16. Jaxon
JAXON
Today, I try to make it to the barns earlier to see her, but work keeps my in my office. The sunrise viewing crowd will trickle out over the next week, and the two weeks after that are full prep for high season, and I can’t afford a distraction. It just… you can’t. It’s not allowed.
And I’m sure that if I say it enough, it will land. It hasn’t yet because I find myself wondering what Della is up to at least a dozen times throughout the day. Plus, I almost called her last night, but refrained. I’m still not sure why.
When I wrap work up at around five, I head right to the barn, hopeful.
Hazel is supposed to show her the ropes, and I’m sure they’re done for the day, but maybe they’re hanging around.
This place has a special way of encouraging you to waste time.
I can’t text my sister because she’s already onto me, and asking if she and Della are there is additional fodder for her.
But when I pull into the barn, I see my sister’s golf cart next to Molly’s car, and get excited that I’m not too late.
I head into the first barn and don’t see them, but when I go out the back to where the paddocks are, all three are there.
Molly is already on her horse; Hazel is holding Storm in place next to the mounting step, and I watch Della hoist herself up.
I can’t help the smile that overtakes my face watching her willingness to go for it.
“Impressive, Tatroe,” I say, announcing my presence. All heads spin to me, but the only one I look at is Della. If I didn’t think her smile could get bigger, I was wrong. And I don’t miss the way she checks me out. No, I’m not the only one feeling this energy crackling between us.
When they say they’re going for an evening ride, I offer to come too.
I don’t love the idea of Della going out when we are still conditioning, but she’s on a horse that’s been out enough.
Or maybe she’s some kind of riding phenom, and I’m about to get schooled.
I grab Thor because he needs a couple more loops, saddle him up, take him out of the barn, and swing my leg up.
This isn’t my horse, but I love this guy.
Trotting over, I strategically position myself next to Della.
“So are you going to blow me out of the water with your riding skills, Del?” I smirk.
She nods before her retort. “Well, probably. And that’s going to be even more impressive because I haven’t ridden a horse outside a handful of times at summer camp.” My smile disappears as I look at my sister, who gives me a dismissive shooing.
“Is this safe?” I ask.
“It’s almost like you forgot this is what I do. Like, for my job, Jax,” my sister replies with sarcasm so thick I’m surprised she didn’t choke on it.
And I get it, but these horses all need to get back in the groove here. If this were the end of summer, I wouldn’t bat an eye. Okay, maybe I would, but it’d be a hell of a lot less likely.
“Regardless,” my sister’s voice cuts off my thoughts, “we’re only doing a short loop.
Quit your worrying. So anyway, Della, here’s what you need to know,” my sister says, and takes Della through some basic commands and how to ride.
She’s right. I am being dramatic. I tune out the instructions and do some mental calculations about what needs to be done tomorrow.
“Ready?” I hear Molly ask, and I check back in.
“Lead the way,” I say.
Hazel takes off, Molly follows, then Della, then me.
It’s a cool view because I can watch Della relax as we get into the ride.
We’re going just under four miles around, but within the first few minutes, I see the tenseness of her shoulders disappear.
When we get into a much more open area, I decide to pull up next to her so we can chit-chat.
Though I know it’s not what I’m supposed to be doing, because we never let our guest horses ride two by two, I want to flirt with this woman, and I have waited all damn day to do so.
“Coming up, Del,” I alert her, and she startles a little. She must have been zoned out. “What do you think?” I ask.
“This is wild that you get to do this whenever you want to. How do you not do this every day?”
“Well, Hazie does it every day. I’m out a couple of times a week.”
“What’s your horse’s name? I’m assuming you have one. And what color is it?” she asks with genuine excitement.
“I do. Wyza, and she’s a beautiful, deep brown.”
“Wyza? How do you spell that?” she side-eyes me with a knowing smirk. I fucking love that she picked up on it immediately.
“W-Y-Z-A.”
“Ah. Superior use of end of alphabet letters. Must have been a coincidence…”
I bellow out a laugh because she nailed it.
“I’d say you’re wrong, but I’d be lying.
When I was sixteen, I made up the name to have the horse with the most end-of-alphabet letters.
I topped out at three, but I hold the record.
I like to think I was channeling the word wise, because Wyza… she’s fucking brilliant.”
Her head tilts back, and she laughs into the sky.
“I love it, Jax. Can you show me her when we get back?” This time, she looks directly at me when she asks, and I feel sparks in my veins.
“I’d love to, Della.”
The trail narrows, and I have to pull back to travel single file, but my heart feels like it’s just overflowing. It’s a reminder of why I didn’t call last night because this seems like way too much feeling… way too soon.
On the back half, we come up on a log blocking the path.
Hazel and Molly go right over, but Della and Storm stop.
This is a recent tree fall, and I’m trying to figure out when it could have happened.
Regardless, Storm is frozen, and before I can tell her to wait it out because the horse will either walk over as the other two did, or find a way around, I see Della pull on the reins instead.
This makes the horse’s head jerk up in response, and he doesn’t like it.
Storm is one of our best trail horses, though, and I know he’ll recover and move forward if she just lets up on him.
I’m about to say that when two fucking rabbits dart out in front of him at Mach three.
The whole thing happens so fast. Storm spooks, snorts, and sidesteps two steps as if he has been yanked.
Della screams, drawing the attention of Hazel and Molly, who turn around to see Storm stop at the log and still again.
“Del, you have to relax,” I say loudly, but trying not to yell to spook him even more. “Just relax, he knows what to do.”
She doesn’t turn to me, but just shakes her head. All the tension is back in her shoulders, which are currently residing at her ears.
“Just squeeze him gently with your heels and keep the reins loose. Storm will do what he knows how to do; he’ll step over the log. I promise,” I say in my calmest voice. But I’m close to jumping off my damn horse, even though I know that has the possibility of sending him.
When her shoulders start to shake, I’m not sure if she’s laughing or crying, but when my sister looks at her with worried eyes, and then at me, I know it’s not hushed giggles.
“Della, it’s okay. I promise,” my sister says before addressing the horse in an even, measured voice. “Walk on, Storm.”
Storm’s ears go forward, and he does exactly what he’s supposed to: walks over the log. I follow, and Hazel halts the horse to assess Della. I can see she isn’t even holding the reins anymore, just white-knuckling the saddle horn with both hands.
“Del, you okay?” I ask. When I pull up beside her, it’s not only her knuckles that are white; she’s pale as a ghost. Even though Storm could get back with his eyes closed, Della won’t be able to ride back; she’s terrified.
“Are you able to ride back?” I ask anyway.
She shakes her head before she responds. “I’m sorry,” she whispers. “I know I’m fucking this up, but no.”
“No big deal,” I say, dismounting my horse. My sister nods and does the same.
“Okay, Del, you’re coming with me,” I say. “Come down.”
She looks at me with wide eyes, and her voice wobbles as she speaks. “I’m just supposed to jump?”
“Yep. I’m here, right here, to catch you if you fall,” I assure her. “Just swing your leg over and slide down.”
Hazel is steadying Storm and petting him to keep him calm. He looks completely relaxed now, so I’m confident everything will go off without a hitch.
“Promise he won’t run?”
“I promise,” I assure her.
Della takes a breath and dismounts. For being as terrified as she is, she does it well, but as soon as the balls of her feet hit the dirt, she starts to tumble.
As promised, I grab her, pulling her into me before she loses her balance, and she clings to me like I’m the last lifeline she has.
Immediately, my sister’s practiced hands work to get Storm ready to be led by shifting some ropes around.
“You’re okay,” I say, stroking her back. She’s not cougar-sound terrified speaking in tongues, but I can feel her still shaking a bit.
“Pretty sure I’m not going to survive this life out here. Murder cougars, horses, and rabbits will be the death of me,” she says with her head on my chest.
A chuckle escapes my lips, but before I have time to respond, my sister is back on her horse’s back, while Della is still rooted in place.
After a quick calculation, I figure we have a bit over a mile left.
Double riding isn’t ideal, but Thor is a crossbreed, so he’s gigantic and capable of carrying more weight than our quarter horses.
“We’re going to ride this horse together, Del.
I’m going to get on, then you are. To do that, I’m going to bring my horse parallel to the log, so you’ll be able to use that for your mount.
Then, when you’re up and behind me, you just have to stay as still as you can and as close to me as possible.
Close and still. Think you can do it?” I hope her answer is yes, because otherwise, I’ll be walking back home leading this horse.
Or maybe I’ll be carrying her and still leading Thor.
“I can do that,” she says.
“Okay, Tatroe, head to your log,” I say before squeezing her shoulders. She does what I’ve asked, and I mount my horse before going to her. Della gets up seamlessly, but wraps around me tighter than she was holding me before.
“We’ll have about a fifteen to twenty-minute ride back; are you okay with that?” I put one hand over both of hers while I hold the reins with the other.
“I don’t have a choice, so I have to be,” she says, then rests her cheek on my back between my shoulder blades as we begin our amble along the path.
“You did good, Del,” I say, patting her hands.
“You’re too kind. We all know I fucked this up big time.”
“Nah. If you had fallen off, gotten hurt, and Storm had run off into the sunset, we would have been in lots more trouble. This is nothing but a speed bump.”
I feel victorious when she elicits a small chuckle, but then I feel her breathe out a long breath.
“Thank you, Jaxon. I’m glad you were here.”
While we slowly follow along, our bodies sway together with the cadence of the horses’ rhythm, and I keep my hand over hers. We don’t talk for most of the ride back, but it’s fine. Something about having her close to me feels like enough.