Chapter Nineteen #2
He lets up on my mouth, and his voice softens. I lick my lips, savoring the taste of him there, still as he continues.
“There’s a lot I don’t know. I don’t know the first thing about renovating an old Victorian mansion. I don’t know what all my limits are, soft or hard. Yet.”
His voice falters for a moment, and he bites his lip before looking back up at me with determination and confidence. It’s hot as hell, I won’t deny that.
“And I don’t know that I will not find a way to completely fuck this up, but I do know one thing.”
“What’s that?” I whisper, unsure if he’ll clamp his hand over my mouth again, but also wanting to see if he will.
“You make me feel like I can handle all of it. You make me feel limitless.”
Tears pool in my eyes, as I breathe his name. “Nate…”
“I get that you’re scared,” he says softly. “I’m scared, too.”
I note the glimmer in his eyes, and his hand slides down my neck, over my bare chest. His touch is warm, smooth. He settles it over my heart.
Then he grabs my hand and places it on his chest as he holds my gaze.
I feel his heartbeat beneath my palm, beating fast. Thump, thump, thump.
“I’m scared I’m making a mistake. I’m scared I’m going to tell you all of this and it’s not going to matter. But the thing that scares me the most?”
He licks his lips as he leans his face up, his lips inches from mine.
“Is the thought of letting you go.”
I slide my hand up his chest, over his shoulder and rest it on his neck. His pulse races beneath my touch, his lips part, and his gaze is full of truth and determination and a vulnerability that is sharper than any knife.
“You’re right,” I say, my voice shaking. “I am scared.”
I ball his shirt in my fist as I tighten my grip on him, needing to anchor myself because I feel like I might crumble into a million pieces at any second.
“I’m scared because you make everything feel okay for me, too.”
Nate looks up at me.
“And I don’t want to lose that.” I swallow hard. “But I don’t know how to do this.” I point between us.
“I don’t know how to be what you need. I don’t know if I can change, I—”
“I don’t want you to change, August.” His voice is low, soft; yet somehow stronger than I’ve ever heard it.
My heart nearly stops as I realize what he’s said.
“That is your name, right?” he says with a faint smirk.
I nod. “It is.”
“I want you just like this,” Nate says, reaching for my jaw. He guides me down to his lips, but he doesn’t close the distance.
I look in his eyes, and the noise in my head quiets. I don’t think, the words just come. Freely. Easily.
“Then take me, Nathaniel.”
Nate leans up and kisses me, but this kiss isn’t like the others. It’s softer, sweeter. Nate kisses me slowly, setting the pace. I follow his lead, savoring the feel of his lips, of his warm, solid body as it presses against me.
When I break away, I find his gaze with my own.
“With pleasure,” he says, as he crushes his lips to mine once more and his kiss morphs into something much harsher, much more passionate. His mouth finds my neck as his hands find my hips.
I grasp his neck and force his face upward, crushing my mouth to his.
It’s a dance only we understand; this push and pull, this fire and ice. Because we are broken, but together we fit just right.
Together we’re whole.
“Your safe word is red, right?” he says as I pull at his hoodie to remove it.
“Yes,” I breathe as he goes in for my mouth again, shoving at my sweatpants.
“So, if you want me to stop, say red.”
It’s not a question. It’s an order.
The words come easily, and when I say them, I feel a deep sense of relief.
“Yes, Sir.”
Nate drops to the floor as he pulls my briefs down, freeing my cock, and I nearly gasp from the sight alone. Because Nate, on his knees, is a prettier picture than I could have ever imagined.
“This okay?” he asks, his voice crisp and clear as he takes my cock in his hand. I nod.
“Yes…”
“Good,” he murmurs. “Because I’m going to show you just how fucking frustrating it is when you don’t get what you want.”
I can’t help the smirk on my face.
“Is that so?” I ask.
Nate doesn’t respond with words. Instead, he takes my cock into his mouth and settles his hands on my ass and the minute my cock hits the back of his throat, I feel my insides twist.
“Nate…” I breathe, feeling the familiar percolating desire starting to culminate.
He licks, bites, and sucks at my cock as one hand finds my balls, and I have to brace myself against the doorframe to keep from going down like a stone.
“I’m going to—”
He pops off of me, and I hiss, my dick throbbing because I was so close, but…
“Not yet,” he says. Then dives back in and takes me into his mouth until I hit the back of his throat and he gags. My body feels like a livewire; electric and full of power.
Power I’ve never felt before.
Once again, my orgasm starts to swell, and my head gets dizzy.
“Nate…” I cry. “Stop, I’m going to–”
He pops off of me, licking his swollen lips. I watch as his gaze darkens and he pushes me against the edge of the couch, which makes me fall back too easily. My cock bobs freely, glistening with precum in the low light.
Nate stands before me, and I watch as he slides his jeans and his boxer briefs clean off; that dark look in his eye making my cock twitch.
He takes his cock in his hand and starts to stroke himself.
My eyes fixate on his cock—or more aptly the prominent vein that is bulging along his perfect, smooth shaft.
His pink head glistens with precum, which only makes me want to taste him again.
“Tell me what you want, Mister Hot Stuff,” he says, and I swear I’ve never heard anything hotter. I groan, aching to touch myself, to be touched, and brought to release, and the words fall out of my mouth.
“You,” I say. “I want to taste you.”
Nate grins as he saunters over to me, pushing me down into the bed.
I get a look at him—at all of him. His long, pale legs, his thick cock dripping with arousal.
His jeweled gaze full of fire. He throws his leg over me and I can’t help myself.
I know I should wait, but I don’t want to wait any longer.
I grab his ass and pull him down, finding his hole with my tongue.
“Fuck!”
He nearly jumps off the bed. I have to focus on not laughing, because I know he’s probably blushing right now. And he’s so fucking cute when he blushes.
I can’t get enough of the taste of him, the feel of him. I get lost in the sounds escaping his throat, knowing they are because of me.
And then I hear his spit, and my balls start to tighten, knowing what’s next.
Except, Nate doesn’t grab my cock. He probes one finger over my hole, pressing in just enough to apply pressure, but he doesn’t push further.
“Do you want me to stop?” he asks, his voice dark.
“No,” I mutter, sinking my fingernails into his flesh. My gaze settles on the pink swells from my fingernails, and I let out a deep groan. My cock throbs and I absentmindedly thrust it in the air.
“I want more,” I say.
Nate hums out a sound of contentment and his response is sliding his finger in a little more as he takes my cock in his mouth and starts to suck.
I cry out around his dick as he fucks my mouth while groaning and sucking me like I’m his favorite meal.
He stops, and I cry out once more. I was so close! So fucking close.
Nate removes himself, and the guilt, the pain starts to resurface because he moves away from me, but before I can plead for him to stay, he straddles me and his voice carries between us.
“Sit up,” he says, and I listen without hesitation. The motion drives my cock up against his and he looks me in my eyes, his gaze firm and full of confidence.
“Eyes on me,” he says, his voice a balm to my aching soul.
I feel his hand wrap around my cock—no, both of our cocks—and I move to look, but his free hand stops me by grabbing my neck.
“I said, eyes on me,” he says, his voice firm, but harsh.
I keep my gaze on him as he starts to stroke us. His cock slides against mine, hard and wet; warm and addicting.
“Come with me,” he says. It’s not a question or a mere suggestion.
It’s a promise.
His voice softens as my breathing increases, and I feel my orgasm barreling towards me.
“Come with me, August. Please,” he whispers as he kisses me. My body obeys him as I submit to the pleasure, to his touch, his kiss, his pleas. It’s the sweetest surrender, and I know as his body shudders, as cum floods my shaft that everything will be okay.
Because I have him, and he has me.
“Oh, fuck,” Nate curses as he kisses me, his cock pulsing aginst mine.
I roll him over, finding his wrists with my hands and place them above his head.
I stare down at him in awe, at those long eyelashes, those heavenly eyes, and the prettiest shade of pink smattering his cheeks.
I reach one hand out and trace the faint stubble on his jaw.
“Thank you,” I whisper. Nate gives me a soft smile.
His kiss is a welcome answer, and I submit to it freely.
And when the darkness takes me under, I don’t fight it because I know when I wake up, the light will return, brighter than it was before.