Chapter 31 #2
Dalziel sat on one of the upright chairs, deliberately not crowding James. He rummaged in a small rectangular bag he’d brought with him and produced a flask. He held it out with a smile.
“This is from Pavel. He’s perfected the cocktail recipe Isher gave him, to Isher’s exacting standards. He thought you might like some.” He set it on the small side table near James. “It travelled in a cool bag so it should taste perfectly fresh.”
James glanced up at me. I gave him an encouraging nod.
He leaned forwards, took the flask, and unscrewed the lid.
The scent leapt out, a mixture of the sweet shops from my childhood and something flowery, possibly blueberries, although never having eaten a blueberry, I couldn’t be sure.
A slight crunch drew my attention to Trace, whose fists were suddenly clenched.
Was he jealous James had been given a gift? Surely not.
James wetted his lips. He didn’t quite manage to meet Dalziel’s gaze as he mumbled, “Thank you. You’re very kind.”
Dalziel’s disbelieving snort was softened by his facial expression as he retorted, “Not something many folk say, but I was happy to bring it along.” He tilted his head, studying James for a long moment.
“You’ve had a rough time of it, haven’t you, Mr Wilson?
Even Edwin and now Trace haven’t managed to help you banish the shadows of your recent past. Something I have no doubt they’ve tried very hard to do, but which might be beyond them.
This leads me to suspect you might do better to talk things over with someone who isn’t involved in your relationship, but who is keenly invested in a good outcome for all. Does that sound agreeable to you?”
James swallowed. He fidgeted with the cushion and the flask, his fingers tapping out a nervous rhythm. The silence in the room stretched until I felt tempted to head outside and light up a cigarette just for something to do.
Eventually, James nodded, a swift up-down.
“I guess so,” he whispered. “But you’ll make me talk about him, won’t you?
” The anguish in his eyes made me once again want to resurrect that fucker Cormack so I could spend the next decade or two torturing him before I staked him for a second time.
Trace moved next to me and laid his hands on my shoulders.
Calm, Eddie. I could hear the words as if he’d spoken them aloud.
“Thank you,” I mouthed. His palms tightened. I’ve got you.
Dalziel shifted forwards in his seat, his expression earnest. “Aye, I will,” he confirmed.
“Because I think we can all agree this is the single most horrific thing that’s ever happened to you.
Correct?” James’ throat clicked loudly. He nodded.
“Then, if we can demolish the monstrosity of a mountain his treatment of you currently has buried you under, perhaps you can begin to tunnel free.” His lips twitched.
“I’m not very good at metaphors, but I hope it suffices. ”
“I understand.” A few seconds passed when all I could hear was James’ ragged breaths. “Do you really think it will work?”
“I believe it’s somewhere to start. I’m no therapist, but I do have some pertinent information about how to chop the mountain into more manageable chunks, so to speak.
” Dalziel still seemed relaxed on the surface, but I could tell by the minute narrowing of his eyes that he was deeply uncomfortable.
What the fuck did he know about this kind of thing and why—Oh my God!
Baxter had intimated that Dalziel had some dark happenings in his past. Were they connected to some kind of physical abuse?
Worse abuse than that even? Had he been through the same sort of torment as James?
My ribs felt like a band tightening around my chest, squeezing the air I didn’t need from my lungs.
It would explain his insistence that consent be not only affirmed, but affirmed vigorously.
I mentally shook my head. No, I was imagining scenarios that had never existed.
He was simply a bloke who moved with the times.
It wasn’t like forcing your attentions on someone had ever been a good idea, even if women especially had had a hard fight to make their voices heard and their wishes abided by.
Dalziel was simply a good bloke who’d seen some sketchy shit in his time and had a ton of experience helping folks get through it.
I was often prone to take the most dramatic road when it came to people I cared about.
“So, when d’you want to get started? I’m sure if it’s helpful, Trace won’t mind if I decamp to his for a bit to give you both some space.” Presumptuous of me, but it wasn’t like I thought Trace would refuse.
Dalziel arched one dark eyebrow in that infuriating way he had. “We’re not doing it here, Eddie. James needs to expunge his negative emotions in a neutral space. This is his home.”
I heard the leap in James’ heart rate and had to physically force myself not to gather him into my arms. With great effort I also managed not to look too defensive as I said, “Where then, Baxter’s?”
“That’s not really neutral either,” Trace pointed out. I sagged a bit under the touch of his strong fingers; he was right. James had begun to view Baxter and her house as an extension of here. It would be unreasonable, potentially cruel, to expect him to work through his issues there.
Dalziel shook his head. “My place, of course. The house in Dalston. I envisage us being gone for about three days.”
James’ heart fluttered like a sparrow caught in a net. I gaped at Dalziel. You’re taking my boyfriend away from me? Over my dead body!