Chapter 31
MAE
I thought my heart might explode inside my chest when he said that.
‘What is this, Jonah?’ I whispered. ‘What are we doing? This is crazy, right? I’m not the only who thinks it’s crazy to feel this way about someone I’ve only known a few weeks, am I?’
‘It’s crazy,’ he agreed. ‘But it feels right, so I’m not going to question it.’
‘No, I agree. Questioning anything never leads anywhere good. Much better to just go with the flow,’ I said, aware that I was rambling now but it was because his face was so close to mine, just a hand’s width across the pillow from me, and he was looking at me in a way I don’t think anyone had ever looked at me.
Nick certainly hadn’t. It made me feel a million things all at once, none of them rational. Or PG rated, for that matter.
‘Mae?’
‘Yes?’
‘I’m going to kiss you now.’
‘Oh. OK.’
And then he did. Thoroughly and deeply. It was the kind of kiss that you hope will never end, because every second, every moment was absolutely perfect, as if orchestrated.
It was the kind of kiss that built in crescendo, starting out tentative, exploratory, before the unfamiliar becomes the familiar and soon you were craving more.
Harder, closer, working yourself into a frenzy, feeling a hunger that you worry could never be satiated.
A desire that couldn’t possibly be quenched.
I moaned into his mouth and it was like a red rag to a bull.
Encouraging, challenging, fiery. He rolled me over onto my back, one hand leaving my face to find my waist, briefly palming me through my jeans before he moved his hand around to my ass, cupping, squeezing, pulling me in closer.
I felt his erection pressing against me and I moaned again.
He growled, low in his chest, and I felt it vibrate against my breasts.
His hand traveled down my thigh, hooked behind my knee and drew my leg up over his.
‘Wait,’ he said, his voice thick as he pulled away from our kiss. I moaned again, but this time with frustration.
‘Not this again,’ I said, frowning. ‘If you can’t tell how much I want you then there is something seriously wrong with you, Jonah Sawyer. I understand you don’t want to pressure me, but I don’t want to wait. I don’t want to take it slow. I want you. All of you.’
He smiled. ‘I was just going to ask if your ankle was OK. I don’t want to hurt you.’
‘Oh, don’t hold back, you can hurt me all you want,’ I blurted out. ‘I mean, no. My ankle is fine. I’d actually forgotten all about it until you reminded me.’
He bent down and nibbled my neck as I arched my back. ‘Let me see if I can help you forget about it again.’
The hand on my leg snaked its way back up my body, pausing briefly at the waistband of my jeans before finding its way underneath my sweater, across my stomach, over my ribs and underneath the seam of my bra.
My breath hitched in my throat when his fingers found my nipple, rubbing and tugging at it in a way that sent electric shocks throughout my body.
‘You have too many layers,’ he complained.
‘We can fix that,’ I replied, tugging at the hem of his hoodie and T-shirt together. I pulled them up over his back, over his head where they got temporarily stuck until, frustrated at having to pause kissing, he ripped them over his head with a growl and discarded them.
‘Oh,’ I said, breathing in the sight of his naked chest. It was wide and muscular and tanned, with dips in all the right places and ridges in all the other places. I drank it in with my eyes before my fingers decided that was enough of that, they wanted in on the action too, and I reached for him.
‘Ah, ah, ah,’ he said, pulling back just out of my reach. ‘Your turn first. Lose the clothes.’
Suddenly shy, I hesitated, but then he caught the corner of his bottom lip in his teeth, anticipation and lust written all over his face, and I felt emboldened. I sat up and removed my top layers, hearing the sharp intake of his breath when I unlatched my bra and my breasts were exposed.
Outside, thunder boomed again in the sky and the tent shook from the onslaught of the storm, but inside, the heat from our bodies and our breath kept us warm.
‘God, you’re beautiful,’ he said, his voice raspy.
He lowered his head to my breast and teased my nipple with his tongue, his hand cupping the other, his thumb teasing it into a stiff peak.
I ran my hands down his back, over his broad shoulders.
His skin was smooth and warm, slightly ticklish when I got too close to his sides.
I made a mental note to remember that for the future.
His mouth found mine again and he supported my weight as he gently guided me back down onto the blankets, his thigh nudged between mine, his hand cradling my head, tangled in my hair, tugging it in a way I found incredibly sexy.
I couldn’t get enough of touching him, marveling at the contrast between the soft and the hard, the smoothness of his shoulders and arms, and the rough stubble on his chin as it rubbed against my face one minute and my chest the next, as he alternated between kissing me and toying with my breasts, as I arched against him.
‘I need you inside me,’ I told him, reaching for his jeans, unbuttoning them and practically tearing the zip open.
He lifted himself slightly, enough for me to wriggle his jeans and briefs over his hips and down his thighs.
They got stuck around his knees, and I couldn’t reach to free them.
Swearing, he stopped kissing me long enough to remove them completely.
And when he knelt back up above me and I saw him for the first time, it was my time to gasp out loud.
His erection was huge and glorious as he stared down at me.
‘Jeans… off, now,’ he barked, and I hastened to oblige.
His pupils flared when I was naked, his eyes devouring me in a deeply personal way that could have made me feel vulnerable, but instead it made me feel sexy.
Desired. It was a heady feeling. His mouth returned to my breast, but only briefly, before he headed south and I realized his intentions.
‘You don’t have—’ I started to say, but he shushed me.
There was a moment of awkwardness on my behalf.
I’d had men go down on me before, or to be more precise, man.
One. He was slightly older than me. I met him at a work function.
He worked for the hospital insurance company.
We both drank too much, danced in a way I was constantly amazed hadn’t ended up on TikTok, and spent the majority of the night slagging off our employers before hooking up in an unused kitchen off the side of the function room.
He’d lifted me onto the bench and gone to town, and while I did orgasm, it was more by fluke than anything else.
Then I’d met Nick, and he’d made it clear from the first time we slept together that that wasn’t something he did.
He didn’t enjoy it, he’d said. It was unhygienic.
Unsanitary. Then promptly asked me to give him a blowjob.
I still orgasmed while we were together, but usually by touching myself while he was inside me.
It was fine. Did the job. I thought it was as good as it got.
Then Jonah buried his head between my thighs and touched me with his mouth and I nearly screamed.
Every single part of me that was already sensitive exploded.
I grabbed the back of his head and held him there, too scared to let him go.
I went swiftly from being unsure about letting it happen, to unable to bear the thought of it stopping.
‘That’s it,’ he growled, licking and sucking, burying his fingers inside me. ‘You like that?’
I bucked and writhed underneath him in answer, until he had to put one hand on my chest to hold me down.
It didn’t take long until I was shuddering and convulsing as an orgasm like nothing I had ever experienced before ripped through me, sending white-hot heat into every corner of my body.
Stars exploded behind my eyelids, as moans rippled out of me in disbelief that it could ever be as incredible as this.
‘You taste amazing,’ he said, crawling back up my body to kiss me. I whimpered, waves of pleasure still rolling over me. He took one of my hands and placed it along his shaft.
‘Can you feel what you’re doing to me?’
I nodded, stroking it with him, feeling it harden even more under my touch.
‘Roll over onto your hands and knees,’ he murmured into my mouth.
‘But I want to return the favor,’ I told him.
‘Another time,’ he replied shortly. ‘I can’t wait to be inside you any longer.’
I obliged, rolling over and offering myself to him.
He grabbed my hips. ‘Do you want this?’
‘I want this.’
He buried himself completely, and this time I did scream, because it was the most intense moment of my life.
‘Oh, Mae,’ he groaned.
I moved with him, starting out slowly, taking his time, but it wasn’t long until he lost control and his movements became erratic, more desperate.
He cried out sharply, just once, and then he was coming too, holding on to my hips as if they were his only lifeline.
We stayed like that for a minute or two, his chest against my back, our sweat mingling as we panted, trying to catch our breath. He managed first, wrapping an arm around me and rolling so that we were on our sides.
‘That was…’ he said, his breath on my ear, kissing my shoulder.
I snuggled in against him. ‘I’d say sensational, but that seems inadequate.’
‘I might have got a bit carried away.’
I wriggled inside his arms until I was facing him. ‘It couldn’t have been more perfect,’ I reassured him. ‘And my ankle is feeling much better already.’
He winced. ‘I totally forgot about that.’
‘I’m glad you did. You might have treated me with kid gloves and honestly, I wouldn’t change a thing.’
He kissed me on the nose. ‘Neither would I.’