42. Jules
FORTY-TWO
JULES
“Are you playing the funeral march?” Drew walks into my room and pauses when he hears the music.
“It feels appropriate.” I tug at my dress again, twisting one way and then the other, looking over my shoulder at my butt. I bought several new dresses for tonight’s dinner because I felt everything I had in my closet was going to lead to judgement.
Except I’m not convinced this dress is the right choice. It’s black, floor length, long bell sleeves with a round neck that’s appropriate for dinner in a fancy restaurant with your family. It’s not tight, but it does hug my body in a way that I’m sure my mother will comment on.
My hair’s gotten longer, resting below my shoulders, so I’ve blow dried it.
Honestly, I look good and if I were the kind of person who sought social validation, I’d post a picture online and let people tell me how amazing I look.
“I have to change,” I say, turning to look at Drew. “You have to change!”
He’s wearing a tailored dark grey suit, white shirt, and black tie. Walking further into my room, he stands behind me so we’re both looking in the mirror.
“Why do I have to change?” Drew asks. He smooths his hand down the front of his jacket.
“Because it’s Halloween and we look like we’re cosplaying Morticia and Gomes Addams,” I say with distress.
Drew settles his hands on my waist and leans down, pressing a searing kiss against my neck. “Are you saying you don’t want me to be obsessed with you, mi amor?”
I giggle and groan, my emotions completely haywire. I rest my back against his chest with a sigh. “I do want you to be obsessed with me.”
“I’ve accomplished that mission successfully.” Drew growls, his hand coming to rest on my belly as he pulls me back against him.
I rest my head on his chest, tilting my head to the side to look at him.
He looks devastatingly handsome and I don’t want to take him around my mother for even a second.
The last thing I want to do tonight is go have dinner with my parents.
Even the month and a half leading up to tonight hasn’t been enough for me to mentally prepare myself.
Dr. Kim and I have discussed going no contact with my parents. I always tell her the same thing--unless I figure out how to completely disappear off the face of this Earth, my mother will find some way to torture me.
“You’re so pretty,” I say, blinking up at him wide-eyed.
“I believe it’s called the girlfriend effect,” he says. “I can’t walk into that restaurant looking like a nerdy jock.”
“But you are a nerdy jock,” I point out. Turning around to face him, I smooth back an unruly curl of his hair.
Drew gently grazes his thumb along my jaw, tilting my head back.
“Do you need me to fake an emergency?”
I’m filled with immense gratitude for him as I shake my head. “It won’t make a difference, trust me.”
He looks a bit tense, brows dipped in a frown, the corners of his mouth turned down. I wish my family was normal so he could be worried about what my parents will think of him dating their daughter, rather than him worrying about me.
“It’s going to be okay,” I say. “I might need a few extra sessions with Dr. Kim, but I’ll survive.”
Drew dips down, kissing my forehead. “I don’t give a fuck about propriety and even less fucks about your parents. If they say anything or if you want to leave, we’re leaving.”
Too nervous to say anything, I just nod in agreement. As much as I don’t want him to go with me, I’m also grateful he’ll be there because he’ll keep his wits about himself and get us out of there.
“I have something for you,” he says.
“What is it?”
He tells me to stay put and heads to his room, coming back a minute later with a blue jewelry box.
It’s a large square box and he opens it, revealing the most stunning necklace I’ve ever seen.
It’s a gold and diamond choker necklace.
The neckpiece has five birds in flight with a ruby hanging in the center.
“Drew,” I breathe. “This is…”
I’m speechless. Safe to say this is the most expensive and beautiful gift anyone has ever given me. I’m not sure I can accept it.
Drew takes the necklace out of the box and turns me so I’m facing the mirror again. He slings the necklace around my neck, the cold metal making me shiver. I reach up, letting my fingers graze over the diamonds.
“It’s beautiful,” I whisper.
Drew looks at me in the mirror. “It’s nothing but hard stone and cold metal. You make it beautiful.”
“There’s a very real chance my mother will reach across the table and try to pull it off my neck.”
“Then I’ll call the police on her for stealing.” Drew leans down to whisper in my ear. “Maybe one day you’ll let me fuck you while you wear nothing but this necklace.”
My body responds to the dark promise of his words by immediately growing soft and wet.
“Maybe,” I muse. “If you play your cards right and ask nicely.”
He grins at me in the mirror.
I look like a different person with this necklace on.
I have expensive pieces of jewelry, some which I’ve purchased myself or some left by Gemma or my grandparents.
I just don’t wear them often. It’s not like I don’t want to wear them.
I’ve just always been afraid that I’m not worthy, not even of the things I’ve purchased myself.
How silly of me to forget that I’m worthy, no matter who’s standing behind me.
Belmonte’s is one of those restaurants where no one will raise an eyebrow if I walk in wearing a necklace worth hundreds of thousands of dollars. In fact, as the maitre d takes my coat, I feel a few appreciative glances towards me and I immediately want to die.
I’m not someone who minds attention, but I only thrive in certain kinds of attention and only when I want it. Right now, the last thing I want is anyone’s attention on me.
Drew settles his hand on my back and I breathe out, relaxing my shoulders.
I’m going to be fine.
“The Loves have already arrived and are seated,” the maitre d says. “If you follow me, I’ll lead you to the table.”
“Ten bucks says it’s a table in the center of the room,” I whisper to Drew.
The maitre d stops at the table where my parents are seated, directly in the middle of the dining room. Drew’s fingers flex on my back and I realize it’s the first time he’s meeting my parents, which means it’s the first time he’s looking at my mother.
I look a lot like her. Over the years, she’s had some cosmetic procedures done to keep her younger, to the point where she can now pass as my twin. To the point where she colors her brown hair blonde to match my exact shade.
It’s one of those psychotic things where a celebrity fan goes so deep into a parasocial relationship they change everything about themselves to literally become that celebrity. Except I’m not a celebrity and this is my mother.
They stand up when we reach the table, my dad reaching out to give me a warm hug. He’s tall and still has a full head of blond hair that’s lighter now than it was when I was little. He’s got a few more wrinkles and a few more pounds, but he’s still as handsome as I remember.
“Jules!” He smiles warmly.
“Juliet, come give mama a hug, baby.”
Pulling away from my father, I turn to my mother, keeping my smile in place and lean in to hug her. Her vanilla scented perfume triggers a lot of memories and I pull back as soon as possible.
“Let me look at you,” she says, holding me at arm’s length. “Still as beautiful as ever.” The softest frown mars her brow as she thins her lips. “That dress is a little low cut for a family dinner, don’t you think so Julie? If only Gemma had taught you the proper etiquettes.”
Drew hasn’t released me. In fact, his arm has circled around to my waist and his fingers flex, digging his fingers into my waist as he tugs me back to his side. The action causes my mother’s eyes to shift up and the absolute delight in her eyes makes my stomach curdle.
“Juliet, introduce us to your handsome gentleman,” mother says.
“This is Drew Callahan. Drew, these are my parents, Kate and Harry Love.”
My father shakes his hand and as Drew turns to my mother with his hand raised, she pushes it away.
“Oh, now, we’re practically family,” she coos, leaning in to hug him. Drew remains standing straight, not bending into the hug. Since he hasn’t released me, I’m still plastered to his side so my mother can’t even hug him properly.
After an awkward one way hug, she releases him.
“Sit, sit!”
Drew pulls out my chair and we sit down.
“We ordered wine for the table,” Dad says, just as a server appears to fill our glasses.
“Drew, how are your parents?” Mom asks. “I haven’t seen them since you were all kids.”
“My parents are fine,” Drew replies.
I pick up my wine glass and take a sip. I wonder how many of these I have to drink before I become tipsy enough to tolerate this dinner.
“Does your mother still teach at the university? And your father is all alone at home?” Mom asks.
She sounds like she feels sorry for Mr. Callahan, when his wife’s career has literally nothing to do with him. Dr. Callahan enjoys working, she spent years in school and came up through the ranks when women in male dominated fields such as academia was a huge fucking deal.
“Yes, my father loves seeing my mother thrive in her chosen career. He loves her,” Drew answers. I don’t miss the subtle emphasis on love.
“Well, I, for one, am glad you’re dating our Juliet,” mother says. “She really needs someone with direction and focus in her life, someone who will take care of her. I’m sure you’re perfectly capable of fulfilling that rule. Isn’t that right, Adam?”
Dad nods. “Of course, dear.”
Drew scoffs. “I’ve never known Juliet to need anyone’s help. In fact, she’s quite capable of taking care of herself. She’s put me in my place many times.”
Below the table, I put my hand on his thigh. It's as solid as a rock beneath my hand. How many squats is he doing?
“Jules, are you being rude to Drew?” Mother asks, looking at me with disappointment. Of course, that’s what she took from what he said.
“No, I’m just making sure he’s not rude to me.”