27. Aria
27
ARIA
T ito's sweat-slicked body rolls off mine onto the bare mattress, the sheets tangled at the foot of the bed from the wild romp we just had. His sex drains from me, soiling the bed beneath me and reminding me that I'm his—the child inside me, too. He's panting for air like me, and neither of us speaks. I lie there staring at the ceiling thinking of the mess I've made and how things are going behind the scenes where I cannot look.
I haven't heard from Peter, but I cling to hope that he will keep his word. I don't even know how much pull he has in his family right now, but if he can give me what I asked for, it'll be enough to set things right. Though, it may never make things between Tito and me the way they should be in a trusting partnership or marriage.
"I'm going to shower," Tito says, pushing off the bed. It jostles as he stands and heads toward the bathroom, turning over his shoulder to say, "You want to join me?"
"Not tonight…" I turn my back to him as the thoughts continue to pummel me. I've spent the past month trying to make Tito seem inadequate to his father along with Carlos's help. I don't know if Carlos's attitude and temperament turned on me because I withdrew and had second thoughts or if it's because he's a monster in disguise.
Our plan was to discredit Tito, but I'm afraid Carlos has done something darker and more sinister than I ever had in mind. Peter will confirm this for me, but my suspicion is that he's employed the help of someone inside the Uhkov family, someone who knows exactly what to do to make Tito a non-threat to Carlos's plot to become the new leader. The thought makes me shudder with fear.
The Russians may be regrouping right now, but their next strike could come at any time, in any place. I hardly think they will attack Tito's residence, but anything is possible. I fear that in encouraging Carlos to resist Tito's leadership and undermine him, I've created a monster who won't be satisfied with just the authority and title of Don of the Ramiro Family. The insatiable hunger for power and money sinks its teeth into victims, and Carlos may have already succumbed to it. An alliance with the Uhkovs would be devastating, sucking my family into a web of deceit and treachery.
I hear the water turn on and Tito humming to himself. I'm tempted to join him if for no other reason than to feel the physical comfort of his hands washing my body clean, but I have no energy to move. I'm hiding so many secrets, I don't know which one is the heaviest. I'm weighed down, paralyzed by the circumstance and the grief. I still miss Jasper, but I haven't even had time to grieve him properly yet. Not with everything falling apart around me.
When my phone rings, it startles me. It's late, too late to have a phone call. Anyone who calls this time of day has something important to say. I push myself up and look at the screen—a blocked caller. It means only one thing. Peter has news for me.
I steal a glance at the bathroom door, still ajar with steam rolling out. Tito is still happily humming, occupied for the moment, so I take the call. My thumb slides across the screen to answer, and I hold it to my ear.
"Yes…" My simple greeting is both for my protection and his. If anyone is listening to either end of this call, they can't ever hear any personally identifying words. I wait with bated breath as the line crackles in the silence for a moment.
"Kitten… I have news." Peter's voice is thick with emotion. He never stopped loving me, though I have clearly moved on.
"Go on," I tell him, not willing to even risk the impression that I'm moved by that. If Tito heard that, he'd be furious. I don't know how he'd react.
"Jasper was murdered by someone very close to your husband, Kitten. The man himself probably gave the order." The first thing I wanted to know, which I feared I already knew, is confirmed. I don't know why rage wells up inside me.
I knew this, right? That Tito probably ordered the hit that killed Jasper… I knew it and I blamed myself—blame myself. It never would have happened if I hadn't messed with things, but Jasper is dead and now it's confirmed my husband is guilty, caught red-handed.
"Thank you."
"There's more." Peter has several tasks from me. One of them is to make sure his people stay away from my family. The Peraltas are not responsible for this feud, and I don't want them involved. The next thing Peter has to do is get proof of Carlos's anarchy and deliver it to me or Tito, maybe even in front of his father.
"Go on," I repeat, glancing at the door. The shower water is off now, door still ajar. Tito isn't humming, but he isn't out here yet. I sit up, legs dangling over the bed. I'm so angry I am shaking, but I have to know what else.
"Your family… I can't do much. They willingly entered this fight, and my brother will do what's needed to maintain integrity. I'm sorry. It's out of my hands." Peter clears his throat. "But I have what you asked for and I will send it to you soon. Ramiro's brother has been working with mine. I don't know all the details, but I'll get them."
"Thank you so much." I want to speak his name, a gratitude from me to him, but to do so would be to put us both at risk.
"Speak nothing of it. And if you find yourself alone, Kitten, then come to me." His invitation is comforting, but it doesn't move my heart. I am in love with the man I forced myself to marry now, for good or for bad, in peace or at war.
"I will." My promise comes just as Tito rejoins me in the bedroom.
"Who was that?" he asks, using a towel to dry his hair. His naked body has droplets of water across it, scars and tattoos bared for my eyes. He's a work of art, but I'm so hurt I don't know where to begin. I need a buffer, some time to put this rage back inside the box Peter just opened and lock it away.
I know Tito had my brother killed and I know it was my fault, but my anger isn't directed at myself anymore. That's how I swallowed it before. That's how I was able to push it away and not feel it. But now, I can't help but feel it. The wound is reopened and fresh, and he's standing right in front of me.
"My source…" I'm not lying, though I won't tell him who, or that we were once lovers.
"And?" he asks, walking toward me.
"And he told me you ordered the hit that killed my brother." I can't look at him. Tears burn my eyes as I set the phone on the nightstand and rise. I want to run out of this house and find peace and solace somewhere else, with my family, maybe, but Tito is my family now.
"Aria…" he starts, but I am livid.
"No!" I shout, an eruption so fast and so loud he jumps. Then his eyes darken as he opens his mouth to speak, but I rush at him with fists ready. I pummel his chest hard, screaming, "I hate you! I hate your family! I hate your business! I hate this marriage! I hate you!"
All the grief of the past several months is too much for me to control. My hands hammer against his firm body until he grabs my wrists and pins them against my chest.
"Stop it!" he shouts, but I'm relentless.
"You are a monster!" The accusation wells up, and I spit it at him, but I know it's meant for me. I am the monster. I am the one to blame, but I don't know how to express that.
"Aria, knock it off," he booms, and I try to wrestle away from him, but he shoves me hard and I land on the bed. "This is business and I had no clue who snitched on us until the hit was done. I sent my men to take care of a problem and they did as they were told, and?—"
"And you stole my brother from me," I sob.
The bed shakes again as he sits down and lays a hand on my hip. "I didn't know, Aria. I only found out when it was done. I had no way of knowing it was Jasper."
"Don't say his name!" I scream as I curl into a ball. "Don't you ever fucking say his name again." The pain I'm feeling is too deep, pushed so far into my gut I hoped I'd never feel it again. I know now what my mother has been feeling, my father too. I've compartmentalized it away so I could function, and it's all rising to the surface, threatening to drive me mad with anger.
For once Tito is silent, hand still resting on my hip. I know it wasn't personal, that he didn’t love me back then the way he does now. And I believe him when he says he didn't know who it was until it was too late. Things like this aren't supposed to happen, though. The agreement was meant to protect us both, but I breached it first. I leaked the information that got Jasper killed, and I can't blame my husband for his reaction. I knew what sort of game I was playing.
My phone rings, but I ignore it. I'm in no shape to speak to anyone right now. And if it's Peter, he will get the point and not call back again tonight. But Tito doesn't think like me. He reaches for my phone and answers.
"Hello… Yes…. Oh, hello… Is everything okay?" My heart claws at my rib cage, a wounded animal seeking refuge from the pain. "I understand. Yes, I agree. That's not good. We'll be there in twenty minutes."
"What?" I ask, sitting up. My naked body feels very exposed to him now, the vulnerability of our sex juxtaposed next to my rage for the man seated in front of me. "Who was it?" I ask, now trembling.
"It was your parents' security team. There's been an attack." He doesn't explain much as he stands and walks to his dresser with determination.
"Attack? What attack?" I ask, the fear now overwhelming my anger. "What happened? Are they okay?" More tears come now, but not from rage. I rush to the dresser and pull out clean clothes, dressing in tandem next to the man I simultaneously loathe and love.
"I don't know," he growls as he steps into his boxers. "A bomb. We have to go there. I need time to get my men ready." And then Tito is gone, taking my phone with him. He carries his clothes as I scurry to dress. My mind is racing with terrifying images flashing through it.
My God, what have I started? Dear God… Protect my parents.