48. Jaxon
JAXON
When I leave the apartment, I’m giddy because I went from the depths of despair to a spark of hope. And that’s the funny thing about hope; even the smallest flicker can give you life.
It’s the first time in weeks her blue eyes didn’t flash with hurt or hate when they looked at me. And that is my window, my tiny door opening, and I am going to capitalize on it to earn my way back in.
Things are looking up in other areas, too.
We ended up finding three solid replacements for the injured employees who aren’t able to return this season; the fourth is coming back.
Part of my inability to solely focus on ways to win her back is because I have been training them.
But after one more day of working directly with the new hires, and the newfound knowledge that she’s entertaining leaving Amberheart completely, they’ll have to be ready to do it solo.
That’s going to free up a massive amount of time.
On Sunday morning, after not seeing Della since my Thursday apology, I text my sister, even though we are still on tenuous ground.
Jax
Good morning, Hazie! I’d like Della to stay here and want to get her back.
Hazel
I don’t even know how to respond to this wake-up call.
Jax
You say yes, how can I help you, dear brother?
And I would say, great, thank you dear sister, please start talking me up.
Hazel
I love the two of you, Jax, but I’m not sure there’s a path forward.
Hazel wasn’t there during my apology, and she doesn’t know that she looked at me differently. Or the way that she hugged me told me she isn’t done. Or that she laughed. Or that Molly said she does think there’s forgiveness on my horizon.
Jax
Well, let’s assume there is because I’m not willing to give up so easily.
No one realizes the magnitude of my fuck-up more than me. But I can’t have her move. Not yet. I know she’s entertaining the idea of leaving to go to where Quinn lives. And Haze, if she goes, I’m going too.
That earns me a phone call, and a call from Hazel is a big deal. She would rather write out a sixteen-paragraph text message than have a three-minute phone conversation.
“Um, what’s that supposed to mean, Jaxon?” She’s talking in a morning voice and shifting around, and I swear I hear a hushed whisper in the background. Where the fuck is my sister?
“It means I’m not going down without a fight, Haze. I’m owning my mistake, and I hope I can prove that to her before she leaves. Do you know if she has already let her landlord know her plan?”
My sister is quiet for a bit. “Jaxon, if she wants to leave, you have to let her.”
“I know I do. But it doesn’t mean I’m not going to try to keep her. But if she does take off, I’m following her.”
“You would not leave during mid-high season,” my sister states with incredulity.
“I would, Hazel. In a heartbeat without a second thought. I already didn’t choose her once, and that will never happen again.”
“Fine,” she says, understanding how serious I am right now. And I need her to get it, because if both she and Molly are saying good things, that will work in my favor. “To my knowledge, she hasn’t talked to the landlord yet. What are you thinking?”
“I’m going to help her remember the good.” The phrase slips out, even though I haven’t given any thought to a plan yet.
“I’m not trying to be a Debbie Downer here, but it’s not like you guys have years of memories, Jax. This feels kind of crazy, latching onto someone this strongly because you’ve only known her for months.”
Not put off by my sister’s negativity, I reply, “I know. How lucky am I that someone like Della came into my life and that we amassed so many fantastic memories so quickly? And stop sounding like Cayson.”
Hazel sighs before speaking.
“Do you not want us to work out?” I ask my sister because it seems like she’s dragging her feet here.
“It’s not that, Jaxon. No part of me wants her to leave. I just want her to operate independently of you. I want her to stay on her terms so if things between you don’t work, she won’t feel like she has to leave.”
If not a single other person believes in us, so be it. “It’s going to work, Hazel.”
My sister is silent for so long that I wonder if she’s still there. “If you’re hell bent on that, let me tell you what Mol and I have come up with, then. I’ll need your approval anyway.”
“What have the two of you concocted?” I smile.
When she tells me about the resident painter role, I sit in awe listening to my sister. It’s genius. There couldn’t be anything more suitable for Della here at the ranch.
Now I just need her to have extra incentive to stay. If I could help her feel connected not only to memories with me specifically, but to the things we saw and did here, it might help her realize Amberheart Valley is somewhere she doesn’t want to leave. The place she calls home.
How do I help her remember the good?
As I’m tapping my pen on my desk, the thought strikes me so powerfully, I rise out of my seat because it’s perfect.
Holy shit, this is probably the best idea I’ve ever had in my life. Granted, I’ve never had to grovel before, but I’m willing to do anything.
Without giving it a second thought, I grab my keys and head into town.