Chapter 8 #2
They went into the dining room, where the dinner was brought out all at once and Lady Poole begged his pardon for its simplicity. As the table was filled with viands, fish, side dishes, and sweetmeats with scarcely any room to spare, he assured her an apology was unnecessary.
“If there had been even one more course, we would likely arrive late for the performance,” he added cheerfully.
Camilla picked at her food, and he wondered if she was not feeling well.
She usually had a hearty appetite, which was something he appreciated about her.
He viewed it as a part of her character—a woman who lived fully and did not pretend boredom or displeasure simply to be interesting.
She did not hide behind a facade. Perhaps that was what irked him so much about her behavior now.
She was pretending boredom, was hiding behind a facade, and had been doing so at the ball as well. It was unlike her.
When the meal was over, they settled the travel arrangements between them, as the servants brought their cloaks. The inside of the amphitheater would be chilly.
“Pembroke, if it’s all the same to you, Sophia and I will travel in your carriage and leave ours here,” Felix said. Rowe agreed to it, and Lady Poole considered the remaining passengers.
“Our carriage will not hold five of us comfortably. Camilla, I think you had better ride in Pembroke’s carriage as well”—she turned to him—“that is, if you do not mind it.” He shook his head, inexplicably pleased with the arrangement until Camilla protested that she had thought to ride with Miss Milton.
When this was overborne, she answered with a wooden expression that made her displeasure clear.
“Yes, Mama.”
His groom was waiting for him, and Rowe held open the door while Felix helped his wife and her sister into the forward-facing seat, then climbed in across from Sophia.
Rowe was last to take his seat across from Camilla, and when he reached over to pull the door shut, his knees touched hers.
He immediately pulled back to avoid repeating the intimacy, although he was more conscious of her than he usually was. What had come over him?
Felix and Sophia kept up a light and steady conversation, and Camilla would interject a word here and there.
Rowe, preoccupied by this new Camilla he was encountering, did not attempt to do more than add to the conversation when applied to.
They encountered little traffic on their way to Newcastle Street and before long were dropped off in front of the large theater, with Poole’s crested carriage pulling up ahead of them.
Rowe stepped out first and held out his hand to assist Camilla.
When she paused as though to refuse, he knew with a certainty that something was wrong and wondered how to discover what it was.
But then she placed her hand in his and alighted.
He decided to throw his usual behavior to the wind and ask her what was amiss, but he was given no chance to do so because the two groups joined and turned to enter the theater.
He contrived to walk beside her, but apart from acknowledging his presence with a brief glance, she turned to talk to Miss Milton.
He wasn’t precisely frustrated at her obstinacy, for that would be taking things too far.
But he had not thought her to be the sort to display such feminine wiles.
They climbed the stairs to the first-tier gallery where they had seats, and where Pollard was already waiting for him. Beside him sat Weatherby and Gerry Wilmot, and they all stood and turned as the large party entered.
“I proposed the idea to these two and they were keen to attend,” Pollard explained.
Rowe was glad to see his friends until he watched each of them bowing over Lady Camilla’s hand and coaxing her into those smiles usually reserved for him, and now denied. He would most certainly have to speak to her.
He made little attempt to join the conversation that swirled around him, which was eventually brought short by a spectacular opening piece—the fast La Réjouissance of Handel’s Music for the Royal Fireworks.
A circle of silver bay mares with tall feathered headdresses entered the ring led by riders of the same height wearing costumes of the previous century with shiny pale blue justaucorps, breeches, and satin slippers.
The horses pranced in a circle at a smart pace and performed the steps in unison.
This was a thrilling sight, even to Rowe who had seen the act before.
When the riders stood on horseback, one after the other, and rode in perfectly balanced symmetry, the audience thundered with applause.
He glanced at Camilla, who sat at an angle in the row in front of him, her eyes shining with pleasure.
He watched her enjoyment, thinking that this look suited her much better than the ennui she had shown him since arriving in London.
The atmosphere remained lively throughout the performance, and the conversation and refreshments taken between the acts allowed a degree of informality to settle upon the party.
Gerry and Weatherby became better acquainted with Felix and Sophia, then Gerry drew Camilla into conversation.
Pollard seemed to enjoy speaking to Miss Milton, and Rowe did his best to entertain Lady Poole and her youngest two daughters.
At times, he could not resist listening in when Camilla spoke and noticing how natural she was with everyone but him.
The chance to have private words with her he had been waiting for came after the performance while they waited for the carriage to be brought.
Lady Sophia and her husband were caught up in a discussion, leaving Rowe at liberty to pursue his own.
He let his eyes rest on Camilla’s face, searching it for that warmth he had seen earlier with his friends, but which was once again hidden.
“You seemed to have enjoyed yourself,” he said, watching her reaction.
“It is easy to be pleased in such a lively environment. I must be very dull to have found fault with it.”
“You also seemed to enjoy your conversations with my friends.” Oh, devil take it! Now he sounded jealous.
“I did.” She cocked her head with a look that seemed to challenge him to come to the point. The look was not precisely arrogant, but rather assured. This was new.
“And yet, ever since you’ve arrived in London, you have not seemed to enjoy mine.” Well, he had planned on opening the budget, so he might as well do it.
“Do you mean the two times we have met?” Her smile was not quite mocking, but almost.
“Yes, in those two times.” He would not be deterred by pretense since he longed to get to the bottom of her behavior.
“And that would not be remarkable with another woman, but in the nearly three years we have known each other, we have always been good friends, have we not? We are connected through your sister’s marriage to my cousin, and we have spent weeks together at Elmscote. ”
“True. But then we have gone seven months without seeing each other at all, so perhaps we are not as good friends as you suggest.”
“So you are put out because I did not keep up a correspondence with you over the winter? I did write to Miles and included all of his wife’s family.”
“How generous of you.”
“I received but one reply, and it was from Tilly.” Confound it! He had betrayed himself with that last line. Steady, Rowe. This is most unlike you.
The almost mocking smile had returned. “I hardly expected that you would notice whether or not I replied to a letter addressed to my brother-in-law, all of my sisters, and my mother.” He did not like the expression in her eyes that seemed to see too much in him.
“You would have preferred me to write to you directly then,” he said, cynicism coloring his own words.
“I have no expectation that you should write to a lady at all with whom you have no understanding, my lord.”
“Precisely. So I am at a loss to understand your behavior now.” He hardly knew why he was speaking to her in such a tense manner. What had come over him?
She let out a silent breath and trained her eyes at some point over his shoulder.
“There is truly nothing to understand. Without wishing to sound either grasping or pathetic, I am in London in the hopes of securing a suitable match. You will therefore understand why I do not fix myself at your side, lest I give other gentlemen the wrong impression.”
“I do not expect you to be glued to my side, Lady Camilla, but I believe I have cause to expect a hint of your former friendship. Your nature has always been without guile.”
“Perhaps I have grown.” She leveled him with her gaze. “And wish to reserve my friendship for my suitors?”
Why can I not be a suitor? The words snaked into his brain before he could prepare his defense, and they shook him to his core. As soon as he had command of himself, he clipped this odd reaction and brought to an end this rare moment of unguarded speech. It would never happen again.
“You are right to warn me, my lady. I should not wish to frighten away any of your suitors.”
She dipped her head in acknowledgment, a scant turning up of her lips that infuriated him as much for its coolness as its condescension.
“Pembroke. That is your coach, I believe.” Felix led his wife over to join them. Both were smiling and he found it difficult to respond with amiability but pushed himself to do so. They piled into the carriage, and he shut the door before they drove off, ending any further confidences.