34. Jules
THIRTY-FOUR
JULES
I wake up with Drew next to me and a giddy feeling inside my chest. For a moment, I watch him sleep.
His lashes cast shadows under his eyes. His bottom lip pokes out slightly more than the top.
I’ve woken up next to him before, but this is the first time I’m allowing myself to look and admire.
The first time I can freely admit that I want him.
With that, our conversation from last night comes back to me. It’s probably the first time I’ve felt truly safe in a relationship. Which isn’t to say I’ve never felt safe. I’ve just kept myself at a distance from my ex’s because my fear never allowed me to trust them completely.
I realize I have to ruin the afterglow of our kiss by telling Drew everything.
I’ve never had to have this conversation before.
Briefly, I consider having him join me for a session with Dr. Kim and doing it then.
I reject the idea instantly. While it sounds great in theory and will probably be for the best, I don’t want to have an audience for the conversation, especially one that’s going to monitor my feelings.
If it’s going to be messy, I want it to be messy.
I slide out of bed softly. Rushing to the bathroom, I quickly pee and brush my teeth.
When I come out, I see Bailey is already awake and I quietly usher her out of the room and down the stairs. Letting her out in the backyard, I stand on deck, breathing in the early morning air and shivering slightly.
It’s gotten cold so quickly.
“Hey.”
I turn around to see Drew stepping onto the deck, his hair messy from sleep. He bends down, kissing the side of my neck in greeting and I barely hold back my moan. I feel that kiss to the bottom of my feet.
“You woke up early,” he says, voice still scratchy from sleep. It does something to me, that voice.
“I was watching you sleep,” I say. Better to admit the crazy before the first date.
“Hmm, see something you like?” His eyes are heavy with sleep and the way he looks at me, like he can’t see anything else, makes me feel like I’m about to spin off into the stratosphere.
“You’re pretty hot for a hockey player,” I say.
“Catching strays so early in the morning,” he says.
“I don’t want you to feel comfortable now that we’re this.” I wave a hand between us.
He wraps his arms around me, pulling me in closer against him. The only thing that can make this better is if he was shirtless.
“You mean now that you’re my girlfriend,” he says.
“You’re asking me to be your girlfriend after one kiss?” I ask.
“I don’t believe in delaying the inevitable.” He squeezes me closer, bending down to kiss my neck again. I tilt my head back to give him better access.
“What if I say no?” I ask, practically moaning. He kisses the spot under my ear which makes my eyes roll back into my head.
“I’ll ask nicely,” he whispers in my ear.
“Will you be a good boy and say please?” I tease.
“Didn’t I do it last night?” He straightens, his eyes dancing with mirth.
“I was very pleased with that,” I admit.
“Pleasing you is my utmost priority.” His eyes drop down to my mouth.
“I like that quality in a man,” I whisper.
Drew lowers his head to kiss me and Bailey starts barking, making us both laugh. We turn as she runs up the steps jumping up to hug Drew.
“Good morning, Bailey girl.” Drew hugs her back and then she comes to me, her front paws resting on my shoulders. I hug her back, burying my face in her soft fur.
“I love you,” I coo.
I’m glad I don’t have to leave because I’d miss her so much. But I should because living with my boyfriend type person before we’re even in a proper relationship will surely be disastrous.
I’m a little amazed to admit this, but I’ve never noticed just how hot Drew is. With his thick arms and thicker thighs, with the way he takes up so much space but never makes me feel like I can’t breathe because he’s taking up too much space.
We’re supposed to be watching Psycho and here I am, too distracted by him. I’m sitting tucked into the corner of the couch, my feet resting on his thighs. His hand is resting on my feet, warmth seeping through into my bones.
I can’t stop looking at him. In those blue jeans and white t-shirt that’s stretched across his body and those slutty little glasses with his hair a mess. He’s not even doing anything other than existing and I want to climb all over him.
I’ve never wanted to be touched so badly before.
“Are you okay, baby?” He looks at me, green eyes shining behind his glasses.
Is it possible for a person to be in heat? I’ll have to look it up. It’s more than just ovulation and it’s not the correct time in my cycle for that.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I say. I twist, my feet shifting closer to the hem of his t-shirt. Maybe I can slide it up just a little and give myself a show?
“You’re not scared, are you?” he asks.
“Nope.”
I’m moving across the couch and straddling his lap before he can ask another question.
Fisting my hand in the back of his hair, I tilt his head back.
There’s a moment where I catch his smirk and the look of satisfaction in his eyes, like he was waiting for me to do exactly this.
Then my mouth descends on his and all thought leaves my mind.
Drew’s hands splay over my ass, pulling me closer to him. I’m wearing thin cotton shorts and the ridge of his cock presses against my aching center.
Our mouths move hungrily, desperately, and I touch Drew everywhere I can. He groans into my mouth, his hips thrusting up. I can’t stop myself from rocking my hips forward, from riding him with abandon.
“You always taste so sweet,” Drew murmurs against my lips.
My cheeks heat as I let my fingers trail down his body, to the hem of his t-shirt.
I let them linger there while I trail my mouth along his jaw to his neck, sucking on the skin beneath his ear.
Drew grips the back of my head, moaning softly as I run my tongue over the bruise. I sit back to admire my work.
“Satisfied?” Drew asks, smirking.
“You do look better with it,” I reply.
Reaching for his shirt, he pulls it over his head in one quick motion. My eyes trail all over the large expanse of his chest. The pectorals and the abs, the smattering of hair, how solid he is. He’s so perfect and beautiful, his body carved from marble.
“Blank canvas, baby. For you to do with as you please,” Drew says.
My eyes flick up to his. Behind me, bloody murder is going on but I can’t care less. Psycho is the least sexiest movie to make out to, and here I am, burning for this man.
My hand hovers over his chest, too afraid to touch him. When I do, there’s no going back.
“You can touch me. I’m all yours.”
I look into his eyes, the desperation there for me to touch him. It’s a desperation I recognize well. I place my hand on his chest, right over his heart, and Drew draws in a shuddering breath. His skin is hot to the touch.
“What should I do with you, then? Since you’re all mine,” I say.
“Whatever you want,” he replies.
I kiss him again, deeper and harder, letting my hands trail over his body. I jump slightly when he slides a finger under my top and he pulls away from the kiss, our breaths mingling. The room is darkened except for one lamp and the lights coming off the tv.
“Can I?” Drew asks.
I nod hesitantly, trying to calm my fear. I want him to touch me desperately, more than I want to let my fear win.
Drew doesn’t immediately remove my top. He grazes my waist, his finger moving up and down soothingly. “You know I’ll never do anything to hurt you, right? And we’ll never do anything you’re not ready for.”
I already knew that, but he has no idea how much I appreciate the reminder in this moment. That he doesn’t automatically assume my consent is overarching and allows him to do anything.
I kiss the corner of his mouth softly. “I know.”
His eyes shift back and forth between mine, expecting me to change my mind.
I wrap my hands around his, pulling my top over my head and throwing it aside.
I’m wearing a dark green lacy bra that hugs my girls perfectly.
The way Drew’s eyes drop down to my breasts and he licks his lips tells me I’ve chosen well.
I’ve caught him looking a few times before, just a flick here and there, and always assumed it was wishful thinking on my part. The way he’s looking at them right now tells me I wasn’t hopelessly wishing for something that was never going to happen.
Reaching behind me, I unhook my bra and pull it off, tossing it in the same direction as my top.
Drew fucking whimpers at the sight of my bare breasts, nipples pebbled and aching.
“You really like them, don’t you?” I ask, amused.
“I’m fucking obsessed, baby.” His heated eyes move up to mine. “With them, and with the rest of you. With your smile, and your mind, and your wicked mouth. You’re so stunningly beautiful.”
I blush with his praise. I kiss him again and we both whimper as our bare chests press together.
With a groan, he grabs my breasts and I feel the touch right in my center, my pussy clenching.
He’s rock hard under me and I can’t stop myself from rocking my hips forward.
His thumb and forefingers tweak my nipples.
I’m afraid I’m going to come right then and there.
Drew pulls away, and we both glance down at his hands wrapped around my breasts. They’re more than a handful and they’re spilling out of his grip. Maybe it’s because I haven’t had sex in a long time, but this is the sexiest hing I’ve ever seen.
“Do you have idea how badly I want to fuck these?” Drew asks, his voice raspy.
I moan at the image. I take it back, that might be the sexiest thing I’ll ever see.
“I’ll let you,” I whisper.
His heated eyes never leaving mine, he removes his hand from one breast and brings it to his mouth. His teeth graze my nipple teasingly and I groan, my head falling back.
Drew circles my nipple with his tongue before wrapping his mouth around it and sucking sharply. I thrust my hand through his hair, gripping tightly as I watch him. He squeezes and tugs on my other nipple while sucking on the one in his mouth.
The contrasting sensations shoot straight to my clit.
Drew pulls back, my nipple wet and gleaming from his mouth as he moves to the other one. He pulls the curve of my breast into his mouth and sucks hard, making me cry out. He’s marking me, just like I marked him. He pulls away, smiling at the mark he’s left behind.
His mouth is soft and warm, but he tortures me with it. Sucking and pulling on my nipple until I’m writhing on his lap.
“Fuck, you taste so sweet,” Drew groans. He switches back and forth between my nipples, making me lose my mind.
“Drew,” I whimper. My belly twists from the pleasure he’s wreaking on my breasts and my pussy is grinding right over his hard cock.
“I love when you say my name like that,” he says, eyes moving to mine. “I’ve wanted to hear it again since I heard you moan it that night. There’s a desperateness to it, like I’m the only one who can give you what you want.”
“I can’t help it,” I admit.
“I know, baby,” he whispers, breath fanning over my nipple and making me shiver. “Come all over my cock.”
He grabs my ass, thrusting up into me. Wrapping his mouth around my nipple, he nips with his teeth, alternating between sucking and biting. I come with a sharp cry, my pussy convulsing.
Drew kisses his way across my chest and up my neck, sucking and biting. His mouth meets mine as he groans, our tongues twisting together.
My head falls forward onto his shoulder and Drew wraps the throw around me, protecting me from the chill in the room. As I shift off his lap, I notice the wet stain on the crotch of his jeans. I blush in embarrassment and then realize it couldn’t possibly be all from me.
I look up at him. “Did you come in your pants?”
He grips my chin between his thumb and forefinger, tilting my head back to plant a kiss on my lips.
“Jules, you just might be the sexiest woman I’ve ever seen and you were straddling my lap while letting me suck on the tits I’ve been obsessed with for months. Nothing could have stopped me from coming in my pants.”
He curves a hand around my breast, feeling the weight in his palm. “Perfect and beautiful.”
“You’re not bad yourself,” I say, resting my hand on his chest.
“I’m relieved you’re not going into shock this time,” he says, barely containing his laughter.
I look at him, wide-eyed. “That never happened!”
“Of course not.” He shakes his head in mock seriousness, even as he laughs.
I push at his chest, shifting to stand up. As soon as I do, he grabs my waist and pulls me back down so that I land directly on him. He falls back on the couch with me on top of him.
“Andrew,” I cry in protest.
“You can’t escape me now, Juliet.”
“We have to get cleaned up,” I remind him. I can’t just lie here with wet shorts and panties.
“Fine,” he grumbles. Then his eyes move down to my chest. “Come back shirtless.”
I roll my eyes, even as I bite off a smile. “I’m making no promises.”
Giving him a quick, hard kiss, I push away from him and run upstairs.