroom. There, I shut the door, pressing my back against it until my breath evens out.
I have to trust Levi and the police will find him, but the fact that he’s in the resort somewhere and they haven’t makes little sense. How many places are there for a person to hide?
Stripping out of my dress, I twist the shower knobs until the room’s air conditioner is countered by the blistering steam of the shower before stepping beneath the water. It pounds heavy on my hair, drenching me until I fall to my knees and lose myself to my thoughts.
My nails imbed into my old scars as my gaze flits to my razor resting on the side of the tub. If I bleed, the fear of my father bleeds with it. In here, both will slide down the drain, never to be seen again. It’d be so easy, though Levi would be disappointed.
He isn’t here.
He’ll come back and see the fresh lines. He’ll know.
He’d have to pay attention for longer than thirty seconds.
My hands press into my temples, trying to push the voice out. It’s toxic, turning me against Levi and even myself. It can’t win.
My nails dig harder, tracing one of my oldest scars. It’s always been here for me when no one else was and deserves a friend.
I reach for the razor, fingers wrapping the handle to separate the two. It’s been a while since I’ve done this. Too long…
For good reason.
Levi. Hunter. But no one more important than myself.
Dad won’t win.
Dad can’t win.
My fingers uncurl from the plastic.
I stand, reaching for my shampoo bottle instead. Suddenly, the shower has lost all my interest, so the quicker I finish washing, the quicker I can escape the thoughts that nearly destroyed me.
As I finish rinsing my hair, a cool burst of air seeps from behind the curtain at the same time a large hand spans my back and shoves me into the tile. The chill is immediately filled by the body pressing into me.
He found me.
But he won’t win.
I claw, shoving my palms into the tile to push away, but he forces me back and kicks my legs apart. My hair is yanked backwards, and a low, crooning voice whispers into my ear, sending both my heart skyrocketing and slowing.
“Fight all you want, but you’re not going anywhere.”
My gamer. Hunter…Levi.
His wet jeans plaster to my ass as he presses against me. My face is pushed into the tile, and although this isn’t a real attack, I tell myself it is to see how far he’ll go.
Any doubt over Levi and the kiss from earlier is sucked down the drain by the blistering need to see this part of our trip through to the end.
I push and kick him and try to turn, only to have my arms yanked behind my back. I fight as if this is real.
“Fuck, I’ve missed you, Sunshine.”
Although I’ve missed him too, I don’t stop fighting, managing to dislodge my hands, then duck around him. He blocks me, an arm banding my waist before he spins me around.
“You fight so prettily. Too bad it’s false.”
Maybe, because I don’t actually want to hurt him.
He manages to keep me against the wall while the clink of his belt chimes louder than the water. Although, it’s a sound I’ve heard many times with him over this week, it’s another belt I’m reminded of.
Another time.
Another man.
Hunter’s hands band my waist, reminding me it’s all in my head.
It’s false. Trickery.
The head of his cock broaches my core. He yanks my arms above head, ending any escape attempts. My back arches, nipples rubbing into the tile and begging to be touched, bitten.
He sinks inside me an inch.
Dad never made it this far, but the burst of fear—of the past day since Levi admitted what’s happening—hits so fucking hard, it’s a tropical storm ripping through everything good in my week. Everything that he’s helped heal.
It’s Levi’s grip…but it’s not.
Not anymore.
“Lunar. Lunar, lunar, lunar.”
While I said it four times, he responds after the first. His cock is yanked from me, and my feet lower back to the shower floor. He backs away, turns off the water, then steps out of the shower entirely. Water drips from his clothes, the only sound in a room penetrated by my pants.
“Summer, I’m sorry.”
“It’s not you,” I whisper. He stopped. He did what I was testing—what I needed from him. Perhaps test isn’t the correct word. After all, I never doubted he’d force me, but I needed to confirm it, to claim control over the situation.
Once, I pleaded with my father to stop, questioned him, and was ignored. It took elbowing his nose hard enough that, combined with the few beers he downed, allowed me to escape to Levi’s.
“It’s not you,” I repeat, tilting my head forward to stare at the drain, which is much closer than it was when he was in me. When did I kneel?
Hunter approaches the tub, also dropping to his knees. The Xs for eyes destroys the emotion existing below, but I envision Levi’s eyes. “Summer, I… Are you okay?” His voice shifts slightly, my best friend again, though he probably doesn’t realize it.
“You stopped.”
“Of course. Did I hurt you?”
“Not at all. I just…” He knows what’s going on, yet telling him while he’s another person feels different, like I’m disclosing the truth to an outside, trusted person. “My father escaped from prison, and he’s here. Like, at the resort. And you—just…it was great, but I needed to—”
“Hey.” He cups my chin. “Don’t say more. I get it. Let’s get you into bed.”
“I’m alright now. We could finish.”
A low chuckle comes from behind the mask as he dislodges my hold and reaches for a towel hanging nearby. “The best thing we can do for you tonight is to be together. Come on. I’ll put you to bed and stick around for a bit.”
He moves through the bathroom and helps me into the towel, then leads me out of the bathroom before he heads for my suitcase. There isn’t the kind of hesitation he should have as a ‘stranger’, as if his fake persona is slipping for him too. After the kiss, he’s less interested in upholding Hunter.
Maybe he just needs a reminder to end it entirely.
“Could we take a walk down the beach? I wanted to go earlier, but being alone in the dark wasn’t smart.” It probably is still unwise, but Levi will defend me.
Within minutes, he’s leading me down the stretch of the beach and away from the cabanas. Sand kicks up with our steps, forming a path. The moon is almost full above, an anchor between us. We walk in silence, each lost in thought.
All I know is the deception on both our parts must end.