Chapter Thirty-Three
Before they knew it, they were into October and the weather had turned.
The leaves were beginning to flutter down from the trees and there was a distinct nip in the air.
Thankfully there had been no more signs of Reggie but Annie still found herself looking out of the flat window of an evening to make sure he wasn’t lurking anywhere.
‘Would you mind if I were to take Adam back to Nuneaton for the weekend?’ Annie asked Ruth one cold and drizzly morning.
‘I’m hoping to bring Peggy and Levi back with me so that Peggy can try on some of the dresses I’ve put by for the wedding.
They’re getting married just before Christmas and I don’t want to leave it too late.
Marie has agreed that Adam and Nancy can stay with them while Peggy and Levi are here so they can sleep in their bedroom. ’
‘Of course I wouldn’t mind,’ Ruth assured her good-naturedly. ‘Go ahead, I’m more than happy to manage the shop.’
And so, on Friday morning Annie set off with Adam. Nancy had decided to stay in the flat. They arrived in Nuneaton just before lunchtime and went straight to Peggy and Levi’s.
‘You’re coming back with me to London on Monday,’ she told them bossily.
‘And I don’t want any arguments. As I told you, you’re going to be brand new from top to bottom on your wedding day and I’ve already selected lots of gowns for you to try on.
While we’re there, we’ll get you measured for a new suit as well, Levi.
My treat. You have got the church booked, haven’t you? ’
‘I certainly have,’ Levi said. ‘It’s one o’clock on Saturday the twentieth of December at Chilvers Coton Church. But regardin’ a suit . . .’ He scowled. ‘What’s up wi’ the one I’ve got? Seems daft to waste a lot o’ money on somethin’ I’ll probably never wear again.’
Annie chuckled as she shook her head. ‘I can remember your suit from the time I came to live with you. It’s as old as the hills and completely outdated, so I’ll have no arguing, please.’ She turned to Peggy. ‘And who is goin’ to give you away?’
‘Sadly, one o’ me lads, Ricky, don’t think they can make it as he’s still away at sea, but Wilf’s goin’ to do ’is best to get ’ere,’ she told her.
‘But if he can’t, Davey’s offered to do it an’ Charlie is standin’ in as Levi’s best man.
’ She sniffed back a tear as she thought of Tom, the son she had lost in the war.
How she would have loved for him to be there to see her get wed.
‘There you are then. It sounds like you’ve been busy.’
‘Oh, an’ I knew I had something to tell yer.
’ Peggy smiled. It wasn’t the day for feeling sad.
‘The circus is here an’ they’re stayin’ fer the whole o’ the winter now cos Mercy has ’ad the baby – a little girl.
I told Barney yer’d be visitin’ soon, an’ they’re both lookin’ forward to seein’ yer.
Me an’ Levi ’ave already been to see the baby, an’ she’s a little beaut.
Levi is tickled pink wi’ her. He’s got Adam an’ a little gran’daughter now. ’
‘How wonderful. I’ll make a point of going on Sunday.’ Annie was delighted to hear their good news and Adam would love another trip to the circus.
On Sunday afternoon they all got ready to visit Barney and Mercy.
Annie was wearing a new blue coat over which she wore the beautiful shawl she had been wrapped in when she was left at the workhouse.
She often wore it now for special occasions.
There seemed no point in leaving it lying in a drawer, and somehow wearing it made her feel closer to her birth mother.
The colour of the shawl complemented the dark-blue coat and when she came down the stairs of the cottage Peggy noticed it instantly.
‘Oh, so you wear it now, then?’ she said quietly.
Annie nodded, wondering why Peggy wasn’t smiling. ‘Yes, I decided I might as well.’ She gently stroked the soft silk. ‘It’s probably the closest I’ll ever come to my birth mother, after all.’
‘But what if it rains?’ Peggy frowned. ‘It might ruin it.’ It always made her feel sad when she saw Annie in the shawl because she knew how much she longed to find her birth family.
‘It doesn’t look like rain,’ Annie answered as she peered through the window. ‘And anyway, if it does, I can take it off and put it in my bag.’
As always, Barney made sure they had the finest ringside seats, and they all enjoyed the performance.
Since Mercy had had to stop performing, Charity had taken her daughter’s place on the flying trapeze, and although she was now approaching middle age, she was still slim and lithe, and a very attractive woman.
Once her performance was over, she took a bow and as her eyes settled on Annie and the shawl about her shoulders, the colour suddenly left her cheeks. She staggered slightly as she turned to leave the ring, where she stood out of sight of the audience studying Annie closely.
She didn’t move until the performance was over and then she positioned herself at the entrance to the big top waiting for Annie to appear.
‘I-it’s Annie, isn’t it?’ She gave Annie a wavering smile. ‘I wonder would you mind comin’ with me to my trailer? I’d like to have a word.’
Annie’s eyes stretched wide. So this was Mercy’s mother. It was the woman she had seen some time ago as she was leaving Mercy’s trailer.
Luca was standing at the other side of the entrance saying his goodbyes to the audience and he too paled as he glimpsed the shawl about Annie’s shoulders.
Peggy stepped in and took Adam’s hand, saying, ‘Go on, pet. I’ll take the little ’un on the carousel, an’ yer can come an’ find us when yer done.’
With a nod, Annie followed Charity, who was still dressed in her glittering trapeze costume, to her trailer, closely followed by Luca.
Charity and Annie had only just stepped inside when Luca joined them, and Charity turned on him in a fury.
‘Right!’ Her eyes flashed. ‘I think it’s time we set the record straight, don’t you?’
Annie blushed and hung her head, embarrassed to be witnessing the two arguing.
Charity turned to her and her voice softened. ‘Do yer mind me askin’ where yer got that shawl? It’s very distinctive.’
‘I was wrapped in it when I was abandoned on the steps of the workhouse as a newborn,’ Annie told her solemnly.
Tears started to rain down Charity’s face.
‘Oh, my dear Lord,’ she gasped. She knew then that the suspicions she had been harbouring for some time must be true.
She knew from what Barney had told her that Annie was the right age and her birthday was on the same day as the baby she had given birth to.
Luca had told her she had been born dead, yet here was living proof that she was very much alive.
She rounded on Luca, and pointed a shaking finger at him.
‘You told me our baby was dead. That you had buried her in that shawl! I was semi-conscious by the time I gave birth and so I believed you. How could you be so cruel? And all because you believed the child wasn’t yours.
’ She viciously stabbed her finger in his chest, causing him to stagger, as all the pain and hurt he had caused her over the years flooded back.
Annie dropped heavily onto the nearest chair, shock coursing through her.
Charity turned to her and gently took her hand.
‘I think you’re owed an apology and an explanation, my love.
You see Luca’ – she nodded towards him – ‘has always been very possessive and jealous around me. In truth I think it’s his only fault.
He was a wonderful husband in every other way.
But every year we take on casual labour when we visit different sites to help erect the big top and the rides.
That’s how we came to know Barney. He helped out one year and kept coming back.
Before you were born, we took on a chap called Don.
A brash sort who thought he was God’s gift to women.
Unfortunately, he took a shine to me and began to follow me about.
Everywhere I turned he was there until one night he caught me behind the big top and became brazen.
Luca came upon us. I was trying to fight Don off, but Luca thought we were in a clinch and pasted him within an inch of his life.
The next morning, Don was long gone and we never set eyes on him again, but that same month I discovered I was with child.
Luca here put two and two together and came up with five.
The stupid fool assumed you were Don’s. It didn’t matter how much I denied it.
I’d never even kissed the chap, but Luca had made his mind up that I’d been unfaithful and moved out of our trailer.
And then on the morning you were born, when I woke up after a long difficult labour, he told me you’d been born sleeping and that he’d buried you without even giving me a chance to hold you.
’ She began to sob broken-heartedly, and Annie’s heart went out to her.
How the poor woman must have suffered to be so wrongly accused and to have lost her child.
‘A-and then some time ago,’ Charity went on in a shaky voice, ‘I glimpsed you and thought how alike you and Mercy were. That’s when I began to ask questions about you, although I was sure I must be wrong.
I couldn’t believe that Luca could be so cruel as to dump my baby.
And then today when I saw you in that shawl .
. .’ Her shoulders slumped. ‘I would have recognised it anywhere. I’m of Gypsy stock and my grandmother made that shawl.
It’s one of a kind. When I questioned where it was, Luca told me he’d wrapped you in it before he buried you.
He wouldn’t even tell me where your grave was. I’ve mourned you all these years.’
Annie looked towards Luca and was shocked to see that he too was openly weeping.
‘Look at her, Luca. Can’t you see that she’s your daughter?’
‘I- I think I made a terrible mistake,’ he muttered brokenly.
Charity nodded. ‘You most certainly have, and Annie and I have been made to suffer all these years because of your unfounded jealousy. This poor girl.’
Luca’s face crumpled as he looked at Annie. ‘I’m so sorry. Can you ever forgive me? I was young and foolish and I let jealousy rule me head.’
There was a tap on the door and it inched open to reveal Peggy.
‘Don’t worry, Adam’s on the swing boats wi’ Barney an’ Levi,’ she told Annie.
She looked at Luca and shook her head. ‘I heard what your missus just said an’ you should be ashamed o’ yerself.
What this poor woman must ’ave suffered.
An’ do you ’ave any idea at all the hardship you’ve caused this poor girl?
I were on duty at the workhouse on the night you left ’er on the steps.
I heard sommat outside and opened the door just in time to see someone disappearin’ off down the road but it were too dark to see who it was.
But seein’ you, I ’ave no doubt who her dad is.
That mop o’ hair o’ yours is quite recognisable an’ it’s the exact same colour as Annie’s. ’
Luca put his head in his hands, his shoulders shaking.
‘Anyway, let me get this young lady ’ome. I dare say she needs time to come to terms wi’ what she’s learnt. An’ you two . . . well, all I can say is yer need to talk an’ sort yerselves out. There’s been enough heartache.’
With that she took Annie’s hand and led her outside where Annie took a great lungful of air. Her head was swimming with what she’d learnt and she didn’t know what to think.
‘Come on, pet. Let’s get yer home. Adam will be fine wi’ Levi.’ Peggy gently led her away and they made the trip back to the cottage in silence.
Once they were there Peggy immediately sat Annie by the fire and hurried away to make her a cup of hot, sweet tea, laced with a little brandy – Peggy’s standby for shock.
Annie simply sat staring into the fire. At last she’d discovered who her birth parents were, but their first meeting had been nothing like she’d always envisaged.
She’d imagined her mother taking her in her arms and whispering endearments to her, but Charity had been far too upset for that.
And rightly so if what she’d said was true.
How could Luca have simply taken her baby away and left her as he had?
And yet he’d thought that she was the outcome of an affair, so could he be forgiven?
At that moment, Annie was far too shocked and upset to decide.
‘Here yer go.’ Peggy handed her a steaming mug and Annie sipped it, enjoying the burn as it slid down her throat.
‘Why didn’t you tell me you’d seen someone that night I was abandoned?’ she asked eventually.
Peggy looked guilty as she turned her head to stare at the flickering flames in the fire. ‘As I said, it were too dark to see who it were apart from the size of ’em. I guessed it were a man, but I couldn’t be sure, so I thought it were a case of least said soonest mended,’ she admitted.
‘And what am I supposed to do now?’
Peggy pursed her lips. ‘Leave ’em to sort ’emselves out, then we can go from there.
It might be that yer want nowt to do wi’ ’em.
Or at least, with ’im. Yer mam weren’t to blame fer what happened, poor soul.
All these years she thought she’d given birth to a dead baby only to find that yer were so close all the time.
It’s enough to break ’er heart an’ I don’t know if she’ll ever be able to forgive yer dad fer what he did. ’
Placing her tea down, Annie untied her shawl and slung it across the back of the sofa. ‘If I hadn’t decided to wear that today, Charity might never have been sure. And to think I had a Gypsy grandmother.’
‘Well, at least we know where yer lovely black hair came from,’ Peggy said, hoping to lighten the mood.
‘But just remember, what you do next is up to you. If you want nowt to do with either of ’em, that’s fine.
You’ve lived long enough without a proper mam an’ dad.
Or it may be that you can build up a relationship with ’em given time.
They don’t seem like bad people an’ it would be lovely for Adam to ’ave a real gran’ma an’ gran’pa, an’ a new auntie an’ uncle.
Not like Mrs Taylor-Lloyd. Just take yer time. ’
Levi brought a very tired little boy home almost an hour later and Annie got him ready for bed, glad of something to take her mind off what had happened.
‘Actually, I think I might ring Marie and Ruth and tell them I’ve decided to hang on for another couple of days, if you don’t mind delaying the journey,’ Annie told Levi and Peggy when Adam was safely tucked up in bed.
‘I think that’s very wise. You’ve got a lot to think about.’ Peggy smiled at her. ‘But just remember it ain’t all doom and gloom. At least you know where yer came from and who you are now.’
‘I do, don’t I?’ Annie gave a little smile. ‘I’m not an orphan any more, am I?’