Chapter 7 #2
I don’t deny the relief I feel, the simple joy of knowing he’s alive. But I haven’t forgotten what Peter said about my mother. I realize Peter has been poisoning my mind ever since we first met, but that part has stuck with me. A thorn in my paw that I can’t remove. Only one person can.
“Go ahead and ask me.” Hook stares into my eyes. “I can hear all that machinery clanking in there, lass.”
Tiger Lily and the others are still walking along with us, escorting us back to the Jolly Roger. More pirates join, and I realize Hook brought the entire crew with him. For me. He brought the entire force of his pirate army to bear because he was trying to get to me.
“Do you want me to rut you in front of all these Guardians, lass? Is that your cup of tea? Because I will if you keep eye-fucking me like that.”
Starkey snickers, and Widow elbows him as they trail behind us.
“Stop threatening me with a good time.” I’m stalling.
I have to ask him, but do I want to know the answer?
If it’s bad, then maybe I don’t. Because …
Because I’ve fallen in love with this villain, this man of myth who is anything but one-dimensional.
He has more facets than one of his stolen jewels, and I want to see every one of them—those that shine and those that don’t.
He jumps down a short drop, and I yelp and grab onto him more tightly.
“I’ve got you, lass. Don’t you worry.” He keeps going, trudging through the forest like he’d know the path to the sea even if he were blindfolded.
“What Peter said,” I start haltingly. “What he said about my mother?” I look into his eyes and imagine I’ll know if he’s telling the truth or lying.
Or maybe it’s not my imagination. Maybe I can read him.
Maybe my heart knows his so well that a lie would make a hollow-sounding beat instead of the constant snare that rat-a-tats through me whenever he’s near.
“Is that your question, lass?”
“Don’t make it harder than it has to be,” I scold.
“Oh, it’s already plenty hard.”
Tiger Lily clears her throat. “Guardians, fan out. They could still be hiding in the trees. If you see a Lost Boy, you know what must be done.”
Several of the Guardians break off from our main group and disappear into the thickets and behind the thick trunks that mark this section of the island. The fantastical flowers bloom here, their petals reaching for the elusive moon.
I try to steel myself as best I can, but I know I’m one wrong word away from crumbling. “Did you … did you visit her?”
“Yes.” His answer makes a yawning pit open in my stomach, a swirling black hole that threatens to turn me inside out and swallow me whole. My mouth goes dry, my hands sweaty.
“Did you drive her mad?”
He sighs. “I don’t think so, no. But how can I be sure?”
A reprieve, one that saves me from falling apart … for now. “Tell me what happened.”
He glances at Tiger Lily. “I suppose you may as well hear it all now.”
“Finally,” she says tartly.
“I went to the heart of the island. In the cave beneath the tree, I heard the island speak to me. It offered me a wish.”
One of the Guardians behind us hisses.
Hook continues, unperturbed. “I took it.” His gaze softens as he meets my eyes again.
Sure-footed as a goat, he carries me down a rocky hill toward the beach below.
“When Wendy came to the island, she worked some sort of curse on me. On everyone here, really. She made me realize there could be more. More than a life of murder and thievery—” He grins.
“Though those are still plenty appealing.”
I smack his shoulder.
“Wendy was like the first drink of alcohol for a young lad. The first taste of something forbidden. She made me want something I’d never even considered.” He jumps down another bit of the incline. “She made me want love. Connection. Someone to share my cabin with.”
“You wanted Wendy?” I ask.
“That mealy-mouthed goodie two-shoes?” His lip curls in disgust. “I wanted her to walk my plank and be gone.”
“Jeez. That’s my great-great-great-grandmother you’re insulting!” There might be one more or one less ‘great’ in there, but I can’t remember.
“My father was a piss-poor excuse for a man. There, feel better?” He reaches the sand, his steps growing smoother.
“She made me want the other half of my soul. I didn’t even realize it was missing, but like I said, she cursed me.
That’s what drove me to the heart of the island. It’s what led me to you.”
“And you’re saying that was a curse?” I scoff.
“Of sorts, yes. Just think, lass. I was Captain James Hook, feared by all, even by Blackbeard. I maimed half of Atlantis and had an astronomical bounty on my head in the Triangle. I had it all.” He gives me a rueful smile.
“Until Wendy made me realize I didn’t have it all.
And I wouldn’t have it all until I had you, lass. ”
I’m so close to melting, but I can’t. Not until he tells me the truth. “I have to know if you hurt her.” My voice is barely a whisper, like a faint harmony with the waves of the sea.
He nods. “I know, lass. That’s the part I’ve been dreading, been trying to figure out.
Once the island granted my request, it told me your name.
Needless to say, I went running back to my ship and set sail to find the woman who would make me whole.
I found you.” He shakes his head. “You were six. Playing in your pool with your mother and a little yipping dog running around and trying to jump in with you.”
“Nana.” God, it’s been a long time since I’ve thought about her. She died when I was still little.
“I’d come to claim you. But you were yet a wee lass. So, I left you alone. Only visiting and checking in on you from afar. Eventually, I tasked one of my men with looking out for you.”
I arch a brow. “Yeah, I know. Not cool.”
“Shortly after that, I met your mother.”
A knot forms in my throat. “How?”
“She came to me. We were sailing around the Neverstorm, and she dropped right onto the deck, her clothes and hair soaking wet. She strode right up to me, put her finger in my face, and asked me what my intentions were with you.” He smiles a little as if it’s a fond memory.
“She was here?” I’m so damn tired of crying, but I can’t stop. Not when I imagine my mother in Neverland. “My mom was here?”
“Off and on for years.” He nods. “Not just here, though, she traveled all the worlds. I even heard tell of her swimming to the darkest depths and meeting the old god who lives at the bottom of the sea. She had a magic of her own, one borne from Neverland. A particular sort of fairy folk, she was. No control over when she appeared, mind you. She complained mightily about it. In between all that, I asked her about you. She told me all sorts of things, and most of all, she told me how much she loved you.”
A sob catches in my throat.
He reaches up and wipes my tears away. “She told me you would hum to yourself while doing homework, you loved every cat you ever met—even the one that left this scar—” He lifts my hand and shows me the little check-marked scar on my wrist, then kisses it.
“You had the messiest room she’d ever seen, but you always knew exactly where everything was.
You had dozens of notebooks, all of them filled with stories.
She would often say you had more stories than time to tell them. ”
It’s all true. She told him about me. She remembered me. I can’t talk. No words form as I try to process what he’s saying. My mother traveled? That’s where she was when she left? And she told him she loved me?
“She didn’t even have to say she loved you, lass. She threatened to cut off my bollocks if I ever hurt you.” He laughs. “She was nothing like Wendy, thank the saints.”
“You didn’t make her leave me.” I cry and bury my face in the crook of his neck. “Y-you didn’t make her leave. Peter lied.”