Chapter Eleven – Caden
Caden
There was nothing more beautiful than a winter morning on the ranch. Gatlin rode ahead of me with my uncle Mike as they guided the cattle to the west side of the ranch.
“Penny for your thoughts.”
Glancing behind me, I smiled at my father. “What are you doing out here, Dad?”
“I may be retired, but I still get the itch to ride out and round up some cattle.”
“In these temperatures?”
He laughed as he motioned ahead of us. “That’s a beautiful sight.”
Glancing at the snow-covered Rocky Mountains, I nodded. “It sure is.”
“You looked like you were thinking pretty hard as I rode up.”
“Not really. Just enjoying the brisk morning.”
“Your mother tells me Lilibeth was stuck at your place for a couple of days during the storm. I trust she was okay?”
“She was. Cold and tired, but not hurt otherwise.”
When he didn’t say anything else, I turned to look at him. “What is it you want to say, Dad?”
“What makes you think I have anything to say?”
We both came to a stop, and I turned my horse so I could face my father. “Because you’re my dad, and I know you better than anyone.”
His brows rose.
“Okay, maybe not better than Mom.”
Laughing, he looked back toward the cattle. “I knew the moment I saw your mother that she was the one.”
When he looked back at me, I could see myself reflected in his eyes. Everyone said I was the spitting image of my father, and the older I got, the more I saw it. Not just in looks, but in other ways, too.
“Dad, I’m not sure what Mom told you, but—”
He held up a hand. “I’m not trying to lecture you, Caden.
But I will tell you one thing. If you find someone who makes your entire being light up, simply because she exists in your world, don’t let her go.
I saw you with Lilibeth the morning you brought her back to her car.
A man doesn’t look at a woman like that and not have feelings for her. ”
I wanted to tell him that he had it all wrong. That I didn’t have feelings for Lilibeth, but I’d be lying to my father…and I never lied to my parents.
“It’s complicated, Dad.”
“Ahh, yes. The ‘it’s complicated’ reasoning. Does Rachel have anything to do with why it’s so complicated?”
I nodded and looked back toward my brother and uncle. They had almost gotten all the cattle into the pasture. “I don’t know why I can’t open my heart. The thought of doing it…I don’t want to go through that kind of pain again.”
“You called it. Love is definitely complicated. But it’s also one of the most beautiful things in this world, Caden. It’s a deep commitment between two people, and it’s not just about sex.”
“Dad,” I groaned.
He smiled. “It’s about intimacy, and the need for the person you love to always be safe and happy.
” He placed a hand over his heart. “A deep connection in here, and it’s not fleeting.
It’s about wanting to see the person you love succeed at everything they do.
It’s empathy, commitment, trust, and most importantly…
honesty. It’s selfless, yet passionate. It’s patient and kind.
It’s a partnership that can teach us so many things, son. How to grow, trust, heal.
“Love is the most powerful emotion we have. And when it’s true, it doesn’t lie, steal, or cheat. Sometimes when we think we feel it, but it’s simply another emotion disguised as love. Let me ask you something about Rachel.”
I exhaled. There was no use in trying to get him off the subject until he’d said what he came here to say. “Ask away.”
“Why did she say no when you asked her to marry you?”
Laughing, I replied, “Shit, Dad. Just straight to the point?”
He tipped his cowboy hat at me. “Only way I know how.”
I looked back over the ranch that I loved with my whole heart. “She thought I’d be getting the ranch once Grandpa passed, and that I’d sell. Move out of River Falls and start a new life.”
“That’s what she wanted.”
“Yeah, that’s what she wanted.” I faced him once again.
“It took me almost a year afterward before I could fully accept that she never wanted anything but her own happiness. Maybe I always knew that, but didn’t want to see it.
Maybe I subconsciously thought if I waited long enough, she’d come around.
I know I’m better off without her, Dad. I know that. ”
“Does your heart know that? If she showed up today and asked you to take her back, would you?”
My mind instantly conjured an image of Lilibeth. Her beautiful, smiling face looking up at me after we’d made love. It surprised me for a moment, that mental image. Especially after what my father had just asked.
“No.”
“You didn’t hesitate to answer.”
“Because I know in my heart she isn’t what I want.”
His brows raised. “Is there someone you do want?”
My heart nearly answered for me. “No. At least, not right now.”
He smiled. “You’ll know, Caden. Trust me, you’ll know. It’ll happen when you least expect it, and when it does, you’ll be knocked off your feet.”
“Like you were with Mom?”
“Like I was with your mother. The greatest day of my life, other than the day you kids were born, was the day I laid eyes on that woman. She’s my heart and soul.”
Gatlin’s whistle caused us both to turn and look in his direction. One of the calves had gotten loose, and I wasn’t paying any attention.
“Let’s see how your roping skills are,” my father said with a smirk.
“Is that a challenge, old man?” I asked, as I pulled up my rope.
Before I even knew what was happening, my father took off.
I kicked Draco’s sides and quickly caught up to my father. Unfortunately, he beat me to it, had already roped the calf, and was leading her back toward the pasture gate.
Gatlin laughed as we rode up. “You still got it, Dad.”
“He never lost it!” Uncle Mike added.
After the calf was reunited with her mother, my father turned to us. “Finish up here. Your mother will be expecting everyone up at the house in a few hours.”
It was Christmas Eve, and one of my mother’s favorite days of the year.
Ever since I was little, I looked forward to all the traditions that took place on Christmas Eve.
Family traditions were something my mother loved, and I knew it was because she’d grown up in a cold family, one that didn’t give her any traditions whatsoever.
“You boys go on back and take care of your horses. I’ve got this,” Uncle Mike said, as he motioned with his hat for the cattle to move on out into the pasture.
Turning to my father, I raised a brow. “Race you back to the barn?”
He laughed. “I would, but I’ve got to talk to your uncle about a few things. You boys go on ahead, and I’ll see you this evening.”
Gatlin and I exchanged a look before calling out our goodbyes to our uncle. As we rode off, my brother looked over his shoulder before asking, “What do you think that’s about?”
I glanced over my own shoulder. “Not sure.”
“What was Dad talking to you about?”
I let out a soft laugh. “Love.”
“Love?” he asked, confused. “Why?”
I sighed. “Apparently, our sisters told Mom about Lilibeth staying with me at the house for a couple days.”
“Oh hell.”
I laughed. “Exactly.”
We rode for a few minutes in silence before Gatlin broke it. “So, did something happen? Ensley and Emeline have been tight-lipped about it.”
I cleared my throat but didn’t say anything.
“Damn it, Caden. I really like Lilibeth.”
When I glared at him, he held up a hand. “Not like that. I think she’s a super-sweet person. I don’t want to see her getting hurt, is all.”
“And you think I’m going to hurt her?”
“I think you’re so far up in your own head that you wouldn’t mean to hurt her…but yeah, I’m worried you’ll hurt her.”
I exhaled a long breath. “Something happened, but we were both very clear about where it would lead.”
“And that is?”
“Nowhere. I was honest with her and told her I wasn’t ready for anything other than casual. We both knew that when the storm cleared our time together would end. We shared a couple great days and that’s the end of it. We’re friends now, and I want to maintain a friendship with her.”
“So, no more fighting like cats and dogs then?”
I shrugged. “I hope not.”
“And you’re going to be okay with seeing her tomorrow?”
My head nearly snapped clean off as I whipped it around to look at my younger brother. “What do you mean?”
“No one told you then? Lilibeth and her parents are coming over for Christmas. Things won’t be awkward, will they?”
“Why should they be?” I asked, even as my gut tightened. “We both went into it with our eyes wide open.”
He nodded. “That’s good then.”
“So tomorrow will be fine. I’m glad they’ll be spending Christmas with us.”
I hoped my brother couldn’t see through that huge lie. In truth, I was worried about seeing Lilibeth again. I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about her, and every second of those two days we spent together.
Gatlin laughed. “Until Dad breaks out the games.”
I grinned. “Let’s hope they’re a rowdy bunch!”
“Caden, if you eat one more brownie, you’re not going to be able to eat dinner.”
I popped the last of the brownie into my mouth as my mother rolled her eyes.
“Mom, you yourself call them oh-my-God brownies. They’re that addictive.”
She smiled. “I know, but I’d like to keep some for Christmas Day. We’re having guests.”
“I heard,” Emeline said, as she walked up with plates and silverware. “Lilibeth and her parents are coming over. I’m excited!”
I took the plates from my sister and headed to the dining room, but not before saying, “That was nice of you to invite them.”
My mother followed Emeline and me into the dining room. “It’s their first Christmas in town, and I really want them to feel welcome and relaxed. Especially poor Lilibeth. She must be stressed, since finding out she has to look for a new place to live.”
I was putting a plate down on the table and stopped midway. “Why?”
Mom sighed. “Larry White, who owns that little place she rents? The heater went out a few weeks back, and he had to replace it. Then the refrigerator died, and he had to buy a new one. Then there’s an ongoing problem with the garage door, and there’ve been some other issues.
I guess he told Lilibeth it’s becoming too much, and he’s going to have to sell. ”
“Did he offer to sell it to her?” I asked.
Emeline answered. “He did, but she can’t afford it right now with the store and all.”
“Is the store profitable?” I asked, as I set the last plate down.
“It is, yes,” Emeline replied. “But I think Lilibeth is trying to save up for something bigger. Her place is so small.”
I nodded and glanced at my mother. “What else can I do?”
“If you don’t mind getting the stuff out of the pantry for the hot chocolate bar. We’re having friends over this evening, as well, for some games.”
Emeline and I both froze and said at the same time, “Games?”
“I thought Gatlin was kidding,” Emeline stated.
Our mother grinned. “Yep! Now that we no longer have to worry about setting things up for the kids tomorrow since we pushed the date out a few days, we can do all the fun things on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day! I’m so excited.”
We watched her walk to the kitchen.
“Did she really just say we’re playing games tonight?” I whispered.
Emeline let out a low groan. “I’d better go warn Levi.”
“Better tell Ensley and Gatlin, as well. It’s not too late for them to fake being sick.”
“What?” Emeline said with a laugh. “That’s terrible, Caden Wilde.”
I snarled my lip. “Please, like it didn’t cross your mind.”
Screwing up her face in the most adorable way, she giggled. “It did!”
Dinner was a roast with potatoes, carrots, and green beans that our grandmother, Nellie, prepared.
Uncle Mike and Uncle David were there as well as their wives.
Unfortunately, our Uncle Jason, an NFL coach, was on the road because his team was playing on Christmas Day, but that’s not unusual with his career.
Rhett, Emeline’s son by marriage, ran through the house with his two close friends, Katie and Jimmy Mills. They’d lost both of their parents in an accident and were currently being fostered by my sister and Levi.
“Those kids sure do get along,” I said to Levi before I took a drink of my beer.
“They do. They’re thick as thieves, just like we were at that age.”
I smiled as I watched Emeline bend down and whisper something to Katie, who seemed upset by something the two boys had said or done. She was going to make a wonderful mother someday.
“Speaking of Katie and Jimmy, Emeline and I were going to talk to everyone, since both of our families are here tonight.”
“About?” I asked, my curiosity piqued.
He suddenly seemed nervous.
I playfully punched his arm. “Levi, I’m your best friend. If you can’t tell me what’s going on, who can you tell?”
He swallowed hard before saying in a lowered voice, “Emeline and I are thinking of adopting Katie and Jimmy.”
I was pretty sure my eyes were as big as the dinner plates. “Wow. Okay, that’s a big news bomb.”
He nodded and rubbed the back of his neck. “I know, but it’s something we both feel pretty passionate about. Rhett already loves them both as if they were his brother and sister. My biggest worry was that he might be using them to replace Brooke.”
Brooke was Levi’s daughter, who was killed in a car accident nearly a year ago.
“I don’t think he’s trying to replace her. I think he’s found two kindred spirits who can remind him that it’s okay to be a kid again.”
Levi smiled, his eyes filled with relief. “Thank you, Caden. I needed to hear that.”
I placed my hand on his shoulder and squeezed. “No matter what you and Emeline decide to do, Levi, you know we’re all here to support you.”
He nodded. “I appreciate it. I hope someday, you find someone as amazing as your sister and you’ll be as happy as I am.”
I forced a smile. “Who knows. I’m not holding my breath.”
I heard voices from the front of the house as my mother raced past us. “The Mitchels are here. It’s time to start the games!” The Mitchel family owned the ranch next to ours.
Levi gave me a questioning look. “Games?”
Slapping his back, I said, “Tell me you didn’t forget about my mother’s love of games.”
A pained look crossed his face. “It’s slowly coming back.”
Laughing, I added, “Welcome to the family.”