Chapter 2
Ford
When I'd moved home, I knew it was a possibility that I'd see Natasha. I'd heard that her parents had died and that she and her sister had used their inheritance to buy Christmas Town, the aging resort destination for everything Christmas.
Most people thought they were crazy for sinking their money into the town, but at one time, I'd known Natasha better than anyone else. She'd always wanted to open a bed-and-breakfast, and maybe she saw this as her chance.
She was living her dream, and I was happy for her.
I didn't know if she had a significant other or any details of her life between our breakup and her parents' death.
When I enlisted, I was overwhelmed by my new job.
I was part of something bigger than me, and my high-school relationship felt small compared to my calling.
It wasn't fair for me to drag Natasha along for the ride when we were so young.
The mistake was not telling her how I felt.
Instead, I created distance between us until she had no choice but to confront me and break things off.
I wasn't proud of that. I was young and stupid.
I thought I'd get over her and move on. Who met the love of their life in high school? But I'd never felt something similar for another woman.
Looking back, I wasn't sure I'd handled that situation correctly.
At the time, breaking up seemed like the right thing to do.
But now that my military career was in the rearview mirror, I wondered about the what-ifs.
What if I'd treated her with more care? What if I made more of an effort? Would we be married now with kids?
That was crazy because military relationships aren't easy with the deployments and constant moves. She never would have been able to hold a steady job, and how would she ever have started a business? I told myself that it was better that I let her go.
There might be some leftover animosity, and it certainly wouldn't hurt to apologize for the way I handled things. It might smooth our relationship enough that she'd feel more comfortable working with me.
Renovating Mistletoe Inn was my first solo project for Sterling Brothers since starting my new position, and I wanted to do a good job. My brothers wanted to pool their various specialties—electrician, plumber, and landscaping—and open a business.
Our friend Cooper had the contracting experience, so they included him. The business itself was fairly new, and they were still trying to prove themselves as reliable contractors in the area.
After meeting with Natasha, I returned to my office, typing the details into the computer. Cooper leaned a shoulder against the doorframe of the office. "How'd it go this morning?"
I ran a hand through my hair, leaning back in my chair. "Good. I think. I met with Natasha."
His eyes widened. "You two dated in high school."
There was a time when Natasha spent a lot of time at our house, eating Sunday dinners and playing family game night. Those memories kept me warm on long nights of deployments. "She was my first real girlfriend."
Cooper nodded. "Maria thought you'd marry her one day. She was upset when you broke things off so early in your military career. She thought you'd made a mistake."
I did a double take. "She never said anything to me about it."
Cooper stepped further into the room. "She was careful not to upset you on your calls. She said you had enough to deal with."
I sighed. "That's my mom, always looking out for everyone."
Cooper sat in the chair across from me. "This is a big account for us. Will it be an issue for you to work with Natasha?"
"You can count on me." I wanted to prove that I was capable of doing this job. Cooper and my brothers had taken a chance on me, and I wouldn't let them down.
Cooper's brow furrowed. "Of course we can count on you. You're disciplined and hardworking."
"I'm concerned about what we're going to find behind the walls at the inn. They only made cosmetic changes before opening the place for guests."
"There's no guarantee in a place like that. The electrical and plumbing might need an update."
"They own the inn and the town itself." That was something I couldn't wrap my mind around. Who bought an entire town?
"That means they're going to need a lot of help. The individual shops and restaurants might need work too," Cooper said, probably calculating how big of a project this could be.
"That's what I was thinking."
"Where does she want you to start?"
"The bathrooms. I suggested she consider new carpeting and paint too. Everything is worn and outdated."
"If we handle this right, we can prove that we're capable of large projects."
I rubbed my neck. "Are you sure you want me handling this on my first job? Maybe I should start with a single-family home."
Cooper shook his head. "I want you to take lead on this. Unless you think it will be messy working with your ex?"
"We broke up years ago when we were just kids." Kids that thought they were in love. But what did we know about that? I thought I'd see the world and meet other women who'd rival what I had with Natasha. But I never found that connection with anyone else.
When Natasha and I first got together, we'd never kissed anyone else, much less been in a relationship. Everything was new, bright, and shiny.
Real life was hard. It came with challenges and obstacles. We never would have survived in the real world with the demands of my job and her classes.
I needed to prove that I could handle this project without much oversight. This was my chance to solidify my position at Sterling Brothers.
Cooper stood and touched my shoulder. "It's good having you and Lincoln home."
My brother Lincoln was one of the few doctors in town. He'd recently moved home from Denver and fallen in love with one of his patients, Penny, during a snowstorm.
Lincoln quickly acclimated to life in our hometown.
But things were different for me. I'd lived far away for so long; I'd lost touch with people.
I'd drifted away, severing some ties permanently.
I wasn't sure a working relationship was salvageable with Natasha, much less a friendship.
"I'll talk to Natasha. Make sure she's good with us working together. "
"That's a good idea." Cooper stood and made his way to the door.
"I wouldn't do anything to compromise the business."
He leveled me with a look. "I never thought you would."
Cooper and my brothers had a lot of faith in me. But I hadn't been a part of civilian life as an adult. This was new territory for me. I wasn't sure I'd get it right, and I didn't want to disappoint anyone. "I just don't want to let you down."
"If it's too much, you can take off for a bit, get accustomed to everything before taking on a job."
My jaw tightened. "I can do it."
"I think it's a good idea to clear the air with Natasha first. We don't want there to be any issues when we're mid-project. This could be huge for us." His excitement was palpable.
This was a huge deal for the business, and I couldn't screw it up. "You can count on me."
"Aspen works at the front counter, checking in guests. You can keep an eye on her."
I gave him a look. "Now why would I want to do that?"
"Your brothers are protective of her."
"Aspen's an adult. She can take care of herself." I wondered why Cooper was asking. He'd been around for so long; he felt like one of my brothers, but he wasn't.
"I'm sure she can," Cooper said dryly, walking out of my office.
I refocused on my computer screen, staring at the numbers until they blurred.
I let my mind drift to Natasha and how she looked when I ran into her at the inn.
She'd filled out since we dated. She was a woman now with the curves to back up the title.
I assumed I'd be meeting with Eve, since she was the one who'd reached out for an estimate.
I was surprised to see Natasha at the front counter.
Natasha had been through so much. Our breakup, the death of her parents, and the burden of starting a new business with shop and restaurant owners relying on her.
I couldn't take on the project if I thought I couldn't be the contractor she needed for the large job ahead. I couldn't let our past get in the way. Before I could send her the estimate, we needed to talk about it.
I emailed Natasha to let her know I'd be coming by with the estimate when it was ready. I decided to wait until later in the day. I had no idea when the busy time was for an inn, but I assumed she'd be off in the evening since I saw her working during the day.
I parked in the lot where the light poles were adorned with wreaths. Everything was covered in lights. It was like walking into another world, where it was Christmas all year long.
I understood the appeal. I felt warm and cozy whenever I spent time here. I walked up the concrete steps that were lined with red lanterns, containing flickering candles. I opened the heavy wood door and stepped inside.
Holiday music played softly in the background, and several guests milled around the great-room area, sipping something out of mugs and snacking on Christmas cookies.
"Welcome to Mistletoe Inn, big brother," Aspen said with a smile.
I approached, accepting the side hug she gave me. "I didn't know what your shift was here."
"Evenings and some weekends," Aspen said as she resumed her spot behind the counter.
"Is Natasha here? I have her estimate."
"She told me to send you to her room when you arrived."
I wasn't so sure that was a good idea, but there wouldn't be any privacy here.
"She's in the innkeeper's suite."
My heart rate picked up, knowing that we'd be alone in her apartment again. "I remember where it is."
Aspen nodded. "I'll let her know that you're on your way."
"Thank you," I said before crossing the lobby to the grand staircase. I wondered if she'd decide it was a bad time of year to start construction.
On the top floor, I headed toward the door at the end of the hallway and knocked.
A few seconds later, I heard the soft pad of footsteps as if she was wearing thick socks. Then the door opened. "Ford."
I stepped inside, feeling stiff. "It's good to see you again."
She closed the door behind me. "I thought you were going to email the estimate.”
"That's usually how we handle estimates. It gives customers time to review it before contacting us with any questions. But given our past, I thought we should talk."
Her forehead wrinkled. "Oh?"
"Is there somewhere we can be comfortable?" I asked, looking around the apartment.
It was neat and organized with the bare minimum for furniture and decor. The lack of holiday decorations was noticeable. I wondered if she wanted an escape from Christmas in her personal space.
She waved a hand toward the sliding glass door. "I was reading on the balcony. Would you like to sit out there? The heaters are on."
"That's fine." I followed her outside, where she had a couch, a few end tables, and heaters placed throughout the space.
The balcony faced the town square, the railing wrapped in twinkling white lights. A Christmas tree stood in the corner.
"There's a tree on the balconies, so that when guests look up, they can see them." She sat on the couch, pulling a throw over her lap.
"That's a nice touch," I said, sitting next to her.
She flicked her hand to the other side of her apartment. "I have another balcony that's more private. That one has a hot tub."
I wondered if she brought men to that balcony for dates. Had she shared the hot tub with anyone? It wasn't supposed to matter who she spent her time with. We'd broken up a long time ago, and I didn't have a claim on her anymore.
I was here to apologize for my behavior when we were dating, not think about who she was dating now. It was none of my business.
She shifted so that she faced me. "What did you want to talk about?"
I pulled the estimate out of a folder I'd brought. "I wanted to make sure you were okay working with me, and I thought I'd apologize for how I handled things back then."
Her forehead creased. "What do you have to apologize for?"
"I let you do the breaking up."
Her eyes widened slightly.
"When I first enlisted, I pulled away because I was busy. My work was important, and I let it get in the way of us. I didn't make any effort in our relationship. I think I wanted you to break up with me. It was easier but cowardly. I'm not happy about how I behaved."
Something flashed over her face before she waved a dismissive hand. "It was a long time ago. You don't have to apologize for not breaking up with me sooner."
I sat forward, my elbows on my thighs. "I think I'm messing this up."
Natasha's expression softened. "You don't have anything to apologize for. It was what needed to happen at the time."
I was rusty when it came to talking about feelings. "I'm sorry that I didn't handle things more maturely. I should have been a man and told you what was going on. Not make you wonder and worry."
Natasha smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. "I told you it won't be a problem working together again. That was so long ago; it's not even worth talking about."
I thought about our relationship a lot over the years. Whether I'd handled it correctly. Whether I'd made a huge mistake. I didn't like her saying that it wasn't worth revisiting. But at the same time, she was giving me an out. "If you're sure—"
She nodded. "I'm positive."
I didn't know her like I had before. I wasn't sure if she was giving me a line or she really didn't care. It was unsettling. But I'd done what Cooper wanted me to do. I'd ensured that we could move forward with the project.
Our relationship was firmly in the past where it belonged.