CHAPTER 21 #3
He dropped my waist, doubled over, and began shouting at her in Rihtish.
I sat down in a nearby chair, my head spinning pleasantly around the room.
After a while, it could have been minutes or hours, Helene and Lispen flanked me as a third drink, this one a deep purple, clunked down before me.
I wasn’t sure I would make it through the night.
We drank, and we drank, and we drank. Rihtish drinks had different effects than Inraen ones.
What I hadn’t expected was the peppery drink we had last, which significantly cleared my senses.
I still had a nice buzz, as if I’d had two glasses of wine back home, but nothing like my befuddlement from moments before.
The drink looked like black sludge, but it had a heavy mint undertone and was, on the whole, rather pleasant.
We chased it with a glass of water, then parted ways.
Lex threw an arm around Teke as Helene and Ivank followed them toward the lower city.
Lispen and Raif wandered off in the opposite direction, while I headed back to the keep.
I made my way back to the training room. I was in no state to train, but I had an unreasonable amount of courage, a dangerous lack of sense, and a bone to pick with the weaponmaster.
The door behind me opened. I turned, already expecting him.
Wep let the door swing closed. His sleeves were rolled to the elbow. His shirt and pants were simple. There was nothing to mark him as second in line to become dane.
“No training after drinking,” he said. His voice was flat and too loud for the echoing room.
I exhaled through my nose. This man was on my last nerve. “Obviously.”
“Rough day, then? Being forced back to training is so awful?”
I ignored him, sucked in a breath, but then hesitated. Whatever I had wanted to say to him flitted from my mind.
“Just say it.” His jaw clenched. When I didn’t respond, he went on. “Whatever’s on your mind, out with it. You’re good at telling me exactly what you want.”
I reeled. He did not just go there.
“Fuck. You.” I could barely speak through clenched teeth. “He’s your brother, Wep. Did you forget that?”
His brow furrowed.
“Have any other older brothers you want to tell me about?”
Wep’s mouth pressed into a thin line. “No. Just the one.”
I huffed out a laugh. “Lovely.” I began pacing.
I wanted to scream and rant and rage, but I couldn’t tell how much of it was the alcohol.
Everything between us was so much more real than I expected.
I should have known this was always where things were headed—back to Wep and me.
Regret bubbled to the surface. I was drawn to him from the first time I laid eyes on him in that tent.
I couldn’t stay away. I was a fool to think just looking would ever be enough.
The silence stretched across the room until it was tense and taut. I released it. “How could you?”
Wep cocked his head to the side.
“You could have warned me.”
“That my brother’s a self-inflated ass? You may recall that I did.”
I shook my head.
Wep took a few steps toward me. “Is it my age? Does that matter so much in Inra?” His voice softened.
“What? No, I don’t care about that.” Or rather, I did care. I cared immensely that he wasn’t older. Or that Ell wasn’t younger.
“Then what’s the problem?”
How could I possibly answer that? How did he not realize that he was driving me insane? I couldn’t handle these stolen moments that would never last. I wanted my betrothed to be him, but that was the last thing I could say.
“Serae…”
My eyes snapped up to Wep’s. He was right in front of me now, looking down at me with that furrowed brow and storm-gray eyes of his.
“I’ve been trying to give you space.”
I nodded.
“Was it enough?”
I nodded again.
He growled, “Fuck yes,” before capturing my lips with his own.
My mind went completely blank. My body froze, but my mouth sure as hell took over.
I matched his kiss with every stroke of my tongue.
He kept his arms firmly at his sides, so only our lips were joined.
We were locked in a battle to see who would snap first, though whether I was meant to push him away or crash into him, I couldn’t tell.
Dragons’ flames, he tasted fucking amazing.
I never wanted the kiss to end. Suddenly, the reasons why his body wasn’t pressed to mine were nonexistent.
I wanted to rake my fingers through his hair and pull him into me until he crushed me against the wall, the floor, whatever.
Need for him pooled in my core so quickly and violently, I could barely contain it.
If he touched me, even once, I’d be stripping out of these clothes right then and there.
At that sobering thought, I jumped back. He was my betrothed’s brother!
“You keep kissing me,” I gasped like an idiot.
“Is that wrong?” His eyes fell to my lips, and he frowned as if he too, were questioning the sense of ever having them apart again.
“Why?” Stupid brain! What the fuck does it matter why!
“Is this not what you want?” he demanded, gesturing between us.
“It’s not about you.”
“So, it’s someone else?”
I scoffed. “Everyone else be damned. I don’t care what others think.”
“Then what do you want from me?”
I couldn’t answer. I didn’t know. At that precise moment, Tam’s face flashed behind my eyes, and I squeezed them closed.
Nothing back in Inra mattered anymore. My path, my life, my freedom all lay here in the Riht.
Was kissing the future dane’s brother really so bad an offense? It’s not like we were married yet.
Wep dragged his hand down his face and grumbled, “At least I know what I want.”
“What you want?” I shouted, finally snapping.
“What about what I want? I arrive here, and I’m treated like I’m nothing for weeks.
You show up, belittle me, drill me like I’m a child because I didn’t grow up with your ridiculous dowsae.
Then, out of burning nowhere, you kiss me.
You keep kissing me. What do you expect me to think of that?
What do you think that does to me? Have you ever thought about my side of things?
I was betrothed to a man I didn’t even know, solely to fulfill family expectations.
I didn’t get to agree to it. I was sold away, like a prize calf meant to seal an alliance with my body.
You think that’s a life? You have no idea how that sits in your stomach and turns your insides to rot, having no purpose besides breeding and the posturing of men. ”
Wep took three steps away from me and muttered something that sounded an awful lot like “fucking blind.” When he turned back, eyes wild and raw, his words exploded out of him.
“All I think about all damned day is you! I can’t just—” He ground his teeth.
“You think you’re the only one with restrictions? With family expectations?”
My heart constricted. It was too much.
“Yes, poor you.” I crossed my arms. “Beloved by all, skilled and perfect, and born into Riht royalty to boot.”
“Yeah, let’s focus on you and all your misfortunes.
Wealthy family in Inra. Pampered your whole life.
Never had to do anything hard. Here in the Riht, you have to work, but you’ll be dana, and you’ll have the means and opportunity to do anything.
Any interest, whatever passion, all of it will be yours. ”
A whine escaped my lips. My arms fell to my sides.
There was truth in what he said, but his words ripped me bare.
“You don’t get it. I have nothing. I am nothing.
” My voice dropped to a whisper. “I’m just a tool for an alliance.
Who would ever care to see me? To want me?
” The words hurt to speak, but he had his truth, and I had mine.
My reality, whether in the Riht or Inra, was that my primary function was not my own.
Here, I was bound to Eldreth. And once my father came for me, I’d be plucked from Drakh, placed at Tam’s side, and never thought of again.
I was meant to follow orders, be a good daughter, and be a good future wife.
“Serae.” He held his arms out wide as if presenting himself for sacrifice. “I’m right here.”
Something in me cracked. I flew into his arms, and he caught me easily.
Our lips fused together, and in that moment, I knew only that I had to have him.
I didn’t care if it was wrong. My father and his father be damned.
Our kiss deepened, and Wep’s hands began to roam the curves of my body. I needed more.
I inched backward, pulling him with me until my back met the stone wall. He pressed me against it, and the wall gave me just the right leverage to rock my hips forward. He let out a delicious moan and gripped my waist, encouraging me. More.
I ran my hands up his chest to the nape of his neck, desperately wishing his hair was loose so I could fulfill my recent obsession with raking my fingers along his scalp.
His hands responded in turn, and I gasped when he cupped my breast and ran his thumb across my nipple.
These Rihtish clothes were amazing. I could feel everything through them in the best way.
Our kisses turned frantic, doing little to sate my hunger for him. More.
My hands wandered the planes of his back.
I needed to feel all of him and wasted no time untucking his shirt so I could slip beneath and rake my fingers across his soft skin.
Martyrs, the feel of his hard muscles beneath was everything.
He mirrored me, pulling my underdress loose enough to give his hand access to trace up my stomach.
For a moment, he ghosted along the side of my breast as if asking permission.
I arched into his touch, and he immediately moved to fill his hand with my heaving chest. I broke our kiss with a moan as lightning ran through my body and straight to my core, drenching me at his touch. More, more, so much more.
My hand moved to his cock, completely ignoring the logical side of my brain telling me this was a bad idea.
Still, my hand moved, driven by my own need and desperation to feel him.
He was impossibly hard already, and his breath hitched as I squeezed his length.
Then, his hand at my waist moved to my ass and pressed my center firmly against him.
Another moan escaped me at the pressure and friction.
He recaptured my lips, dipping his tongue into my mouth in time with the thrust of his hips.
Fire and ash, this man was unfairly hot.
“Well, well, well, what have we here?”
We jumped apart, but as I was already against the wall, my awkward jolt made me smack my head against the stone.
Wep’s body leaving mine, aside from making my body protest the sudden cold, only served to further expose the evidence between us.
I ached for his heat to return, but over his shoulder, I locked eyes with the absolute worst person to catch us in this state—Ell.
He stood in the doorway with a brow raised and a mischievous grin on his lips.
Wep tucked in his shirt, cleared his throat, and looked away. I had no doubts that every inch of me was still covered in lust. I couldn’t stop myself from drinking in Wep’s disheveled clothes and broken composure. A flash of pride ran through me.
“My, my,” Ell chuckled. “If I’d known there was this much excitement at home, I would’ve never stayed away. Carry on.” He winked at me as he backed out of the door.
“I’m—I apologize.” Wep’s voice cracked, and he wouldn’t meet my eye. “I shouldn’t have— I didn’t mean to—” He cleared his throat again, then walked briskly out of the room. Ell’s taunting voice resounded from the stairway.
Propped against the wall, vest and underdress askew and alone, the wave of shame finally crashed over me. More poignant still was the sting of Wep’s rejection. The unsaid word that hung in the air had sucker-punched me in the gut. To him, this was a mistake.
For me, this was another lesson to remember. A few stolen kisses were one thing, but this was something else entirely. This could never happen again. This time, I had to mean it.
That night, I paced my room fretting over what to say to Callagh, who would know the moment she walked in that something was wrong.
My fears were needless. Callagh never came.
I collected a tray from the kitchen and ate mindlessly, just to satisfy my growling stomach, which I’d abused by all the alcohol and nothing to soak it up.
When I tucked myself into bed, I thought about the irony that I was the second-born daughter who could have been betrothed to a second-born son. I played the scene over and over in my mind, obsessing about every little detail. It could have gone so many ways, but I had made all the wrong choices.
I was so caught up in the things I had done that I hadn’t stopped to think about the other end of it. Ell’s mocking laughter and taunting words echoed in my mind. That was his reaction to finding his brother entwined with his betrothed? That was the man I’d be bound to?
“You are bound to no one but me,” Vaya’la growled.
My blood ran colder than the chill trapped in these castle walls.