9. Chapter Nine #2
One morning, I wait a very long time for her, and she doesn’t come.
I walk toward the way she always comes from and stop when I reach the farthest we’ve ever gone together.
The dirt path turns to stone, and there are buildings.
I’ve never seen any up close, but I know what the pieces are called.
They each have windows and doors. They vary in color from blues to reds to simple browns.
The sun has moved too far over, and my stomach squeezes several times when I wonder where Evelia is.
“What is that?” A boy holding a red ball elbows another.
The other gapes and takes several steps back. “I’m not sure. Maybe a demon, like what the priest warns us about.”
Both boys shout and run toward the village, and I think about running.
Something could be wrong with Evelia, so I keep going.
There are more people than I have ever seen before, and they are doing strange things like hitting wood until it splits or pulling animals by rope.
Everyone stops their tasks and stares. Some scream and run back into the buildings.
I freeze and tremble, looking around for somewhere to hide, but people are on all sides of me.
A bunch of men charge me, and my back slams onto the ground.
Evelia told me never to hurt people, so I try to get away.
They punch me and hold me down. Sharp pain pulses against my chest when I can’t break free.
They plunge metal into me, and it’s agony.
“Stop!” I scream and scream, but no one stops.
They stab me again and again, and I can’t take it anymore, so I try to make myself smaller.
They throw small white dust at me that burns.
It burns so deep I’m sure it’s devouring me.
They drag me over the stone ground and tie me to a post before lighting it on fire, but fire I understand.
It lives inside me much hotter than the flames they create.
“What are you doing to him? Don’t hurt him! Please! He’s good! Stop!”
My head snaps up at my favorite voice, and they are holding her back.
Evelia is trying to jump into the fire to reach me.
Fire will hurt her. My pain ceases the moment someone pushes her to the ground, and something fierce replaces it.
I take hold of the inferno around me and send it into everyone close but her.
The ropes around me are ashes, and I jump down, holding the flames in my palms. All those left rush to their houses.
Evelia covers her mouth at the burning people, and I shrink back, knowing I’ve broken my promise not to hurt people.
I pull the fire away from those burning, and I search for answers on how to help them.
There isn’t much I can do, but I try to send them magic, and it helps enough for them to quit writhing on the ground.
All except for the ones already charred, and I flee until I reach my rock.
I shrink behind it, heaving and crying for the first time.
Rain joins my tears as my fear and sadness grow too great to stay only inside me.
Evelia leaps at me and holds me tight. “I’m so sorry, Lazzus. I’m so sorry. I should have told you to stay out of the village.”
I can’t speak any words and only want her to hold me. She undoes her cloak and puts it over our heads. We stay in our cocoon as I can’t calm the rain as easily as I started it.
When I’m finally soothed enough, the rain stops, and she removes the drenched cloak.
I press my back into the rough rock to remind myself I’m actually still in the strange realm. “I broke my promise not to hurt people.”
“It’s okay to hurt people if they are hurting you. It’s when you hurt them just to hurt them, it’s bad.”
I meet her eyes for a second before I have to look away as an uncomfortable emotion rises in my throat and cheeks. “I didn’t hurt them because they were hurting me.”
“Why did you then? You certainly had a right to. My friend said they stabbed you a bunch and beat you before they tied you up and set you on fire. They’re sure dumb doing that to a fire fairy.
I’m happy you heal well, or hearing all that would have terrified me.
It would devastate me to lose you.” She whimpers and hugs me again.
“They were hurting you.”
She pulls back to look into my eyes. “That’s why you finally defended yourself?”
“I was defending you.”
She bites her lip, and tears slip from her eyes.
“You’re the best friend I’ve ever had.” She wipes her face with her forearm.
“You sometimes get good at looking almost human. Maybe you just need to see more people to figure out how to look like one. The problem is you’ve only seen me, but you’re a boy, right? ”
I look away as I try to understand her words. Several images flash through my mind until I piece it together. “I am male."
“We just need you to see more people than me, so you can better know how to turn into one.” She hugs me. “Are you still hurt anywhere?”
I touch my chest.
She frowns as she inspects under my shirt. “Where?”
“Inside.”
She closes her eyes, and her shoulders fall. “Me too.”
“Why did they hurt me? I was only walking.”
“Because they don’t know what you are. People get scared when they don’t know what something is. That makes them hurt it.”
I tilt my head. “I don’t understand.”
“Me neither.” She waits with me until a trumpet sounds.
“That’s my father calling me home. I forgot to tell you, I’ve started school for the year, so I can’t come out and play all day.
That’s where I was, but I’ll come here whenever I can.
Don’t go to the village again until we can work on changing you. ”
“Evelia?”
She stops walking away. “Yes.”
“I will always protect you from hurt.”
“Me too.” She leaves me to sit in a deep sadness that feels impossible to live inside.
She grabs my hand and tugs me toward the way she always arrives from. “You’re doing really well at looking more human, but I really think you need to see more. Especially boys. Here. Put this on, and they won’t be able to see you. We’ll be careful too.”
I put on the cloak and raise the hood. Returning to the village surfaces the memories of fear and pain. Evelia keeps her hand in mine and insists I need to do this. Bravery finds me with her next to me.
“We go to the village but be quiet so you can see what human boys look like for longer. That way, if you ever have to go to a village again, you can blend in and not be harmed. But when we’re alone, I want you to be whatever you want to be.”
We stay concealed behind trees and buildings, being careful to move only when no one is looking.
The villagers all walk around, doing tasks, like pulling animals around or carrying items from one building to the next.
New scents also strike my nose and are most likely sweet types of food.
We watch the other children playing. It makes it easier for me to change how I look.
When we make it back to my rock, I pull my hood down. “What do you think?”
Evelia claps her hands. “You did it! Now you can go into the village safely.”
She’s so happy that I decide I will stay that exact way for her.
There are times Evelia can’t come all day, and I miss her. That’s a strange feeling that hits in my stomach. It’s unsettling and leaves me antsy. It’s only in summers that she can spend all her time with me until dark.
As the sky changes again and again, Evelia looks different, so I shift my appearance to match the ages she claims we are.
Going into the village helps me understand how the other children grow up, and even though I look fully human, I never go too far in.
Any time a person besides Evelia steps by me, I shrink back and have to take deep breaths the way she taught me.
Evelia teaches me many things, like reading and sewing colorful pictures onto cloth. She leaves me several cross-stitch projects to work on when she's gone, and I give them to her as presents when I finish each one. She says we are sixteen and will be grown soon.
Every moment spent with her brings a pleasant warmth through my body, and every time she is close, I feel things I can’t explain. Things that move me closer to her touch, and the desire to return her touch burns like the fire in my veins.
She sits on my rock with me and stares south. It’s a direction she never talks about. “Do you know what’s beyond the mountains, Lazzus?”
I tear my eyes from the sky where her favorite little birds soar. She loves them for their blue feathers and red bellies. There’s a trick I’ve been practicing that I want to show her soon. “What is beyond the mountains?”
“The ocean. My father has never let me go there, but I so want to see it more than in paintings and books. It seems like it would be the most beautiful thing.”
“You’re the most beautiful thing.”
Her freckled cheeks turn a concerning red. “You wouldn’t say that if you saw the ocean.”
“Someday we will go there, and I will prove you wrong.”
She leans her head on my shoulder. “Deal.”
“It’s a promise more than a deal. Deals are broken and promises can’t be.”
She rubs her arms, and I heat my body just enough to warm her up. “Some people break promises. I know I told you that the day we first met, but we’re not children anymore. We’re old enough to know that sometimes people break promises.”
“Not me to you. Not ever. They will have to end me before I break a promise to you, Evelia.”
“I’d rather you break a promise than end.” She reaches over and takes my hand.
She brings life to me with the smallest things, and it’s strong and more powerful than the flames I bury to keep her safe. It’s something that should have a name, but neither Evelia nor the collective have told me what it would be.
Evelia runs toward me, waving the note I sent her. “You sent this by bluebird. How?”